Margaret Mayo

“ Each word of Jimmy's was apparently goading him on to greater anger.
“Now don't get hasty,” Jimmy almost pleaded. “The whole thing is no doubt perfectly innocent. Talk to her gently. Win her confidence. Get her to tell you the truth.”
“The truth!” shouted Alfred in derision. “Zoie! The truth!”
Jimmy feared that his young friend might actually become violent. Alfred bore down upon him like a maniac.
“The truth!” he repeated wildly. “She wouldn't know the truth if she saw it under a microscope. She's the most unconscionable little liar that ever lured a man to the altar.” ”

“ Oh, no. You've only made me the greatest joke in Chicago,” he shouted. “You've only made me such a laughing stock that I have to leave it. That's all—that's all!”
“Leave Chicago!” exclaimed Zoie incredulously. Then regaining her self-composure, she edged her way close to him and looked up into his eyes in baby-like wonderment. “Why, Allie, where are we going?” Her small arm crept up toward his shoulder. Alfred pushed it from him rudely.
“WE are not going,” he asserted in a firm, measured voice. “I am going. Where's my hat?” And again he started in search of his absent headgear. ”

“ Zoie and Aggie looked at each other in a dazed way. They had a hazy recollection of having seen one babe disappear with the Italian woman, but what had become of the other two?
“Where did they go?” asked Aggie.
“I don't know,” said Zoie, with the first truth she had spoken that night, “I left them with Jimmy.”
“Jimmy!” shrieked Alfred, and a diabolical light lit his features. “Jimmy!” he snorted, with sudden comprehension, “then he's at it again. He's crazy as she is. This is inhuman. This joke has got to stop!” And with that decision he started toward the outer door. ”

“ Jimmy regarded her with growing uneasiness. “What are you up to now?” he asked.
“I don't know yet,” mused Zoie, “BUT YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TELL AGGIE—that's ONE SURE thing.” And she pinned him down with her eyes.
“I certainly will tell her,” asserted Jimmy, with a wag of his very round head. “Aggie is just the one to get you out of this.”
“She's just the one to make things worse,” said Zoie decidedly. Then seeing Jimmy's hurt look, she continued apologetically: “Aggie MEANS all right, but she has an absolute mania for mixing up in other people's troubles. ”

“ And you have hurt mine through and through.”
“But how, Alfred, how?” asked the small person, and there was a frown of genuine perplexity on her tiny puckered brow. “What have I REALLY DONE,” She stroked his hand fondly; her baby eyes searched his face.
“It isn't so much what people DO to us that counts,” answered Alfred in a proud hurt voice. “It's how much they DISAPPOINT us in what they do. I expected better of YOU,” he said sadly.
“I'll DO better,” coaxed Zoie, “if you'll only give me a chance.” ”

“ Alfred turned to his trembling wife with suppressed excitement, and patted her shoulder condescendingly.
“Control yourself, my dear,” he said. “Control yourself; I'll get your babies for you—trust me, I'll get them. And then,” he added with parting emphasis from the doorway, “I'll SETTLE WITH JIMMY!”
By uncovering one eye, Jimmy could now perceive that Zoie and Aggie were engaged in a heated argument at the opposite side of the room. By uncovering one ear he learned that they were arranging a line of action for him immediately upon his reappearance. ”

“ His sarcasm was lost upon Zoie. Having finished all she had to say to him, she was now apparently bent upon indulging herself in a first class fit of hysterics.
There are critical moments in all of our lives when our future happiness or woe hangs upon our own decision. Jimmy felt intuitively that he was face to face with such a moment, but which way to turn? that was the question. Being Jimmy, and soft-hearted in spite of his efforts to conceal it, he naturally turned the wrong way, in other words, towards Zoie. ”

“ But in spite of these discouragements, Zoie did eventually tell Alfred the real truth, and before the sun had risen on the beginning of another day, she had added to her confession, promises whose happy fulfillment was evidenced for many years after by the chatter of glad young voices, up and down the stairway of Alfred's new suburban home, and the flutter of golden curls in and out amongst the sunlight and shadows of his ample, well kept grounds. ”

