David Christie Murray

“ The oil-lamp which hung in the hall was flickering uncertainly as Polson and the General walked towards the foot of the staircase, leaving the passage in darkness for a second or two at a time, and then flaring up with an unwonted brilliance. The young man took a bedroom candle from a table at the stairfoot, lit it, and motioned the General to precede him. He, altogether military in gait, with his shoulders squared to the utmost, marched upstairs as if he were heading an assault by escalade. Polson followed, drooping. ”

“ It was a time for comradeship, if only for the fact that it was Christmas Eve, and coming fast towards Christmas morning. But the thought of the slain porker was in all men’s minds, and made them expansive and generous and reserved by turns. Boom! said the gun from the Redoubt, and the earth spluttered between the collar of Sergeant Polson’s jacket and his neck, and dribbled comfortlessly down his back, colder than any charity he had known of: lately-frozen earth, half thawed, with wet snow on the top of it, and a sulky boom behind to add a threat to its cold sting. ”

“ She made a picture never to be forgotten; a picture to be recalled on stormy nights at sea; in many a lonely hour of contemplation on alien shores; in many hours of sickness and delirium, in summer heats among the vineyards on the banks of Alma, in winter frosts in the trenches of Sevastopol; in convalescent wanderings amid the dumb reminders of English dead at Scutari; and later, too, in happy hours when the storms of youth were over, and manhood’s heart had found safe anchorage, and the dear head was touched with silver. ”

“ But I think on the whole, Sergeant, that you have acted like an unusually damned good fellow. Do you mind?’—he pointed to a sunken tomb by a motion of one of his crutches, and he sat down upon it. ‘What has a fellow got to do when another fellow has fetched him out of the fire at the risk of his own life, and one fellow hates the other fellow like the very devil? I’ll tell you straight, Polson,’ said De Blacquaire, in his old-mannered drawl, ‘I’d have seen you damned and done for before I’d have reached out a finger to save you. ”

“ There’s men that does hundreds, Polly, and are never bowled out at all! I’ll tell you what. It ain’t me having been dishonourable as stands between us. It’s your own pride, Polly. It’s a good pride. It’s what you might call a righteous pride. But if I was just what I am, without being your father—if I was just what you might call an average old sinner, you wouldn’t let me beg like this, Polly. No, you wouldn’t! And look here, Polly. Money’s money, and here’s a thousand pound——’
‘Damn your thousand pounds,’ cried Polson. ”

“ It’s an infernally disagreeable life—it’s a beast of a life for a gentleman to live. It’s all very well, of course, if you’re amongst your own set; but a gentleman ranker is certain to have a hell of a time. He has all the non-coms on to him out of jealousy; and he’s bullied and browbeaten beyond endurance. As for the mere rough side of the living, nobody minds that. But if you do what you intend, you’ll find before the week’s over that you’ve stepped into a whole tubful of scalding hot water, and you’ll wish yourself well out of it again.’
‘That’s all right, old chap,’ said Polson. ”

“ To Polson Jervase it speaks of half-a-dozen things at once; it awakes with a crushing sense of certainty that late suspicion; it tells him of the ruin of the one man whom he most loves and honours in this narrow world—not his father, but the grey old father of his sweetheart; it tells him in an instant of a life of narrow means for the girl he loves; it hurls his own hopes in the mire, and makes the very thought of them a dishonour ”

“ There goes the first boom of cannon from the Russian side, and a round shot sends the earth spluttering amidst the staff as it canters by once more, plumes waving, and epaulets, and scabbards, and gold lace, and all the fine tinsel of war, as yet unsoiled, glittering in the sunshine.
This is no day for a cavalryman to win honour. Here we sit on the hill-side with a downward slope before us, and an upward slope beyond, and the unmounted men are working their way onward and upward, whilst we are held inactive. ”

“ Shake hands, Polly.’
Father and son shook hands, with no very great good will, if the truth must be told, on the side of the younger; for Polson had yet to learn a lesson or two and had not caught the art of forgiveness for the repentant sinner who was still prosperous. It is a great deal easier for almost anybody to forgive the criminal who has fallen to hunger and tatters than it is to find an excuse for him when he goes in shining broadcloth and lustrous silk and patent leather. ”

