Various

“ Wednesday.—Calvé as Carmen simply perfect. That is all I have to say; like the Raven (not Barnaby Rudge's, but Edgar A. Poe's) , I announce "Only this, and Nothing More." And Alvarez as José, "Gentleman Joe," who does not drive, but is driven to madness, first-rate; in last scene, struggle and assassination most thrilling, dramatically: even stall-by-the-season'd opera-goers holding breath, and clutching at backs of seats. Audience, ordinarily indifferent to fate of heroine in last act, wait till bitter end. They only quit when quite sure Carmen cannot possibly sing any more. ”

“ Daddy will dandle the Darling,
And show him his beautiful toy.
Hushaby, Pet! Baby, don't fret!
Sleepery, Peepery Boy!"
Briggs had just reached the end of the second verse when his keenly sensitive ear caught the sound of a latchkey turning in the door. A look of terror crossed his face. "It's she! It's she!" he cried. "Oh, Robinson, if she finds you here! Oh, if you love me, fly!" I needed no second bidding. With a hasty grip of the hand I bade my friend farewell, and this is the last that has been seen of Briggs of Balliol. ”

“ I've come to ask you to vote for my husband, Mr. Honeyball; he's not a Tory, you know, he's a thorough-going Radical.... Not going to vote for either of them?—Now why?... Oh, no, I'm sure you're not—you're much too pleasant and gentlemanly to be a horrid Socialist!... You want everything done away with? Well, the Liberals are going to abolish a lot of things. There's the House of Lords, for instance, you're against them, I'm sure.... Not more than you are against the House of Commons? Oh, but you don't really want to destroy one of our most ancient institutions!... Capitalists? ”

“ Punch,—New Woman dead? Not a bit of it. Don't believe she ever existed. Never met her anywhere myself, and never met anybody who has. It's my belief there "ain't no sich person." Merely an idea or an influence, don't you know; and you can't shake hands, go into dinner, dance, or flirt with a poisonous influence, any more than you can with a bad smell. Whatever she is, though, afraid she's driven me into evil courses—rhymes. ”

“ The first question is: 'Will you, if elected, see that every man in Barkshire over fifty years of age has three acres of the best land in the parish, with a cow for every adult child and a calf a-piece for each infant in arms?' Certainly; I hope I may live to see established those desirable conditions as between man and man. ”

“ Surely you're in favour of letting the Irish manage their own affairs?... No, that's such a mistake; they won't want to manage ours—at least, except Imperial matters—and why shouldn't they?... All that can so easily be settled afterwards.... Don't you call 'One man one vote' a great reform?... Isn't it monstrous that some people should have five or six votes, while you only have one?... ”

“ No, electors of Barkshire, let him stay. If he is put outside, he loses the opportunity of observing your behaviour, and learning how gentlemen comport themselves when publicly assembled in discharge of a solemn duty. (Loud cheers. A Voice, 'That fetches 'em!') I was about to observe, when our friend's feelings temporarily overcame him, that since I entered the room I have had a number of questions handed up to me. They are a little late, since I am no longer a candidate but am duly elected. ”

“ Because the New Woman is like the "Old Gentleman,"
Heard of more often—thank heaven—than seen.
Shouldn't worry if I were "Misoneogynist." New woman fad nearly played out, only a black cloud floating across the blue sky of common sense. ”

“ He has become a New Man, you see." I looked at Trotter in bewilderment. "Why, you see, he is married—yes, he married the O'Gress, you know. Poor Briggs! I saw him yesterday, and, upon my word, I should scarcely have known him. But go and see him yourself; you will never believe my story."
Trotter wrote me the address on a card, and the next day I called. The maid looked somewhat surprised when I asked for Mr. Briggs. He was at home, oh, yes, he was at home, but she didn't know whether he could see me or not, as he was feeding the baby. ”

“ Then, if Barristers do not flock in sufficient numbers to the banners of the Lamb, the Horse, and the Griffin, why not throw open the ranks to wealthy persons—so to speak—fond of the leaders of litigation? ”

“ And ecco I arrive, and the sky is blue! Not it is the blue of Napoli, not it is the blue of Geneva, and perhaps it is to-day only, but veramente it is blue. It is much curious.
Also I have found other things blue. Some time the sea is pale blue. Some time the milk is pale blue. And one english says to me, "The sea was rough and the wind blue," but this not can I understand. The his friends say he likes chaff. Diavolo, what taste! But perhaps the chaff is much helpful for the digestion, like the english brown bread, which some brave men eat. ”

“ All the principals sang in French, "knowing the language," but clever Chorus stuck to Italian. Benissimo! Bevignani beaming, and beating time. House crowded; elections and political parties disturb not the harmony of Covent Garden. Yet "last week but one" announced, and end in view. Wagstaff, seeing Calvé in first act with scarf or belt round waist, suggests riddle, "Why is Calvé a perfect Carmen?" ”

“ Williams about the false doctrines of the Nonconformists. The explosion of this shell in the Nonconformist camp has not improved Mr. Williams's chance of success, and he probably believes in the truth of the old saying, that "Good wine needs no Bush."
A Pull All Together.—What our forefathers would have called "seeking an explanation from one's representative," is now, in these days of political slang, known as "pulling your member's leg!" Witness what happened in West Fife:
"Mr. ”

“ Paradoxical Purpose.—To convert West Leeds into "North Leads."
A TRUE SPORTSMAN'S TIP.
At anti-gambling "spoil-sports," loudly
The "sportsmen" they would spoil are fretting.
Good friends, though you protest so proudly,
The true spoil-sport is—Betting!
Although it suit the baser sort,
What's sport to them is death to Sport!
"Piccadilly Sports" is a headline conjuring up pleasant visions of races, and other jinks unconducive to the peace and comfort of law-abiding citizens—only authorised race in Piccadilly, the "purblind race of miserable men." ”

“ It seems a little hard on a Parliamentary candidate when he is seriously misrepresented by his own friends. This is what Mr. Michael Williams has suffered in the St. Austell division of Cornwall at the hands of his friend Canon Bush. With every intention of doing Mr. Williams a good turn, the worthy Canon fired off a letter in the local press containing a serious misquotation of a speech said to have been made by Mr. ”

“ In this competition the Marines were the best, "all told."
A Smoking Christian Concert.—In these smoking hot July days a Smoking Mission seems a good notion. Yet the Baccy-nalian missionaries may probably have to say, "We have pipe'd unto you, and you have not responded," except as long as the supply held out. Will there be distributed tracts entitled A Bird's Eye View of Heaven, A Short Cut to Truth, Returns to Virtue, What is Life?—A Mixture! ”