George Bernard Shaw

“ HECTOR. They are too stupid to use their power.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER [throwing down his brush and coming to the end of the sofa] . Do not deceive yourself: they do use it. We kill the better half of ourselves every day to propitiate them. The knowledge that these people are there to render all our aspirations barren prevents us having the aspirations. And when we are tempted to seek their destruction they bring forth demons to delude us, disguised as pretty daughters, and singers and poets and the like, for whose sake we spare them. ”

“ MRS HUSHABYE. Desdemona would have found him out if she had lived, you know. I wonder was that why he strangled her!
ELLIE. Othello was not telling lies.
MRS HUSHABYE. How do you know?
ELLIE. Shakespeare would have said if he was. Hesione, there are men who have done wonderful things: men like Othello, only, of course, white, and very handsome, and—
MRS HUSHABYE. Ah! Now we're coming to it. Tell me all about him. I knew there must be somebody, or you'd never have been so miserable about Mangan: you'd have thought it quite a lark to marry him. ”

“ LADY UTTERWORD. Oh, is that you, Nurse? How are you? You don't look a day older. Is nobody at home? Where is Hesione? Doesn't she expect me? Where are the servants? Whose luggage is that on the steps? Where's papa? Is everybody asleep? [Seeing Ellie] . Oh! I beg your pardon. I suppose you are one of my nieces. [Approaching her with outstretched arms] . Come and kiss your aunt, darling.
ELLIE. I'm only a visitor. It is my luggage on the steps.
NURSE GUINNESS. I'll go get you some fresh tea, ducky. [She takes up the tray] .
ELLIE. But the old gentleman said he would make some himself. ”

“ THE CAPTAIN. So much the worse! When our relatives are at home, we have to think of all their good points or it would be impossible to endure them. But when they are away, we console ourselves for their absence by dwelling on their vices. That is how I have come to think my absent daughter Ariadne a perfect fiend; so do not try to ingratiate yourself here by impersonating her [he walks firmly away to the other side of the room] .
LADY UTTERWORD. Ingratiating myself indeed! [With dignity] . Very well, papa. [She sits down at the drawing-table and pours out tea for herself] . ”

“ THE WOMANSERVANT. Oh, you're invited, are you? And has nobody come? Dear! dear!
THE YOUNG LADY. A wild-looking old gentleman came and looked in at the window; and I heard him calling out, "Nurse, there is a young and attractive female waiting in the poop. Go and see what she wants." Are you the nurse?
THE WOMANSERVANT. Yes, miss: I'm Nurse Guinness. That was old Captain Shotover, Mrs Hushabye's father. I heard him roaring; but I thought it was for something else. I suppose it was Mrs Hushabye that invited you, ducky? ”

“ No tedious waiting to go to sleep at nights and wondering whether you will have a bad night. How delightful it makes waking up in the morning! How much better than the happiest dream! All life transfigured! No more wishing one had an interesting book to read, because life is so much happier than any book! No desire but to be alone and not to have to talk to anyone: to be alone and just think about it.
ELLIE [embracing her] . Hesione, you are a witch. How do you know? Oh, you are the most sympathetic woman in the world!
MRS HUSHABYE [caressing her] . Pettikins, my pettikins, how I envy you! ”

“ He looks straight into the eyes of an imaginary woman; seizes her by the arms; and says in a deep and thrilling tone, "Do you love me!" The captain comes out of the pantry at this moment; and Hector, caught with his arms stretched out and his fists clenched, has to account for his attitude by going through a series of gymnastic exercises.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER. That sort of strength is no good. You will never be as strong as a gorilla.
HECTOR. What is the dynamite for?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER. To kill fellows like Mangan.
HECTOR. No use. They will always be able to buy more dynamite than you. ”

“ THE CAPTAIN. You shall have some of my tea. Do not touch that fly-blown cake: nobody eats it here except the dogs. [He disappears into the pantry] .
NURSE GUINNESS. There's a man for you! They say he sold himself to the devil in Zanzibar before he was a captain; and the older he grows the more I believe them.
A WOMAN'S VOICE [in the hall] . Is anyone at home? Hesione! Nurse! Papa! Do come, somebody; and take in my luggage.
Thumping heard, as of an umbrella, on the wainscot. NURSE GUINNESS. My gracious! It's Miss Addy, Lady Utterword, Mrs Hushabye's sister: the one I told the captain about. ”