“ It’s all true. But look here, Polson, when this fool’s out o’ the way we can make a fight for credit. It’s him as deserves to suffer, and it’s him as has got to suffer to begin with.’
‘Me!’ cried James. ‘Me that deserves to suffer? Who was it put the thing into my mind? Who was it that came time and time and time again to whisper into my ear, and tell me where I could find the men—and—and—and everything? Why curse you——!’
‘Look here,’ said John Jervase. ‘You’re a sidesman and a trustee, and the Lord alone knows what all. ”

“ If you can find a way of hitting old Jack Jervase without hitting the boy, find it and do it. But ever since I’ve heard about you, folks have told me that you pride yourself on being a gentleman; and if a gentleman is going to take it out of a chap who has nearly died for him, when he had every right to leave him alone, and when it was the biggest kind of blunder to rescue him, I’m no judge of what a gentleman ought to be.’ Major de Blacquaire moved the point of the crutch to and fro on the moist gravel, and made his hieroglyphics in the soil without response for a minute or two. ”

“ There was a candle carried by a hospital nurse in the sombre uniform of her craft, and behind it came a lady whom every waking man there present turned to thank, if it were only by a movement of the enfeebled hand, or a droop of the eyelid, or a motion of the deadened lips. Men who are dying after long sickness in hospital cannot cheer. Men who fall in the full tide of the strength of manhood on the battlefield can acclaim their leader. ”

“ The tartan fellows are lounging along, half of them with the stem of a grape bunch between their teeth, loading and firing as they go, scarcely a man of them having stood fire before, and walking towards their baptism of death and blood with an astounding cheerfulness, and the long waving broken line converges as if by instinct, and, as the historians of the battle tell us, without definite order from any quarter, towards that grim gash on the hillside, until it grows to be something of a mob, so thickly clustered that the Russian batteries cleave lines through it. ”

“ Raglan’s immortal two guns come into play from the knoll on the distant right, and the tide of battle is turned again. And all the while we of the cavalry division are maddened with excitement, and consumed by ennui, by turns, wearied with thirst and heat, and waiting in vain for our chance to strike a blow at the enemy. Bored and tired and athirst, the men who have stood for hours at the bridle throw themselves on the sunburned grass. ”

“ It’s the fire of God, to my way of thinking, and it burns out all manner of meannesses, and hypocrisies, and we should have a devil of a lot more to be ashamed of than we have if we didn’t get into a solid fight now and again.’
‘It is a school, sir,’ said De Blacquaire.
‘By heaven, sir,’ said the solemn General, ‘it is a school.’
‘But there are more class-rooms than one in the great school house of human nature, and whilst the General was setting forth his theories of war, young Polson Jervase was setting out a theory of another and an opposite fashion as he walked the deck with Irene. ”

“ De Blacquaire went stumping along on his crutches in the weak spring sunshine, and Polson and his father, by mere chance, were looking after him when he paused at the corner of the one important monument in the grounds, and raised his forage cap to some person as yet unseen.
There is a sort of legend often taught in verse and fiction to the effect that no one true lover can be near another without the presence being felt. ”

“ But to have an approved and veritable here for a lover, and to live at the same time as the sole heroine of so narrow a little world as a shipful of soldiers the incense of whose hearts went up about her constantly, was to be more than merely proud and happy. Polson had got a permanent crick in his neck from that bit of Russian lead which had caught him just as he dropped into the trench with De Blacquaire. ”

“ But at last he said, in his Cambridge drawl:
‘You’re an illimitable old bounder, but you’re rather a clever old bounder, when all is said and done, and I suppose I shall have to let you go.’
‘Major de Blacquaire,’ said Jervase, ‘if ever there was a man mistaken in this world, you’re a mistaken man. I don’t want your ticket, and I don’t want your pardon. I’ve had two years to think this over in. I’ve been without my lad all the time, and I’ve come out here to find him broke and wandering in his mind. ”

“ Arnaud has been for camping south of the Balkans, and giving battle to the power of Russia there, and Raglan has been all for the Crimea and the road to Sevastopol. And no man has known what to believe amongst the divided councils of the Allies. The men amongst the vineyards are plucking and sucking the grapes. The sun grows hotter and hotter, and there is so dreary a silence in these waiting hours that the angry neigh of a horse is heard for a mile along the line. ”

“ The bugles sang out the assembly in the barrack square. Polson both heard and understood, but his father did neither. Within half an hour the regiment would be on the march, and already the red-coated, brass-helmeted men, shining from head to foot and glittering in the fine array war wears before the exchange of the first blows, were moving about the open.
‘Now look here, Polly,’ said Jervase, striving no longer to disguise the wet eyes and the breaking voice, ‘it’s take it or leave it. There’s your father’s hand. ”

