Anthony Hope

“ I object to being ridiculed, especially by women. I determined to take a hand in the game. I wondered if they knew that Daynesborough was married.
“I suppose this young Daynesborough enjoys himself?”
“Well, he ought to. He’s got nothing to lose; but he seems a melancholy, glum creature. I think he must be one of the king’s kidney.”
“Or married, perhaps?” I suggested airily.
“Oh, no! She wouldn’t have him here, if he were married.”
I saw that Dumergue did not yet appreciate the princess in whose household he had the honor to serve. ”

“ The young people were very civil to her when any one of them happened to be next her at table d’hôte, and at other times thought nothing about her; but Miss Grey endured agonies enough for an hotelful of people. She shuddered at Maggie’s striped waistcoat and white sailor’s knot with its golden pin, at her brown boots, at her love of long and hard rides, at her not infrequent slang; above all, at the terms of [141] hearty and familiar camaraderie on which she thought fit to conduct her acquaintance with Captain Petrie. ”

“ He evidently meant mischief, for I heard his ball whiz past my ear; I missed him clean, being much out of practice, and, I dare say, rather nervous. I pulled myself together for the second shot, for I saw that my opponent was not to be trifled with, and I should not have been [15] the least surprised to find myself in paradise the next moment. On the word I fired; the baron fell back with a cry, and simultaneously I felt a tingle in my left hand, and the unmistakable warm ooze of blood. The witnesses ran to my opponent, and raised his head. Dumergue turned round to me:
“Are you hurt?” ”

“ I needed no one to tell me that Lady Daynesborough had better, as the princess would have phrased it, not be troubled with the matter.
I had no difficulty in meeting the young lord. In spite of the times we live in, a Jason is still a welcome guest in most houses, and [61] before long he and I were sitting side by side at Mrs. Closmadene’s table. The ladies had withdrawn, and we were about to follow them upstairs. Daynesborough was a frank, pleasant fellow, and scorned the affectation of concealing his happiness in the married state. ”

“ I bowed, and he continued.
“The only things I cling to in life, Mr. Jason, are a quiet time at home and my income. You have been very discreet. If you hadn’t, I might have lost those two things. I am very much obliged. Will you give me the pleasure of your company at supper? Dumergue, the princess will be delighted to see Mr. Jason?” ”

“ General Closmadene rose from his chair. Daynesborough drank off a very large “white-wash,” and added:
“Come to dinner to-morrow—eight o’clock. We shall be alone; and, for Heaven’s sake, say nothing.”
I said nothing, and I went to dinner, carrying the ruby ring in my breast-pocket. But I began to wonder whether the little princess was quite as childlike as she seemed.
Lady Daynesborough dined with us. She was a tall, slender girl; [63] very handsome, and, to judge from her appearance, not wanting in resolution and character. ”

“ Dumergue noticed my little start.
“What’s the matter?” he asked.
“Do they know my name?” said I.
“My dear friend, could you expect the baron to fight with an unknown man? The challenge had to be in your name.”
I had clearly been the challenger. I was consumed with curiosity to know what the grievance was, and how the countess was concerned in the matter.
“The countess assured us,” said Vooght, “that she had your authority.”
“As fully as if I had been [10] there,” I answered, and Dumergue resumed his tune. ”

“ There’s a cup of coffee downstairs,” said the other, whom I took to be Dumergue.
After coffee, we got into a close carriage with a pair of horses, and drove two or three miles into the country; my companions said little. Dumergue twice asked in a joking way how I felt, and Vooght puzzled me very much by remarking:
“They are bringing all the necessaries; but I don’t know what they will choose.”
When this was said, Dumergue was humming a tune. He went on for five minutes, and then said, with a touch of scorn:
“My good Vooght, they know our friend’s reputation. They will choose pistols.” ”

“ While we talked, the audience grew impatient. However wonderful a feat may be, the public likes to have things kept moving. They thought Waterer had been in the air long enough, and there were cries of “That’ll do! Let him down!” “Give us another.”
The manager held a hasty conference with the Loadstone: he seemed to urge her; but she [213] shook her head again and again, and would do nothing but lie back in a chair, and pass her hand to and fro over her head. The rajah looked at her with a slight smile. The clamor increased. ”