“ This time it was her turn to be angry. “So! It's your FRIENDS that are worrying you!” In her excitement she tossed Alfred's now damaged hat into the chair just behind her. He was far too overwrought to see it. “I haven't done you any harm,” she continued wildly. “It's only what you think your friends think.”
“You haven't done me any harm?” repeated Alfred, in her same tragic key, “Oh no! Oh no! You've only cheated me out of everything I expected to get out of life! That's all!”
Zoie came to a full stop and waited for him to enumerate the various treasures that he had lost by marrying her. ”

“ Aggie was very emphatic in her opinion to the contrary. “Certainly not!” she said.
“Then,” decided Zoie with a mischievous smile, “I'll get Alfred to carry me to the couch. That way I can get my arms around his neck. And once you get your arms around a man's neck, you can MANAGE him.”
Aggie looked down at the small person with distinct disapproval. “Now, don't you make too much fuss over Alfred,” she continued. “YOU'RE the one who's to do the forgiving. Don't forget that! What's more,” she reminded Zoie, “you're very, very weak.” ”

“ Almost vanquished by her friend's new air of cold superiority, Zoie was now on the verge of tears. “Somebody must have a new baby,” she faltered. “Somebody ALWAYS has a new baby.”
“For their own personal USE, yes,” admitted Aggie, “but who has a new baby for US?”
“How do I know?” asked Zoie helplessly. “You're the one who ought to know. You got me into this, and you've GOT to get me out of it. Can you imagine,” she asked, growing more and more unhappy, “what would happen to me if Alfred were to come home now and not find a baby? ”

“ He could imagine his dinner companions all pretending to sympathise with him, while they flayed poor Zoie alive. She would never have another chance to be known as a respectable woman, and compared to most women of his acquaintance, she WAS a respectable woman. True, according to old-fashioned standards, she had been indiscreet, but apparently the present day woman had a standard of her own. Alfred found his eye wandering round the table surveying the wives of his friends. Was there one of them, he wondered, who had never fibbed to her husband, or eaten a simple luncheon unchaperoned by him? ”

“ And with that Jimmy sat himself down on the far corner of the couch and proceeded to ruminate on the havoc that these two women had wrought in his once tranquil life.
Zoie gazed at Jimmy in deep disgust; her friend Aggie had made an excellent suggestion, and instead of acting upon it with alacrity, here sat Jimmy sulking like a stubborn child.
“I suppose,” said Zoie, as her eyebrows assumed a bored angle, “there are SOME babies in the world outside of Children's Homes.”
“Of course,” was Aggie's enthusiastic rejoinder; “there's one born every minute.” ”

“ Unprepared for the electrical effect of her remark, Zoie found herself staggering to keep her feet. She gazed at Alfred in amazement. His arms were lifted to Heaven, his breath was coming fast.
“'The REAL TRUTH!'” he gasped, then bringing his crushed hat down on his forehead with a resounding whack, he rushed from her sight.
The clang of the closing elevator door brought Zoie to a realisation of what had actually happened. Determined that Alfred should not escape her she rushed to the hall door and called to him wildly. There was no answer. ”

“ While Alfred and Jimmy were saying “good-night” to each other, Zoie and Aggie in one of the pretty chintz bedrooms of Professor Peck's modest home, were still exchanging mutual confidences.
“The thing I like about Alfred,” said Zoie, as she gazed at the tip of her dainty satin slipper, and turned her head meditatively to one side, “is his positive nature. I've never before met any one like him. Do you know,” she added with a sly twinkle in her eye, “it was all I could do to keep from laughing at him. He's so awfully serious.” ”

“ Aggie did not answer.
Zoie leaned forward toward the mirror to smooth out her eyebrows with the tips of her perfumed fingers. “Good gracious,” she cried in horror as she caught sight of her reflection. “You're not going to put my hair in a pigtail!”
“That's the way invalids always have their hair,” was Aggie's laconic reply, and she continued to plait the obstinate curls.
“I won't have it like that!” declared Zoie, and she shook herself free from Aggie's unwelcome attentions and proceeded to unplait the hateful pigtail. “Alfred would leave me.” ”

