Charlotte M. Yonge

“ She is true! that is the best of her. I cannot help caring for Georgina. Poor thing, I hate to see it! Her spirits as high as ever, and with as little ballast; and yet she looks so fagged. She was brought up to dissipation—and does not know where else to turn. She has not a creature to say a word the right way!’
‘Not her sister?’ said Violet. ‘She seemed serious and good.’
‘No one can tell what is the truth in Jane,’ said Theodora; ‘and her sister, who knows her best, is the last person to be influenced by her. Some one to whom she could look up is the only chance. ”

“ She leaned against the tree where the curate had brought her the first tidings of Arthur’s marriage, and she sighed, but not as erst with jealousy and repining.
There was, indeed, an alteration—its beginning may not be traced, for the seed had been sown almost at her birth, and though little fostered, had never ceased to spring. The first visible shoot had been drawn forth by Helen Fotheringham; but the growth, though rapid, had been one-sided; the branches, like those of a tree in a sea-wind, all one way, blown aside by gusts of passion and self-will. ”

“ Violet was much happier than she had thought possible without Arthur, though her pleasures were not such as to make a figure in history. There were talks and walks, drives and visits to the school, readings and discussions, and the being perfectly at home and caressed by mother and daughter. Lady Elizabeth had all the qualities that are better than intellect, and enough of that to enter into the pursuits of cleverer people. Emma had more ability, and so much enthusiasm, that it was well that it was chastened by her mother’s sound sense, as well as kept under by her own timidity. ”

“ Theodora flew to catch her; but she scampered round another tree, shouting with fun, till she was seized and pressed fast in her aunt’s arms and called a mischievous puss, while Theodora exulted in the splendour of her childish beauty, exuberant with health and spirits. The moment she was released, with another outcry of glee, she dashed off to renew the frolic, with the ecstasy of a young fawn, while the round fat-faced Annie tumbled after her like a little ball, and their aunt entered into the spirit of the romp, and pursued them with blitheness for the moment like their own. ”

“ He arrived as Violet came down to greet her party of sponsors. Never had she looked prettier than when her husband led her into the room, her taper figure so graceful in her somewhat languid movements, and her countenance so sweetly blending the expression of child and mother. Each white cheek was tinged with exquisite rose colour, and the dark liquid eyes and softly smiling mouth had an affectionate pensiveness far lovelier than her last year’s bloom, and yet there was something painful in that beauty—it was too like the fragility of the flower fading under one hour’s sunshine ”

“ Then came a pause, lasting till Theodora thought she heard the carriage.
‘You will forgive me if I accept him?’
‘I shall know it is all right. I trust you, dear sister.’
‘Tell me something to help me!’
Violet drew out Helen’s cross. ‘Be patient, be patient,’ she said. ‘The worse things are, the more of the cross to be borne.’
Theodora held out her hand for it. ‘I hope I am mending,’ said she, as she gave it back with a melancholy smile. ‘It does not give me the bad jealous thoughts I had when first I knew you possessed it. ”

“ Do you think I would alter them for this notion of Jane’s?’
‘That is my own dear Theodora! But it is not only that. They are such good people—so kind! You must not risk their good opinion, for they would be so fond of you!’
‘If their good opinion depends on narrow-minded prejudice, I do not wish for it.’
‘If she would but come a day later,’ said Georgina; ‘for I do want you to be with me very much, Theodora! I know I shall meet with nothing but mortification, if you are not. People will only make that little starched bow! And Mr. Finch has noticed your not being so much with me. ”

“ Theodora looked up in his face; the words were applied in a sense new to her. ‘Are humility and submission my cross?’ said she.
‘If you would only so regard them, you would find the secret of peace. If you would only tame yourself before trouble is sent to tame you! But there, I have said what I felt it my duty to say; let us dwell on it no longer.’
The large tears, however, fell so fast, that he could not bear to have caused them, and presently she said, ‘You are right, Percy, I am proud and violent. I have grown up fearfully untamed. ”

“ She had grieved at the entire cessation of intercourse, even by letter, which had ensued when the Finches went to the Continent; and she thought Georgina deserved credit for not having again seen Mark, when, as it now appeared, there had lurked in her heart affection sufficient to induce her to bestow herself, and all her wealth, upon him, spendthrift and profligate as she must know him to be. Miserable must be her future life; and Theodora’s heart ached as she thought of wretchedness unaided by that which can alone give support through the trials of life, and bring light out of darkness. ”

“ You shall have all you wish; I will never do anything you don’t like with the children; and all your family shall come and stay whenever you please; only don’t go away, dear Violet—I cannot spare you.’
‘Oh! don’t, dear grandmamma! This is too much,’ said Violet, almost crying. ‘You are so very kind. Oh! I should be so glad for Arthur to be spared the London winter! How happy the children will be! Thank you, indeed.’
‘You do consent, then!’ cried Lady Martindale, triumphantly. ‘John thought we had not made you happy enough!’
‘John should know better! ”