“ Miss Tabitha Grey had not reached the age of forty-five years without acquiring an extensive and unfavorable knowledge of her sex. Men were wicked; Miss Grey admitted and deplored the fact, but it was so much in the order of nature that she had almost ceased to cavil at it. ”

“ I thought this course very prudent, and said so. “But,” I added, “I shall be called as a witness.”
“No; Colonel Despard will.”
“Well, then——”
“He will establish an alibi. Voilà tout!”
“I am glad it all ends so happily, sir.”
“Well, there is one matter,” said the prince. “I had to tell [52] the princess of your indiscretion in taking Mme. Vooght——”
“Who, sir?”
“Mr. Jason,” put in Dumergue, “has not heard that the countess and Vooght are married.”
“Yes,” said the prince, “they are married, and will settle in America. Vooght is a loss; but we can’t have everything in this world.” ”

“ He got into a second-class smoking carriage—one of the long compartments divided into separate boxes by intervening partitions reaching within a yard of [80] the roof, a gang-way running down the middle. On seeing him enter, I caught the guard, gave him twenty marks, and told him to admit no one except myself and my companion into that carriage. Then I hauled Lady Daynesborough in, and we sat down at the opposite end to that occupied by her husband.
The train started. It was only five-and-twenty minutes’ run to the station for the princess’ villa. There was no time to lose. ”

“ I always went—taking credit of course for much amiability—and I often received my reward in an unexpected development of something new or an interesting revival of a former episode. It happened, a few months after my adventure at [32] Heidelberg, that my brother’s wife, Jane Jason, asked me, as a favor to herself, to take a stall at the theater where a certain actress was, after a long and successful career in the provinces, introducing herself to a London audience. Jane is possessed by the idea that she has a keen nose for dramatic talent, and she assured me that her protégée was a wonder. ”

“ Dumergue shook his head dolefully.
“She holds the trumps,” he answered. “Jason, she’s a clever woman. We thought we had hoodwinked her. When Daynesborough turned up, looking, I’m bound to say, very sheepish, the prince was really quite annoyed. He told the princess that she must send him away. She refused flatly. ‘Then I shall consult my brother,’ says the prince. ‘I shall consult the king too,’ said the princess. ‘It’s indecent,’ said he. ‘It’s not as bad as taking my [72] ladies to masked balls in disguise,’ she answered. ”

“ But if this gentleman says he is Colonel Despard, I take leave to contradict him.”
“I should advise you to do nothing of the sort,” said I. “M. Dumergue knows me very well.”
“This person,” said the baron, “passed himself off as Colonel Despard, and, by that pretext, obtained from me the honor of a duel with me. ”

“ Vooght was biting his nails harder than ever; Dumergue shook his fist at me, but, I thought, more in jest than in anger. I kissed my hand again as the train and the carriage whisked by one another, and I was borne on my way out of their reach.
[31]
CHAPTER II.
At the Hôtel Magnifique.
To a reflective mind nothing is more curious than the way one thing leads to another. A little experience of this tendency soon cured me of refusing to go anywhere I was asked, merely because the prospects of amusement were not very obvious. ”

“ After another despairing appeal to the Loadstone, the manager came forward and made a lame speech. The Loadstone was exhausted with her unparalleled exertions. She must rest; presently she would bring him down. Then Waterer’s friends arose and ascended the platform. They walked about, they stood on one another’s shoulders; they made it clear that no cords held Waterer. [214] A pair of steps was called for and brought. Placed on a sturdy table, they just enabled a man to reach Waterer’s feet. One mounted amidst intense excitement. Turning to the rajah, I exclaimed, “Look!” ”

“ The excuse was good, and Waterer departed, full of boastings and self-confidence, to gather together a large number of the noisy men, and make a pleasant party to “guy” the unhappy Loadstone. I stayed to smoke a pipe with the rajah.
“Of course she’s a fraud,” said he; “and I believe that animal really has got hold of the right explanation.”
“I shall go and see it,” I announced.
After a moment’s silent smoking, [208] the rajah looked up with a twinkle in his eye. “So shall I—if niggers are admitted.” ”

