Susanna Centlivre

“ ACT II. SCENE I. Lucasia's Chamber.
Enter Lucasia and Lavinia.
Lavin. Upon my Life, Cousin, I think my Condition worse than yours, and yet you see I am not so much dejected.
Luc. Oh! What Condition is't can equal mine?
Much less exceed it; to be oblig'd to
Break my Vow, to part from my Palante;
Forc'd to the Arms of a mishapen Monster,
Whom Nature made to vex the whole Creation.
Nor is his crooked Body more deform'd
Than is his Soul, Ambition is his God;
He seeks no Heav'n but Interest; nor knows he
How to value ought but Gold. ”

“ Nay, prithee don't be Grave, Charles; Misfortunes will happen: Ha, ha, ha, 'tis some Comfort to have a Companion in our Sufferings.
Char. I am only apprehensive for Isabinda, her Father's Humour is implacable; and how far his Jealousie may transport him to her Undoing, shocks my Soul to think.
Sir Geo. But since you escap'd undiscover'd by him, his Rage will quickly lash into a Calm, never fear it.
Char. But who knows what that unlucky Dog, Marplot, told him; nor can I imagine what brought him thither; that Fellow is ever doing Mischief; and yet, to give him his due, he never designs it. ”

“ Lucy. Gentleman—Valet! Faugh—And what Good will a hundred Crowns do me, when my Virginity is gone? Indeed, if you lov'd me as much as you say, and would make my Fortune, (for I should love extreamly to be a Lady) I cannot tell how far you might persuade me——I know my Reputation would be safe in your Hands.
Piz. Make thy Fortune! Why, I've known some of our Nobles marry a Wife with less than a hundred Crowns——But adod, thou'rt a charming Girl, and therefore I'll make it a hundred Pistoles—What say'st thou now, Lucy? ”

“ Rise Euphenes, your Speech carries a double Meaning, you pray and threaten with the same Breath, we are not to be frighted Lord; the Laws of Sicily have had their Course, your Son falls by them.
Euph. Oh! mistake me not, I am as humble as your Pride can wish me; but give me Leave to speak, tho' 'tis my hard Fortune to offend; let me the Anguish of my Soul deliver to that injurious Lord, the Father of Lysander's, or by the more known Name, Palante's Wife; hard-hearted Man! ”

“ But thy poor Gardee has been abused, cheated, fool'd, betray'd, but no Body knows by whom.
Miran. (Aside.) Undone! past Redemption.
Sir Fran. What won't you speak to me, Chargee!
Miran. I'm so surpriz'd with Joy to see you, I know not what to say.
Sir Fran. Poor, dear Girl! But do'e know that my Son, or some such Rogue, to rob or murder me, or both, contriv'd this Journey? For upon the Road I met my Neighbour Squeezum well, and coming to Town.
Miran. Good lack, good lack! what Tricks are there in this World!
Enter Scentwell, with a Diamond Necklace in her Hand; not seeing Sir Francis. ”

“ How, Mistress, have you trick'd my Husband out of a thousand Pistoles, and never told me of it?
Lucy. Nay, Madam, don't frown——Remember you have trick'd him out of something too, which I never told him of—Don't urge me to more Discoveries.
Lud. (aside.) So——Here's Trick upon Trick: But, Faith, you shall never trick me out of my Liberty. I'm not so fond of a Wife to marry a Chamber-maid, tho' with ten Times as much Money: And so, sweet Mistress Abigail, your humble Servant. ”

“ Eug. Hold, is there no means left to save them? Wou'd not you now, Lord Gravello, give your Daughter freely to Palante?
Gra. More willingly than I wou'd live another Hour.
Euph. Oh! You are kind too late; had you been thus when Need required, you had sav'd yourself and me, and both our hapless Sons.
Gov. Oh Nephew, my Prompter still in Cruelty,
Now thou thyself must feel the Rigour of the Law.
Eug. Now ye behold the Good from Bad, which nought but this Extremity had shewn; yet all be safe, Eugenio lives, and fair Lucasia is no Heiress now.
Omnes. How! lives! ”