“ THE CAPTAIN [introducing Ellie] . His daughter. [He sits down on the sofa] .
ELLIE [protesting] . No—
Nurse Guinness returns with fresh tea.
THE CAPTAIN. Take that hogwash away. Do you hear?
NURSE. You've actually remembered about the tea! [To Ellie] . Oh, miss, he didn't forget you after all! You HAVE made an impression.
THE CAPTAIN [gloomily] . Youth! beauty! novelty! They are badly wanted in this house. I am excessively old. Hesione is only moderately young. Her children are not youthful.
LADY UTTERWORD. How can children be expected to be youthful in this house? ”

“ I had never known anything better, though I was unhappy, and longed all the time—oh, how I longed!—to be respectable, to be a lady, to live as others did, not to have to think of everything for myself. ”

“ MRS HUSHABYE. Yes, pettikins, I do. People don't have their virtues and vices in sets: they have them anyhow: all mixed.
ELLIE [staring at her thoughtfully] . There's something odd about this house, Hesione, and even about you. I don't know why I'm talking to you so calmly. I have a horrible fear that my heart is broken, but that heartbreak is not like what I thought it must be.
MRS HUSHABYE [fondling her] . It's only life educating you, pettikins. How do you feel about Boss Mangan now?
ELLIE [disengaging herself with an expression of distaste] . Oh, how can you remind me of him, Hesione? ”

“ May not Hesione be such a demon, brought forth by you lest I should slay you?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER. That is possible. She has used you up, and left you nothing but dreams, as some women do.
HECTOR. Vampire women, demon women.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER. Men think the world well lost for them, and lose it accordingly. Who are the men that do things? The husbands of the shrew and of the drunkard, the men with the thorn in the flesh. [Walking distractedly away towards the pantry] . I must think these things out. [Turning suddenly] . But I go on with the dynamite none the less. ”

“ MANGAN [following him to the half door] . What pirate's child? What are you talking about?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER [in the pantry] . Ellie Dunn. You will not marry her.
MANGAN. Who will stop me?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER [emerging] . My daughter [he makes for the door leading to the hall] .
MANGAN [following him] . Mrs Hushabye! Do you mean to say she brought me down here to break it off?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER [stopping and turning on him] . I know nothing more than I have seen in her eye. She will break it off. Take my advice: marry a West Indian negress: they make excellent wives. ”

“ She rises with an air of one who waits, and is almost at the end of her patience. She is a pretty girl, slender, fair, and intelligent looking, nicely but not expensively dressed, evidently not a smart idler. With a sigh of weary resignation she comes to the draughtsman's chair; sits down; and begins to read Shakespeare. Presently the book sinks to her lap; her eyes close; and she dozes into a slumber. An elderly womanservant comes in from the hall with three unopened bottles of rum on a tray. She passes through and disappears in the pantry without noticing the young lady. ”

“ MRS HUSHABYE. Well, why shouldn't my husband be a handsome man?
RANDALL [joining them at the window] . One's husband never is, Ariadne [he sits by Lady Utterword, on her right] .
MRS HUSHABYE. One's sister's husband always is, Mr Randall.
LADY UTTERWORD. Don't be vulgar, Randall. And you, Hesione, are just as bad.
Ellie and Hector come in from the garden by the starboard door. Randall rises. Ellie retires into the corner near the pantry. Hector comes forward; and Lady Utterword rises looking her very best. MRS. HUSHABYE. Hector, this is Addy. ”

“ We live among the Mangans and Randalls and Billie Dunns as they, poor devils, live among the disease germs and the doctors and the lawyers and the parsons and the restaurant chefs and the tradesmen and the servants and all the rest of the parasites and blackmailers. ”