“ I enjoyed myself very much. The princess was evidently, to [38] judge from her conversation, a little Puritan, and I always love a pretty Puritan. That rogue Dumergue agreed with all her views, and the prince allowed his silence to pass for assent.
“We do try at court,” she ended by saying, “to set an example to society; and, as the king is unmarried, of course I have to do a great deal.”
At this moment, a servant entered, bearing a card on a salver. He approached the princess.
“A gentleman desires the honor of an audience with Her Royal Highness,” he announced. ”

“ Jason.”
“I beg your pardon, sir?”
“The princess,” continued Dumergue, “was terribly agitated and annoyed at the scandal and the duel which followed. And of course the countess left the court, and returned to England.”
“To England?”
“Yes; she was a Miss Mason. The king ennobled her at the princess’ request.”
[43]
I smiled and said:
“And now there is a question about who her escort was?”
“There is,” said Dumergue. “It is believed that the baron entertains an extraordinary idea that the gentleman in question was no other than——”
“Myself,” said the prince, throwing away his cigarette. ”

“ When he reappeared he made no reference to his friend the conjurer. He slunk about the Quad, looking very pale and upset. I met him once, when I was with the rajah, on our way to lecture. The rajah smiled urbanely at Waterer, and said to me, when he had passed:
“It’s such a rude thing to call a gentleman a nigger, isn’t it?”
Waterer has not done it again. And the Loadstone never did that trick again. She took the pony, though. The manager called on Waterer, and asked for a check. I think that incident pleased the rajah most of all. ”

“ The old gentleman was in the best of tempers, and the two young men did their best to keep him in it, indorsing all his views as to the lax morality and disgraceful tone which pervaded modern literature and modern society; and when they had done their duty in this way they rewarded themselves by going in next door and having tea with Dora Chatterton, a young lady [158] whom they both thought charming. ”

“ Come, now, be a good girl and stop it. I’ve had enough.”
“Are you drunk?” asked Mlle. Claire impatiently. “It’s all over.”
“I won’t be made a fool of,” said he angrily. “Stop it, or not a farthing do you get from me.”
“Heaven bless the man, he’s mad!” exclaimed the lady, who began to be a little uncomfortable herself. It is an eerie thing to see a man looking hard at—nothing, and listening intently to—nothing.
Suddenly he jumped up and ran toward Mlle. Claire. He seized her by the arm, and cried, [224] “Stop, you little devil, stop! Do you want to madden me? ”

“ Oh, he was a white man. So here I am, Joe—here I am, thank God!”
The judge leaned forward and asked, “Have you any letters from the man you say is your son?”
The old man pulled a dirty letter out of his pocket, and handed it up with a bewildered look.
Young Mr. Pippitt still looked on with his fixed smile, while the judge read:
[112]
“Dear Father:
“It’s a bad job that you’re nabbed. Five years is no joke. Why were you such a fool? You were right about the name. Keep it quite dark, for God’s sake! I’ll see what I can do.
“Yours,
“J. P.
“Received your last all right.” ”

“ Dumergue had, in his [93] haste, called her “a little devil.” She looked it then.
“You mean,” she asked slowly, “that you will use force?”
I bowed.
“Then I yield,” she said, after a pause.
I called the maid, and told her to order the carriage in five minutes. The silence was unbroken till it came round. The princess went into her room, and returned in cloak and hat, carrying a large muff. She was smiling.
“Ah, Mr. Jason, what can a woman do, against men? I am ready. We will go alone. The servants can follow.”
I handed her into the coach, ordering the coachman to drive fast. ”

“ Middleton compromised. He said he understood that the lady was from Monte Carlo.
[185]
MY ASTRAL BODY.
There’s no doubt at all about it,” said the rajah, relighting his cigar.
“It’s perfectly easy, if you know how to do it. The skepticism of the West is nothing less than disgusting.”
The rajah had come to Oxford to complete his education and endue himself with the culture of Europe; and he sat in my rooms, in a frock-coat of perfect cut (he always wore a frock-coat) , smoking one of my weeds and drinking a whisky-and-soda. ”