“ Enter Charles.
Char.
WELL, here's the House, which holds the Lovely Prize quiet and serene; here no noisie Footmen throng to tell the World, that Beauty dwells within; no Ceremonious Visit makes the Lover wait; no Rival to give my Heart a Pang; who wou'd not scale the Window at Midnight without fear of the Jealous Father's Pistol, rather than fill up the Train of a Coquet, where every Minute he is jostled out of Place. ”

“ Ne'er to admit a Passion in your Breast?
Aur. Oh! Dear Florella, press not a Confession,
Which but too well my Eyes themselves disclose.
Alas! I love—I love to such Excess,
That tho' I know I'm lov'd again, my Mind
Is still perplex'd with Doubts and jealous Fears.
Flor. You love and are belov'd! Then sure you reach
The Height of human Bliss, and bounteous Heaven
Can scarce give more——But who's the happy Man;
Is it not Count Bassino?
Aur. Oh! charming Name; there's Musick in that Sound!
Yes, Count Bassino is the Man I love. ”

“ Enter Larich singing, Francisco, Lavinia, Sancho and Trist.
Larich. Ha, hey, what, every body in Joy! Good News, Coz, Palante come off safe; my pretty Niece pleas'd here, and Son-in-law, Francisco, just receiv'd a certain Information of an Uncle's Death, that has left him, let me see, let me see; ay, ay, enough to please me.
Sancho. Nay, nay, hold, every body is not so well pleas'd neither; I am melancholy, I came hither to see the Execution; but I see no body has occasion to be hanged but myself, for I have lost my Mistress; faith I have, Tristram. ”

“ My stay for three Days more——And here this Letter
Bear to Placentia——speak to her the kindest
The softest Things thy Fancy can suggest.
I shall make good thy Promise——
My dear Placentia! Oh! that she were here,
Panting and warm within these longing Arms!
'Tis a long Age since I did see her last!
But come, my Friend, you must this Hour set forward.
Arm. With all my Heart: But 'twill not be amiss,
Before I go, to fix the Victory,
Which conquering Virtue in your Breast has gain'd;
And if what you pretend be real Truth,
I have a welcome Present for Bassino. ”

“ If we had but the Ghostly Helps in England, which they have in Spain, I might deceive you if you did,— Sir, 'tis not the Restraint, but the Innate Principles, secures the Reputation and Honour of our Sex— Let me tell you, Sir, Confinement sharpens the Invention, as want of Sight strengthens the other Senses, and is often more Pernicious than the Recreation innocent Liberty allows.
Sir Jeal. Say you so, Mistress, who the Devil taught you the Art of Reasoning? I assure you, they must have a greater Faith than I pretend to, that can think any Woman innocent who requires Liberty. ”

“ Eug. Thou tremblest, Lord, hear; you that have condemn'd these noble Friends, and hunt their Lives for a mere Trifle; sentence to Death a Man for loving and being belov'd; hear, a black Deed will start your Soul with Horror, and make you own the Crime before ye nothing.
Gov. What means the Fellow!
Eug. Nay, 'tis not a Frown can stop me, nor will my Fate be long; know then, this Lord gave out his Son Eugenio dy'd at Rome, but he was well, and in this City. ”

“ Gov. Oh spare thy Thanks, till thou hast real Cause: the Law, the Statute's plain, and he must die for't, there is no Remedy.
Enter, brought in by the Guards,
Palante, Clerimont, Lucasia and Eugenio.
Euph. Oh! Son!
Alph. Palante!
Pal. Pardon me, Sirs, I have too much Tenderness upon my Soul already, too many Clogs that drag it downwards; oh! forgive me, if I beg ye wou'd not add more Weight to Death.
Gra. Madam, 'twere more becoming your Quality and Modesty, to be at Home; thou dost but ill return thy Father's Care. ”