“ There was a knock at the door. Miss Standaloft stood hesitating and making signs to Violet.
‘Is there any news of Mrs. Nesbit?’ asked Theodora. ‘There can be only one thing to hear. Is it over?’
It was, and the end had been quiet. Theodora drew a long breath, and repeated, ‘Poor mamma!’
‘Do you want me? Do you think I might go to her!’ said Violet. ‘She has no one with her but the gentlemen.’
‘I should be very glad if you were there. Only don’t hurt yourself, or Arthur will be angry; and to have you to nurse would be more than could be borne. My poor aunt! ”

“ Finch said; for whatever were her faults, she was perfectly frank and sincere, clinging to truth, perhaps out of opposition to her sister. Mark was not a man capable of any genuine or strong affection; and as Theodora rightly perceived, the harm of Georgina’s ways was not so much what regarded him, as in the love of dissipation, the unguarded forward manner with all gentlemen alike, and the reckless pursuit of excitement. There was a heart beneath, and warmth that might in time be worked upon by better things.
‘It is a great pity that people will drop her,’ she said to Violet. ”

“ Mrs. Nesbit came in, supported between Lord and Lady Martindale, and as Theodora hastened to wheel round the large arm-chair, and settle the cushions for her, her eye glanced in keen inquiry from one niece to the other, and they felt that she was exulting in the fulfilment of her prediction.
Lord Martindale kissed his daughter with grave formality; and, as if to mark the difference, threw much warm affection into his greeting of Violet, and held her hand for some moments, while he asked solicitously if she were well and strong, and inquired for her little ones. ”

“ Caroline, the second sister, was married and settled in Canada; and the three blanks that weddings had made only now impressed themselves on her mind as a novelty.
After dinner, Violet felt as if she must rescue Arthur from Matilda at any cost, and succeeded in setting her down to the piano; and to secure his quiet, though feeling it a very presumptuous venture, she drew her chair near her father, and set herself to talk to him. Mr. Moss was quite amazed to find a woman—a daughter—capable of rational conversation. ”

“ The sense of her own helplessness and inexperience, and the prospect of illness, without mother or sister, were lost in the more overpowering sorrow at his unkindness. How could he love her if he denied her this at such a time, and in such a manner?’ He is ashamed of my family! ashamed of me! He is disappointed in me! I can’t make it pleasant to him at home. I am not even good-tempered when I am not well, and I am not half as pretty as I used to be! ”

“ Violet thought that she had not given her a single glance, but she was mistaken, Theodora was observing, and forming a judgment.
This wife, for whose sake Arthur had perilled so much, and inflicted such acute pain on her, what were her merits? A complexion of lilies and roses, a head like a steel engraving in an annual, a face expressing nothing but childish bashfulness, a manner ladylike but constrained, and a dress of studied simplicity worse than finery. ”

“ The hope Jane Gardner had given her, of his return to her, when he should have discovered his error, was her first approach to comfort, and seemed to invigorate her to undergo the many vexations of the day, in the sense of neglect, and the sight of his devotion to his bride.
She found that, much as she had dreaded it, she had by no means realized the discomposure she secretly endured when they met at breakfast, and he, remembering her repulse, was cold—she was colder; and Violet, who, in the morning freshness, was growing less timid, shrank back into awe of her formal civility. ”

“ I insist on knowing what you intend to say to him.’
To insist was not the way to succeed with Theodora.
‘I do not exactly know,’ said she.
‘I wish I knew what to do with you!’ sighed Lord Martindale, in anger, grief, and perplexity. ‘You seem to think that people’s affections are made to serve for your vanity and sport, and when you have tormented them long enough, you cast them off!’
Theodora drew her head up higher, and swelled at the injustice. It was at that moment that Lord St. Erme entered the room. She went forward to meet him, and spoke at once. ”

“ Grandchildren and flower were at once in her bosom. Warm, womanly child-love had been forced down to a far corner of her heart; but there it was, and like the rod piercing to the hidden spring, that fragrant gift of love touched it home, and thenceforth it was such fondling as Violet almost feared might be spoiling, especially of Helen; who, however unruly or exacting she might be, seemed only to endear herself the more, and was visibly far more her grandmother’s darling than her gentle, well-behaved brother. ”

“ It was too much for Lady Martindale, who, as she saw Violet colour deeply, and tremble as she left the room, followed her to the head of the stairs, and spoke kindly. ‘You must not imagine, my dear, that either my aunt, or any of us, find fault with you. We all know that you are inexperienced, and that it is not easy to cope with Theodora’s eccentricity of character.’
Violet, still very weak, could have been hysterical, but luckily was able to command herself, though, ‘thank you!’ was all she could say. ”

“ Erme was at her disposal, ready to rejoice at acceptance, even if she should tell him that she had no heart to bestow. She would be no longer spurned and cast aside; she should be able to befriend Violet, she would live uncontrolled, adored; above all, she would teach Percy Fotheringham that she did not pine for him! She would belie those foolish tears that Violet had seen her shed!
As she opened the gate to leave the gardens, Lord St. Erme rode by with a young lady. Was he passing from her power? The spirit of rivalry prompted a gracious bow and smile. ”

