Hugh Walpole

“ When Tallboys saw me, he made a sort of spring in my direction, as though he would like to tear me limb from limb; but men who have, like Tallboys, developed their brains at the expense of every other part of them, never meet these situations very effectively, and all he could do was to repeat this parrot-like cry: "By Heavens, I'll have the law on you!"
"Now, we must be sensible," said Borden. "The real truth of the matter is that two or three of us want to test a theory that we have—a theory that, if it's tested thoroughly, will really make a difference to human conditions ”

“ You don't like Johnson's writing, but he's just as enthusiastic as you are about good things in his own way, and, upon my word, I can't understand why you writing fellers who all care about good stuff, in distinction to the rest of us who don't know good stuff from bad—why you should spend your time in quarrelling and getting into little sets, hating one another. Now, I know nothing about literature, but I am not a bad companion, and I could show you one or two things on this island that would astonish you. ”

“ But, after all, if you never say anything and never come into close quarters with anybody, you stand a risk of being misunderstood. Tallboys was misunderstood by a great many people. He first appeared as critic anonymously, and committed, in my opinion, the unpardonable crime of reviewing the same book in various different papers without signing his name, and as he invariably disliked the books that he reviewed, it may be said with truth that somewhere about 1915 almost all the more critical press began to be abusive to current works of fiction, and in many cases to poetry and belles lettres. ”

“ When I at last left the party, I asked myself indignantly why Tallboys should consider himself so superior. People will forgive you robbery, cheating at cards, and murder, a great deal sooner than they will forgive your patronage. The one thing that every human being needs is outside confirmation in the stability of his own position. ”

“ Tallboys had especially got upon his young nerves. That night at dinner he unburdened himself to me. Tallboys had published in The Quid Nunc, only the week before, an article purporting to examine the reasons for the popularity of certain novels. Braun had been one of his victims. He had decided that Braun was popular because of his naïveté, love of platitudes, and execrable English. "Hang the fellow!" said Braun. "Who does he think he is? If he could write a novel himself, there might be something in it, but I never read such stuff as that last book of his." ”

“ I never believed that such absurd letters as those of ours could have brought you."
Tallboys flushed. "It's all very well," he said, "but you'd have gone yourself if you discovered a whole-hearted admirer somewhere. Why shouldn't we care about somebody liking our stuff? We spend all our days and nights thinking about it and trying to do the best we can, and if there's somebody who likes it—well, it's awfully comforting. ”

“ It is also a fact about human nature that the people you dislike are, on the whole, the people with whom you do not come into close contact, that it is very hard to know anybody very well without discovering their good points. Now, Borden and I agreed, after two days in Tallboys' company, that he was indeed a dreary dog, but that his enthusiasm for literature was something extremely fine, finer than anything we ourselves possessed. ”

“ It's quite possible that you will hate both of us and the place more and more every minute that you stay here, but even then we flatter ourselves that the after-effects will be excellent, and that in days to come you will look back to these hours with longing and even think of us with kindness; and if it should happen that you take life a little more cheerfully and see it a little more thoroughly in the round, how well worth while our trouble will have been. You will be happier, we shall be happier, and countless thousands of young novelists, poets, and critics will be happier. ”

“ Of course we don't pretend that we're going to change you altogether, but we do hope and believe that you're going to be a bit different after your three weeks' rest here away from your own rotten set, and getting to know a first-class feller like Jim Perry. We must see our experiment through. Here you are for three weeks. I know that yesterday you tried to get a letter through, and that you offered Bill Perry ten quid if he'd row you across; but, you see, these men happen to be the very best friends Johnson and I possess. ”

“ Tallboys."
"You shall pay for this!" cried Tallboys in the most approved melodramatic manner, striding up. and down the room. "I'll have you in gaol for this before I'm a day older!"
"You can't do very much to-day," said Borden; "there's no boat going to the mainland. Mr. Perry and his two splendid sons run this little farm, and are devoted friends of ours. Except for one boy who is next door to an idiot and an old woman who is next door to heaven, there's nobody on the island at all. There isn't a telephone and there isn't a post office. ”

“ He had made that important discovery that if you want to be taken for a clever man, the less you say the better. It is the garrulous who are the fools, and Tallboys very quickly obtained a real reputation for wisdom and sagacity by dealing entirely in monosyllables and by saying "Do you think so?" ”

“ Next morning Tallboys was at breakfast. I said nothing to him until quite casually in the afternoon I remarked: "Look here, write any letters you like; I'll see that they go."
He nodded his head. I saw him sitting on the beach half an hour later, when I came down to bathe, deep in a novel of Stanley Weyman's. ”

“ Cornwall in the month of May is no light temptation, and Mr. Bickerstaffe, although his praise was certainly a little foolish and extravagant, could probably be endured for a night or two without difficulty. In any case, on a beautiful May evening Tallboys might have been seen, a rather grimy bag in one hand and a waterproof in the other, standing on little Treliss pier and looking about him. ”

“ I and a friend of mine wrote those letters and signed them 'Bickerstaffe.' We were so glad you were able to come."
"Signed them 'Bickerstaffe'!" cried Tallboys, getting up from his chair. "What do you mean? I still don't understand."
"It's just this," said Borden in the friendliest manner. "There are half a dozen fellows in London who think you've been working too hard and haven't been sleeping well of nights. ”

“ Our writers in general have many very obvious faults—they are weak, vain, credulous, sensitive creatures—but they have good points, too, and, taking criticism in general, a rather touching faith in the authority and honesty of their critics. ”

“ I'm sure, ready to make a little sacrifice of our personal interests and comforts. The theory is that artistic criticism, in the direction it takes and the spirit behind it, is based largely upon stomach. ”

“ Its opening sentences were: "In these days of realism some of us are perhaps inclined to overemphasise the virtues of technique and to lay too strong a stress upon the perfection of form, forgetting that there are other things more important in life than the petty disputes of the schools, and that there are many gates into the temple of literature ..." This article was signed "E. Tallboys."
A few nights later I tumbled onto Hilliard, the editor, of that superior weekly. "I heard," he said, "that you've been having Tallboys down in Cornwall with you. It's done his health a lot of good." ”

“ But won't it be interesting? You'll really be able to test your public importance. I admit that it might hurt your feelings if you were, down here for three whole weeks and nobody in London realised it, but, on the other hand, it will make you feel very free and independent."
It was at this moment that I, who had followed in another boat, came in. ”

“ The middle of the following week Jim had a birthday, and a number of fishermen and their wives came over from the mainland to celebrate it. That afternoon, before they arrived, I said to Tallboys: "Look here, there's going to be a party to-night, and some men are coming over from Treliss. ”

“ If you cared, we could discuss many things, or, if you preferred it, I would leave you entirely alone.
The journey is an easy one. You go from Paddington to Truxe without a change, and thence a side-line quickly takes you to Treliss. ”