Various

“ He shan't talk it to me, for I will pretend I do not understand even one word. The waiter has left the room. Must the poor man be silent? Thunderweather, ah no! Happilywise he is saved. The considerate proprietor, thoughtful of his countryman's needs, enters; he stands by the visitor's table, and the talk begins. When it ends I cannot say, for I leave them, well started and in good voice, and hear, as I think, their sweetly melodious phrases for the last time in Italy. The train carries me away. There is not much more of Italy now, for here is the Mont Cenis tunnel. ”

“ It was ever so, since time began.
'Tis the way of the maid, 'tis the way of the man.
'Tis also 'the way of a man with a maid,'
For Cupid's barter's the oldest trade."
Oh! the Mistletoe Bough!
Oh! the Mistletoe Bough!
"They are seeking to-day every new fangled way;
Some tell us that wooing has had its day.
In the highest, the lowest, the loneliest lot,
The gleam of Love's berry makes one bright spot.
And years may fly, as they will fly, fast,
But one good old custom at least shall last;
And when Christmas appears still the maids will cry:—
'See! ”

“ Those friendly, lustrous, Irish eyes.
Return and face with us your fate,
The world is small and England great.
You shall return and fill your place,
But never shall I clasp his hand,
Whose bright and smiling boyish face
Makes sunshine in the shadowland. ”

“ Everywhere flowers. If the town rates in Genoa are paid at the Town Hall, the paying of them must be almost pleasant. One would go with that horrible demand note, if that is used also in Italy, and fancy that one was arriving at a ball. The palm-decorated entrance looks just like it. It only needs a lady rate collector, such as one hears of in England, and one surely, in whatever manner the Italians may say it, would beg the charming signora to give one the honour and pleasure of a dance, and scribble her name on the programme—I mean the demand note. ”

“ Until the Police Force is placed under the direct control of the Council, the members will do their best to protect you. It stands to reason that a great community like London should have its own guardians under its own direct control. ”

“ And no doubt, the Italian officials being leisurely and the space being ample, one could find time for a waltz in the intervals of rate paying, or at least sit it out in one of the delightful little gardens of this ideal Palazzo Municipale.
And so farewell to sunny Genoa, and off to Turin. German hotel again, German proprietor, German servants. Solitary German visitor drinking his morning coffee. The hotels of Turin are not crowded; he and I are alone. What will the poor man do? He must talk his awful language to someone. ”

“ But I find a yet more unmistakable evidence in support of my contention in the extraordinary emotional sensibility revealed by these headlines whenever some unfortunate person has been sentenced to death for the most commonplace murder. There is clearly a profound conviction that the jury who heard the evidence, the judge who pronounced their verdict of guilty, the only possible conclusion they could reasonable come to, and the Home Secretary who found himself unable to recommend a reprieve, were, one and all, engaged in a cold-blooded conspiracy against a perfectly innocent man. ”

“ Some of ye anciente goinges on make one wonder whether feasts were better kept when they spelt with such unreasonable euphony. It must have been "merrie in halle" when the wassail song was ordinarily sung as depicted by A. C. Behrend in his exquisite copper etching.
London Society is peculiarly bright and cheerful this Yuletide, and keeps up its excellent reputation. A good medley is London Society. And here is a very bright little Woman this Christmastide. ”

“ The Council do not object to the keeping down of babies in the abstract. But personal violence is contrary to the law. If you really wish to decrease the surplus population, why not work it to death at a board-school? ”

“ O Ghost of Terence (the Corkasian) ! are our youths at Westminster to start thus on their career, with nothing better than a poor pun not worth a punny in their pockets! Let Sagitarius watch this youthful punster's line of life! He will live to be punished! or to be rewarded as he deserves? After all, Great Pun is not dead; he may be dull, commonplace sometimes, but as he was prehistoric, so is he immortal. There is a great future before the author of the Westminster epilogue.
Robert Louis Stevenson. ”

“ I am not sufficiently versed, Sir, to the minutiæ of newspaper routine, to know what precise class of persons are entrusted with this particular responsibility, though I have a strong suspicion that it may be one of the many forms of degrading drudgery which the selfishness of man has imposed upon the weaker sex. ”

“ Pater. But you wouldn't have "A Merry Christmas," and now you object to "A Happy New Year." What do you want?
Mater. Can't you get something impersonal?
Pater. (taking up card) . Well, here's a yacht in full sail. ”

“ Perhaps some one of the numerous leagues established to protect adult citizens against themselves might take the matter up, and insist upon these contents-bills being set up for the future in smaller type and with epithets of a more temperate order. Perhaps Parliament or the London County Council might be asked to interfere. ”

“ And, whoever and whatever the persons performing such duties may be, it is painfully obvious that they are labouring under conditions of mental excitement, the strain of which no nervous system can support for any length of time without inevitable and complete collapse. ”

“ AT THE WESTMINSTER PLAY
Plaudite! Bravo! Brave! Domini Quippus et Punnus are very much alive! A fact that may be inferred from just one line (there are more whence this came) in the Westminsterial play, when Davus takes Mysis "the New Woman," for his wife, and exclaims ”

“ For instance, we might lose a distinguished statesman, or an ironclad, at the very moment when a football match was decided, or when the professional tipster attached to their particular journal published his "finals." ”

“ Leger Coincidence (A) , 135 Suggested Addendum (A) , 126 Sunday Lecture Case (The) , 285 Tale of a Vote (The) , 201 Tale of Two Telegrams (The) , 97 Talk à la Mode de Londres, 261 Talk in Court, 22 Teddie the Tiler, 192 Tempora Mutantur, 131 "Terrible in his Anger!" 159 Terrible Transformation (A) , 145 Thanks to the "Bystander," 133 That Advanced Woman! ”

“ Favourites, 203 Two Ways of Auditing, 206 Unrest! 174 Vacuous Time (The) , 119 Vade Mecum for the Naval Manœvres, 37 Vagabond Verses, 219 Venetian Flower-Sellers, 191 Verse and Choral Summing-up, 203 Verses to the Weather Maiden, 93 "Vested Interests," 186 Village Blacksmith (The) , 282 "Vive la République!" 6 Voice from "the Upper Suckles" (A) , 85 Volunteer's Vade Mecum (The) , 25 Vote of Thanks (A) , 65 Voyage of Alfred (The) , 113 Waiting their Turn, 18 War Cry (The) , 54 Wet-Willow, 107 What's in a Name, indeed? 47 What we may expect soon, 27 Wheel and Whoa! ”