“ I do not like his happiness to be in such perverse hands, yet I am uneasy at the delay. It suits my aunt’s predictions, and they are far too apt to come true. I feel them like a spell. She always foretold that Helen and I should never marry. And it cannot be denied that she has great insight into character, so that I am alarmed at her declaring this will not come to good. If not, I have no hope for Theodora! She will either be hard and unfeminine, or turn to worldliness, and be such another as my aunt. ”

“ With much diffidence he replied: ‘I speak only of my own feeling. To me, a fine landscape without associations has no soul. It is like an unintellectual beauty.’
‘There are associations in the West Indies,’ said Theodora.
‘Not the most agreeable,’ said Lord St. Erme.
‘There is the thought of Columbus,’ said Violet, ‘his whole character, and his delight as each island surpassed the last.’
‘Now, I have a fellow-feeling for the buccaneers,’ said Theodora. ‘Bertram Risingham was always a hero of mine. ”

“ How little can letters convey the true state of affairs! They can but record events—not their effects nor the insensible changes that may have taken place. My aunt’s death I know, but not what my mother is without her. I have heard of my father’s cares, but I have yet to see whether he is aged or broken. And Theodora, she has had many trials, but what can she be—tamed and refined as they tell me she is? I wish I could have gone through London to see Arthur and Violet. There again is the anxious question, whether his repentance is really such as his touching letter led me to hope. ”

“ John’s Gospel.
Johnnie’s delight had been the dressing the cathedral cup with a spray of holly sent to him from Brogden by his aunt, and now he sat conning the hymns he had heard in church, and musing over his prints in silence, till his brow caught an expression that strangely blended with those dreamy impressions of his father.
‘Poor children! they have had a dull Christmas-day!’ said Arthur, as they came to bid him good night.
‘No, no, papa; the owl-man has had such a game at play with us in the dining-room!’ cried Helen. ”

“ Those paintings and statues seemed to cry out to me that human souls had been sacrificed to them! The toil and devotion of a life would be too little to atone! Oh! that it were more able and effective. Means and judgment go but a little way!’
‘Your heart and happiness are in the work,’ said Theodora, seeing how he was carried away by his feelings.
‘Yes. There is a sense like the labourer’s at his daily task, and though there is the mountain of things undone, there is the hope that all are not wilfully neglected. ”

“ Nonsense! I thought I was content only to know him safe from Jane—still his real self. I am. That is joy! All the rest is folly and selfishness. That marriage! How disgusting—and what crooked ways! But what is that to me? Jane may marry the whole world, so that Percy is Percy!’
The children were heard on the stairs, and Helen rushed in, shouting, in spite of the silencing finger, ‘Aunt, it is the owl man!’ and Johnnie himself, eager and joyous, ‘It is the man who came with papa.’
‘He met us,’ said Helen. ”

“ He never could have lived,’ said Mrs. Nesbit: ‘it was much as it was with this child of Arthur’s. He was born unexpectedly at Vienna. Your mamma had a dreadful illness, brought on by your father’s blundering sudden way of telling her of the death of poor little Dora and Anna. He has not a notion of self-command or concealment; so, instead of letting me prepare her, he allowed her to come home from the drive, and find him completely overcome.’
Theodora better understood her mother’s stifled sympathy for Violet, and her father’s more openly shown feeling for Arthur. ”

“ Violet some little time after chanced to go to her room to ask her a question on her way to dress, found her knock unanswered, but heard sounds which caused her gently to open the door.
Theodora was kneeling by the bed; her face buried in her hands, her neck crimson, sobbing and weeping in such violent grief as Violet had never witnessed. She stood terrified, unnoticed, hardly able to bear not to offer comfort; but she understood that nature too well not to be convinced that no offence would be so great as to break into her grief and to intrude upon what she chose to hide. ”

“ Theodora knew that she might tell her tale; and sitting in her favourite place on Violet’s footstool, with her head bent down, she explained the error between the two cousins.
‘How glad I am!’ said the soft voice, ever ready to rejoice with her. ‘Somehow, I had never recollected it, he is so like what he used to be. I am very glad.’
‘Don’t treat it as if it was to concern me,’ said Theodora. ‘I care only as he remains the noblest of men.’
‘That he is.’
‘Don’t wish any more, nor think I do,’ said Theodora. ‘I never liked stories of young ladies who reform on having the small-pox. ”

“ Lord Martindale treated the threat with great displeasure, and to Violet it was like annihilation. When thankful for Mark Gardner’s absence, she was to be made to pursue him, probably in order that he might continue to prey on Arthur in secret, and then, at the year’s end, bring them as witnesses that he had abstained from open transgression; she was to see her husband become the idling Englishman abroad, in the society most likely to be his ruin; to have her children exposed to the disadvantages of a foreign education—what more was wanting to her distress? ”