“ And the hearts of the listeners rose to their throats, and men were quiet whilst the music sounded. The notes reached far, and fell on many a drowsy ear, conjuring up visions in the half-slumbering minds of humble whitewashed village steeples, far and far away. Polson’s contingent, drawn from a distance of some two hundred yards, stuffed that ingenious musician with half-cold roast pork, and left him well rewarded for his toils. ”

“ Sick men who have been half-starved for a year or two, and who have run through every note of the gamut of emotion, may be quicker to appreciate these influences than common people are: but Polson Jervase, lying on his back and staring upwards in a futile endeavour to trace the semi-circular ring of smoke upon the ceiling, felt them all deeply. ”

“ As he spoke, the epauletted cocked-hatted owner of the slaughtered charger was leaning downward, detaching something from a holster, and when he looked up he displayed the features of Major de Blacquaire.
Until that instant neither could have recognised the other, but at the first glance there was a challenge in the eyes of either.
‘Thanks, my man,’ said De Blacquaire, laying a hand upon the rein which Polson held out towards him.
Nothing could have been more savagely incisive than the tone, nothing more purposed to wound. ”

“ And here is a hill to the west of us, and the hot sun, yet shining clean and bright through whiffs and shreds of scattered smoke, goes down behind it, and the shadow lengthens, and creeps up the brown-green face of the hill to the left. And lo, on a sudden, a sweating galloper on the crest of the hill, with his horse one lather from haunch to bridle, is tearing down with orders. Here is old Stacey in the saddle again, and his hoarse voice is calling. The tired and thirsty souls are alert in an instant, and away go the Heavy Dragoons at a walk until the hill is breasted. ”

“ Grand rounds came tramping down the trench and the men about the fire rose up and stood to attention.
‘What is this?’ asked De Blacquaire. ‘Who’s in charge here?’
‘I am, sir,’ Polson answered, saluting.
‘What’s the meaning of this blaze here? Can’t you see that you’re drawing the enemy’s fire? Report yourself to me at noon to-morrow. Scatter that stuff, and trample it out.’
A foot was thrust into the embers, and they flared up suddenly. The Major recognised his enemy, and looked from his eyes to the stripes upon the left sleeve of his ragged overcoat. ”

“ Grand rounds went by, and the scattered fire faded.
‘If you can manage to hack a slice of that pork off, Sergeant!’ said Volnay, ‘I’m beastly hungry.’
‘Done, I think, to a turn,’ said Polson. ‘Who’s got anything that will cut?’
‘I’m tould, sir,’ said a voice out of the darkness, with a rich oily brogue in it, ‘that there’s hours of difference between here and Limerick. Won’t it be Christmas morning in old Ireland, sir? And will the bells be ringing?’
‘Ye’re out in your reckonin’,’ said another voice amid the shadows. ‘It’s exactly the other way. Your folks is going to bed in Limerick. ”

“ What in the name of hell did you fetch me out for?’
‘You go to sleep,’ said Polson, ‘and don’t ask ridiculous questions.’
‘I want to know,’ said De Blacquaire.
‘I’ll tell you to-morrow,’ the Sergeant answered. ‘But it’s no good thinking about things just now.’
Again there was a silence, and it lasted for a full hour. The rank petroleum lamp in the sconce burnt out and left a sickening stench upon the air. The whole space in which the wounded men lay went dark, and the wild free wind and the cruel driving rain beat at the window. In the black darkness voices spoke here and there. ”

“ He was very deeply moved indeed, and Polson was profoundly sorry for him; but there was a sick whirl in the lad’s mind which robbed him of any clear power of thought and seemed indeed to deaden feeling itself. Only he knew that nothing could undo his shame. Nothing could ever make him respect himself again. Nothing could give back to him the old sense of honour, the knowledge that he came of honest folk.
‘Look here, Polly,’ Jervase broke out again, ‘I haven’t bred you up to be a common soldier. ”

“ Now John Jervase was undoubtedly a good deal of a rogue, but no man is all of a piece, and he had one or two good characteristics. Amongst them was a true and deep affection for his only son, and if at the beginning of his career he had had any such hope of honour and credit as his son had bidden fair to bring him as he neared the close of it, he would have made a better man. Polson’s quietly expressed resolve pinched him a little inwardly, and he gave the boy a glance of gratitude. ”