“ Jimmy could not help feeling that this lure to Alfred's senses was absolutely indecent, and he said so.
“Upon my word,” answered Aggie, quite affronted, “you are getting as unreasonable as Alfred himself.” Then as Jimmy prepared to sulk, she added coaxingly, “I was GOING to tell you about Zoie's lovely new negligee, and about the dear little crib that just matches it. Everything is going to be in harmony.” ”

“ Zoie busied herself with her toilet, and turned a deaf ear to Aggie. There was a touch of genuine emotion in Aggie's voice when she continued.
“Just think of it, Zoie, Jimmy will never be able to come and go like a free man again.”
“What do I care how he comes and goes?” exclaimed Zoie impatiently. “If Jimmy had gone when we told him to go, that woman would have had her old baby by now; but he didn't, oh no! All he ever does is to sit around and talk about his dinner.” ”

“ The mere sound of the word made Jimmy shudder, but engrossed in his own troubles Alfred continued without heeding him.
“Henri, the head-waiter, told me,” explained Alfred, and Jimmy remembered guiltily that he had been very bumptious with the fellow. “You know the place,” continued Alfred, “the LaSalle—a restaurant where I am known—where she is known—where my best friends dine—where Henri has looked after me for years. That shows how desperate she is. She must be mad about the fool. She's lost all sense of decency.” And again Alfred paced the floor. ”

“ When Jimmy was again able to think consecutively, he concluded that considerable conversation must have taken place between Alfred and the small one, while he was recovering his breath and re-adjusting his wilted neckwear. He was now thrown into a fresh panic by an exclamation from the excitable Zoie.
“You must both meet my friend, Aggie Darling,” she was saying. “I am bringing her with me to the hop to-night. She is not at all like me. You will like her dreadfully.” She smiled at Jimmy as though she were conferring a great favour upon him. ”

“ But Alfred was not to be robbed of his exaltation, and again he circled the room, making strange gurgling sounds to Baby.
“Did a horrid old Jimmy take him away from fadder?” he said sympathetically, in the small person's ear; and he glanced at Jimmy with frowning disapproval. “I'd just like to see him get you away from me again!” he added to Baby, as he tickled the mite's ear with the end of his shaving brush. “Oh, me! oh, my!” he exclaimed in trepidation, as he perceived a bit of lather on the infant's cheek. ”

“ And again she turned her back upon Jimmy.
“But don't you see,” protested Jimmy, “this would all be so very much simpler if you'd just own up to the truth now, before it's too late?”
“It IS too late,” declared Zoie. “Alfred wouldn't believe me now, whatever I told him. He says a woman who lies once lies all the time. He'd think I'd been carrying on with you ALL ALONG.”
“Good Lord!” groaned Jimmy as the full realisation of his predicament thrust itself upon him. ”

“ A redoubled effort on the part of the young stranger directed their attention in the right direction.
“My God!” exclaimed Alfred tragically, “it's Baby. He's crying.” And with that, he rushed to the crib and clasped the small mite close to his breast, leaving Zoie to pummel the pillows in an agony of vexation.
After vain cajoling of the angry youngster, Alfred bore him excitedly to Zoie's bedside. ”

“ Aggie admitted that Zoie was no doubt speaking the truth.
“Jimmy has awakened Alfred's paternal instinct for twins,” declared Zoie, with another emphatic nod of her head, “and now Jimmy must take the consequences.”
Jimmy tried to frame a few faint objections, but Zoie waved him aside, with a positive air. “It's no use arguing. If it were only ONE, it wouldn't be so bad, but to tell Alfred that he's lost twins, he couldn't live through it.”
“But Zoie,” argued Aggie, “we can't have that mother hanging around down stairs until that baby is an old man. ”

“ Jimmy knows,” he concluded. Then turning to the uncomfortable man at his side, he demanded imperatively, “Tell the officer the truth, you idiot. No more of your jokes. Am I a father or am I not?”
“If you're depending on ME for your future offspring,” answered Jimmy, wagging his head with the air of a man reckless of consequences, “you are NOT a father.”
“Depending on YOU?” gasped Alfred, and he stared at his friend in bewilderment. “What do you mean by that?”
“Ask them,” answered Jimmy, and he nodded toward Zoie and Aggie.
Alfred appealed to Aggie.
“Ask Zoie,” said Aggie. ”