“ Enter Charles and Isabinda.
Sir Jeal. Seize her then.
Char. Rascals, retire; she's my Wife, touch her if you dare, I'll make Dogs meat of you.
Sir Jeal. Ah! downright English:— Oh, oh, oh, oh!
Enter Sir Francis Gripe, Mirand, Patch, Scentwell, and Whisper.
Sir Fran. Into the House of Joy we Enter without knocking: Ha! I think 'tis the House of Sorrow, Sir Jealous.
Sir Jeal. Oh Sir Francis! are you come? What was this your Contrivance, to abuse, trick, and chouse me of my Child!
Sir Fran. My Contrivance! what do you mean?
Sir Jeal. No, you don't know your Son there in Spanish Habit. ”

“ Exit Lucy, Ludovico.
SCENE IV. Pizalto's Lodgings.
Enter Pizalto with a Bond in his Hand.
Piz. Well—My Wife's a fine Woman! a very fine Woman! But a Pox she's a Wife still, and this young Jade runs in my Head plaguily: Well——here 'tis under my Hand; a Thousand Pistoles——A great Sum for a Maidenhead, as Maidenheads go now-a-days——Ah, had I been young now.
Enter Lucy.
Oh! are you come! Here, here, Lucy: Here's a Fortune for thee, worth twenty Maidenheads, adod! I have not so much Money by me at present, but there's Security. ”

“ Miran. Ay really, Guardian, 'tis even so. I hope you'll forgive my first Offence.
Sir Fran. What have you chous'd me out of my Consent, and your Writings then, Mistress, ha?
Miran. Out of nothing but my own, Guardian.
Sir Jeal. Ha, ha, ha, 'tis some Comfort at least to see you are over-reach'd as well as my self. Will you settle your Estate upon your Son now?
Sir Fran. He shall starve first.
Miran. That I have taken care to prevent. There, Sir, is the Writings of your Uncle's Estate, which has been your due these three Years. ”

“ Pulls Count Pirro by the Sleeve as he goes out.
Pirro. What art thou?
Eug. A poor Poet, my Lord, little beholden to Fortune.
Pirro. None of thy Profession are, take up some more thriving Occupation; turn Pimp, Solicitor, Gamester, any Thing will do better than Rhiming; there's something for thee, I'm in Haste now.
Eug. My Lord, I thank you for your Charity, and your good Advice; but I have some for you too.
Pirro. For me! what is't?
Eug. I understand, my Lord, that you are to marry my Lord Gravello's Daughter.
Pirro. Yes, an Heiress——
Eug. No Heiress, my Lord, her Brother is alive. ”

“ How to Banter Sir George?
Miran. I must not pretend to Banter: He knows my Tongue too well: (Aside.) No, Gardy, I have thought of a way will Confound him more than all I cou'd say, if I shou'd talk to him Seven Years.
Sir Fran. How's that? Oh! I'm Transported, I'm Ravish'd, I'm Mad—
Miran. It wou'd make you Mad, if you knew All, (Aside.) I'll not Answer him one Word, but be Dumb to all he says—
Sir Fran. Dumb, good; Ha, ha, ha. Excellent, ha, ha, I think I have you now, Sir George: Dumb! he'll go Distracted— Well, she's the wittiest Rogue— Ha, ha, Dumb! ”

“ Reputation, what several Sorts of Slavery do we undergo to preserve thee! for to be thought virtuous, we are forced to be constantly railing against Vice, tho' our Tongues and Maxims seldom agree.
Lucy. Alas! Madam, that Pretence is grown too common: For the Men now take it for granted, that a Lady is very near surrendering, when once she holds out that Flag of Defiance. ”

