Mrs. Wilson Woodrow

“ Evans shrilly. "That's what more of us than you, Sadie Nitschkan, would like to know. We ain't bought one thing," her voice rising hysterically.
"You—ain't—bought—one—thing!" repeated Mrs. Nitschkan, in stupefied astonishment. "You ain't bought one thing! Say it again, Effie."
"No, we ain't," snapped Mrs. Evans. "However should we?"—exasperated beyond endurance—"when Marthy Thomas has cavorted off, Lord knows where, with the only list we got, in her pocket."
Mrs. Nitschkan almost collapsed; her powerful and strongly knit frame became limp and flaccid. "Gosh A'mighty!" ”

“ When a sinner like Walt Garvin's in question, Satan's doin' some mighty pretty fightin' to hold him."
"Wasn't all you ladies on time?" asked Mrs. Thomas eagerly, a hopeful suspicion dawning in her eyes.
Mrs. Evans froze her with a glance. "It ain't goin' to do you a mite of good to try an' ferret out the sins of others. Your own is scarlet enough. Maybe," as if generously conceding a point, "one or two of us was a minute over time; but that's nothin' to do with you."
"Listen!" said Mrs. Nitschkan authoritatively, bending her ear toward the ground. ”

“ Now, all of us ladies has probably got some little errands of our own to 'tend to, an' here we are with time to burn before us. Let's see. It's just one o'clock now," looking up at the clock in the square, wooden belfry of the little church, a gray, squat, unlovely tower standing out clearly from its background of deep blue sky and rugged mountains. "Now, why wouldn't it be a good plan for each of us to take an hour to 'tend to any little thing we may have on our minds, and agree to meet at 'Hayman's' at two o'clock sharp? ”

“ He looked at her with wonder, even a curious, speculative awe. "That is why we come," he said. "If you gave us a real sermon, I guess none of us would be there. We've heard too many of them," with a short laugh. "It is you we wish to hear." ”

“ AS THE centers of culture have their women's clubs, their Lenten lectures, classes in this or that, morning bridge, matinées, and afternoon teas, so Zenith included and combined them all in its Ladies' Aid Society: obliterating the boundaries separating these various manifestations of the eternal feminine, but retaining the spirit of each.
A narrow interpretation of the name and purpose of the organization might seem to limit its activities to the worthy, if uninteresting, altruism of the good Samaritan ”

“ Nitschkan savagely. "Good land! What do you want to flirt around with Willie Barker for? Can't you never leave the boys alone? What for did you have to go an' bring this trouble on us? If you hadn't no respect for the rest of us, you might have thought of Missioner."
"You ain't no call to talk to me like you was a she-bear, Sadie Nitschkan, an' I ain't a-goin' to take your sass," retorted Mrs. Thomas, goaded to some show of defiance ”

“ But perhaps its meaning, its hold upon the affections and its place in the life of Zenith are more clearly presented in the words of Mrs. Thomas, one of the most prominent members, than by any contradictory and halting descriptions.
"How'd ever us poor women bear our lives without the Aid Society?" she was wont to ask. "It gives us somethin' to dress up for once a week, an' somethin' to sharpen our wits on an' loosen our tongues over at the same time. ”

“ We'll canvass a little on the quiet, get our folks in line, and elect our own committee. Nothing easier."
The old resident swayed back and forth in her rocking-chair and viewed the speaker curiously. "I guess you don't know what you're talkin' about," she said simply. "Mis' Evans is smarter than greased lightning, and she's went an' got up on—oh, what's this here thing?—parliamentary law. Some of the rest of us tried it; but we couldn't make head or tail of it. She always gets ahead of everybody else. ”

“ She ain't no more to be depended upon than the wind. Did you happen to read over the list, Missioner?" clutching at a straw.
"Just once," answered Miss Benson, "but it doesn't help me. I can remember it in a general way, but that's all. I don't recall it well enough to buy a spool of thread."
"No more do I," groaned Mrs. Evans.
"How would it do," offered the Missionary tentatively, "to ask Mr. Hayman to keep his store open to-night? Then, if we find we can't get through before train time, we can hire a conveyance and drive to Zenith this evening." ”

“ Nitschkan devoutly. "Now, Effie," as they stepped from the train, "we're a-puttin' our trust in you. If you can pull us out of this bog, you're goin' beyond yourself; but you can depend on the rest of us to throw off the scent any nosy coyotes that comes snuffin' around."
This agreement the Committee adhered to; but on the momentous Monday afternoon, when they assembled for the meeting, they seemed to have grown thinner and paler over night. There were worried lines upon their faces, their eyes looked heavy, as if from lack of sleep. Only Mrs. Evans wore a placid demeanor and a calm brow. ”

“ Evans," objected the Missionary gravely, "don't you think it's the only square thing to do, and far better, just to tell the truth to the ladies on Monday afternoon?"
They all exchanged alarmed glances. Such a course would be a virtual abdication of empire.
"No, I don't," returned Mrs. Evans shortly. "I ain't thinkin' of any such thing. You mind that fortune-teller we went to, Sadie Nitschkan? Well, do you remember she looked at my hands, an' she says: 'You're bound to get into scrapes, 'cause you're one of them active temperaments that's got to be always helpin' others ”

“ Thomas cringed—"an' I come to this conclusion: that there's always pretty nearly a remedy for a thing, or there's none. Now, I think I got the remedy; but I'm a-goin' to ask you ladies, one an' all, to keep your mouths shut. If folks come botherin' round to find out what all we done, you just tell them to wait till the meetin' Monday afternoon, an' they'll see. ”