“ Gov. I Have been searching over all our Sicilian Laws, and know they cannot find one Clause to save Palante.
Enter a Servant.
Serv. A Lady without, my Lord will not be denied your Presence.
Gov. Admit her.
Enter Lucasia.
Luc. Pardon me, Sir, for pressing thus rudely
On your Privacy, I know 'tis boldness.
But I hope the Hour's propitious to me,
Finding you alone, and free from Business,
I promise myself I shall be heard with Patience.
Gov. Were the Business of the World at stake, such Beauty would claim a Hearing, speak Madam.
Luc. Thus low I beg for poor Palante's Life. ”

“ Come, Sir George, let's walk round, if you are not ingag'd, for I have sent my Man upon a little earnest Business, and have order'd him to bring me the Answer into the Park.
Marpl. Business, and I not know it, Egad I'll watch him.
Sir Geo. I must beg your Pardon, Charles, I am to meet your Father here.
Ch. My Father!
Sir Geo. Aye! and about the oddest Bargain perhaps you ever heard off; but I'll not impart till I know the Success.
Marpl. What can his Business be with Sir Francis? Now wou'd I give all the World to know it; why the Devil should not one know every Man's Concern. ”

“ Florella here! she comes opportunely——she may inform me of what I yet but fear——Good-morrow, Florella: How fares my Love, my dear Aurelia?
Flor. Signior, Good-morrow; you are an early Visitant.
Alon. Not for a Man in Love; but answer me, How does Aurelia?
Flor. Well in Health——Only she's now and then in a little Fit of Melancholy, such as usually proceeds from timorous Doubts about that dreadful State of Matrimony. You know the Time draws nigh that gives her to your Arms.
Alon. By Heaven! 'Tis an Age, there's six Days yet to come. ”

“ Am I alive? do I breathe? can I have a human Soul, and suffer this injustice to proceed? Poor Palante, must thou die, because Fortune has not blest thee with her Favours; No, something I will do to save thee ”

“ Re-enter Sir Francis, Miranda, and Scentwell.
Sir Fran. Mercy on me! what's the matter?
Miran. Oh, you Toad! what have you done?
56 Marpl. No great harm, I beg of you to forgive me: Longing to see the Monkey, I did but just raise up the Board, and it flew over my Shoulders, scratch'd all my Face, broke yon' China, and whisk'd out of the Window.
Sir Fran. Was ever such an unlucky Rogue! Sirrah, I forbid you my House. Call the Servants to get the Monkey again; I wou'd stay my self to look it, but that you know my earnest Business. ”

“ There's no living upon Love thou knowest——Tho' Faith I could live well enough too.
Lucy. Well, suppose I help you to a Lady with a round Sum; you'd keep your Word, and marry her?
Lud. I am a Gentleman, I scorn to break my Word.
Lucy. Well, Sir, come to the Mask, and I'll engage you a Mistress, if you are not over-curious.
Lud. With all my Heart:
I'm now resolv'd to leave this Wenching-Trade;
For no man's safe upon a Hackney Jade;
Th' Allay of Danger makes the Pleasure Pain,
A Virtuous Wife will always be same.
The End of the Fourth Act.
ACT V. SCENE I.
A Mask in Bassino's Lodgings. ”

“ Sir me no Sirs, for I'm resolv'd you shall be married to Night.
Enter a Servant.
Serv. Sir, here's a Gentleman to wait on you calls himself Don Sancho.
Lar. Odso, shew him up; now, you Baggage, you shall see the Pink of Learning, one that can travel thro' the whole World in an Afternoon, and sup in Palermo at Night, ha! you shall; you'll be as wise as the Sibyls in a Month's Time, with such a Husband, and will bring forth a Race of Politicians that shall set the World together by the Ears, then patch it up again in the supping of a poach'd Egg.
Enter Sancho and Tristram. ”

“ Ah! adod, I must buss thee; [Kisses her.] Ah! Rogue, methinks I'm a young, lusty, vigorous Fellow again——Thou shalt find I am, Girl.
Lucy, aside. I believe I shall fail you, old Gentleman. Well, my Lord, make it up a thousand Pistoles, and I am your's else I'll die a Maid, I'm resolv'd.
Piz. A thousand Pistoles, why thou art the most unconscionable Wench in Italy: Why, 'tis a Price for a Duchess in some Countries. Come, come, prithee be reasonable, Lucy? ”

“ I must admire him that loves Palante;
Friendship's a noble Name, 'tis Love refin'd;
'Tis something more than Love, 'tis what I wou'd
Shew to my Palante.
Cler. It is indeed a Beauty of the Mind, a Sacred Name,
In which so brightly shines that Heavenly Love,
That makes th' immortal Beings taste each others Joy;
'Tis the very Cement of Souls. ”

“ Let the Tyrant Man make what Laws he will, if there's a Woman under the Government, I warrant she finds a way to break 'em: Is his Mind set upon the Spaniard for his Son-in-law still?
Patch. Ay, and he expects him by the next Fleet, which drives his Daughter to Melancholy and Despair: But, Madam, I find you retain the same gay, cheerful Spirit you had, when I waited on your Ladiship.— My Lady is mighty good-humour'd too, and I have found a way to make Sir Jealousie believe I am wholly in his Interest, when my real Design is to serve her; he makes me her Jaylor, and I set her at Liberty. ”

“ Adod, I'll give thee a hundred Crowns.
Lucy. No Injury, say you, my Lord? Why, I wonder you should be so jealous of my Lady, and preach such religious Maxims to her, when your own Principles are quite opposite.
Piz. Look ye, Child, a Man may do that, which would look abominable in a Wife——A Woman's Reputation is a nice Thing——
Lucy. 'Tis so——and therefore 'tis but Reason I should take Care of mine.
Piz. Prithee, no more of that: Thy Reputation shall be safe; I'll marry thee to my Gentleman. ”

“ Rosco. Ah, no, my Lord, not for your Skill; in your Youth your Lordship saw Plays, conversed with Players, knew the fam'd Alberto.
Grav. 'Tis true, by Heav'n, I have seen that Knave paint Grief in such a lively Colour, that for false and acted Passion he has drawn true Tears, the Ladies kept Time with his Sighs, and wept to his sad Accents as if he had truly been the Man he seem'd, then I'll try my Part, thou hast still been privy to my Bosom Secrets; know'st Wealth and Ambition are the Darlings of my Soul; nor will I leave a Stratagem unessay'd to raise my Family. ”

“ Why look you, Madam! if I have committed a fault, thank your self; no Man is more Serviceable when I am let into a Secret, nor none more Unlucky at finding it out. Who cou'd divine your Meaning, when you talk'd of a Blunderbuss, who thought of a Rendevous? and when you talk'd of a Monkey, who the Devil dreamt of Sir George?
Miran. A sign you converse but little with our Sex, when you can't reconcile Contradictions.
Enter Scentwell. ”

“ Three Days will soon be o'er, and your Return,
Shall make me fully blest——If I should stay
'Twould look like base Distrust, and I can't think
Bassino would be false——
Bass. (aside.) Oh! Heaven that I were not!
Arm. Indeed, my Lord, I think you're truly happy.
Scarce does any Age produce so good a Wife.
Bass. Oh! that I could reward this wondrous Goodness!
Pla. My Lord, what makes you sigh?
Bass. To part from thee: But since 'tis your Desire,
It shall be so. Armando, to thy Charge
I here commit the Treasure of my Soul,
Take Care of her, and think that on her Safety
My Life depends. ”

“ Why should I marry one I cannot love,
And sure I am I cannot love Count Pirro,
Love him! no, I shou'd detest and loath him.
The Cause that made him mine, wou'd hourly add
Fresh Matter for my Hate.
Gov. You have your Choice, I swear by Heaven never to pardon him, but upon these Conditions.
Luc. Oh! I am miserable.
Gov. 'Tis your own Fault, come consider Madam, Palante will thank you for his Life, and if you let him die, you are the Tyrant. ”