“ MRS HUSHABYE. Take care, dear child. I don't believe any man can kiss Addy without falling in love with her. [She goes into the hall] .
HECTOR [striking himself on the chest] . Fool! Goat!
Mrs Hushabye comes back with the captain's cap. HECTOR. Your sister is an extremely enterprising old girl. Where's Miss Dunn!
MRS HUSHABYE. Mangan says she has gone up to her room for a nap. Addy won't let you talk to Ellie: she has marked you for her own.
HECTOR. She has the diabolical family fascination. I began making love to her automatically. What am I to do? I can't fall in love ”

“ But one of them married a numskull; HECTOR. [taking up the rhythm]
The other a liar wed;
MRS HUSHABYE. [completing the stanza]
And now must she lie beside him, even as she made her bed. LADY UTTERWORD [calling from the garden] . Hesione! Hesione! Where are you?
HECTOR. The cat is on the tiles.
MRS HUSHABYE. Coming, darling, coming [she goes quickly into the garden] .
The captain goes back to his place at the table. HECTOR [going out into the hall] . Shall I turn up the lights for you?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER. No. Give me deeper darkness. Money is not made in the light. ”

“ The hilly country in the middle of the north edge of Sussex, looking very pleasant on a fine evening at the end of September, is seen through the windows of a room which has been built so as to resemble the after part of an old-fashioned high-pooped ship, with a stern gallery; for the windows are ship built with heavy timbering, and run right across the room as continuously as the stability of the wall allows. ”

“ MAZZINI. I assure you you are mistaken.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER. An adventurous life; but what does it end in? Respectability. A ladylike daughter. The language and appearance of a city missionary. Let it be a warning to all of you [he goes out through the garden] .
DUNN. I hope nobody here believes that I am a thief, a pirate, or a murderer. Mrs Hushabye, will you excuse me a moment? I must really go and explain. [He follows the captain] .
MRS HUSHABYE [as he goes] . It's no use. You'd really better— [but Dunn has vanished] . We had better all go out and look for some tea. ”

“ Fancy your finding no one, and being neglected and abandoned. [Kissing her again] . My poor love! [She deposits Ellie on the sofa. Meanwhile Ariadne has left the table and come over to claim her share of attention] . Oh! you've brought someone with you. Introduce me.
LADY UTTERWORD. Hesione, is it possible that you don't know me?
MRS HUSHABYE [conventionally] . Of course I remember your face quite well. Where have we met?
LADY UTTERWORD. Didn't Papa tell you I was here? Oh! this is really too much. [She throws herself sulkily into the big chair] .
MRS HUSHABYE. Papa! ”

“ You may have drifted into it; but you will bounce out of it, my pettikins, if I am to have anything to do with it.
ELLIE [hopelessly] . No: it's no use. I am bound in honor and gratitude. I will go through with it.
MRS HUSHABYE [behind the sofa, scolding down at her] . You know, of course, that it's not honorable or grateful to marry a man you don't love. Do you love this Mangan man?
ELLIE. Yes. At least—
MRS HUSHABYE. I don't want to know about "at least": I want to know the worst. Girls of your age fall in love with all sorts of impossible people, especially old people. ”

“ On the port side of the room, near the bookshelves, is a sofa with its back to the windows. It is a sturdy mahogany article, oddly upholstered in sailcloth, including the bolster, with a couple of blankets hanging over the back. Between the sofa and the drawing-table is a big wicker chair, with broad arms and a low sloping back, with its back to the light. A small but stout table of teak, with a round top and gate legs, stands against the port wall between the door and the bookcase. It is the only article in the room that suggests (not at all convincingly) a woman's hand in the furnishing. ”

“ CAPTAIN SHOTOVER. Dunn's lost his muscle, but recovered his nerve. Men seldom do after three attacks of delirium tremens [he goes into the pantry] .
MRS HUSHABYE. I congratulate you, Mr Dunn.
MAZZINI [dazed] . I am a lifelong teetotaler.
MRS HUSHABYE. You will find it far less trouble to let papa have his own way than try to explain.
MAZZINI. But three attacks of delirium tremens, really!
MRS HUSHABYE [to Mangan] . Do you know my husband, Mr Mangan [she indicates Hector] .
MANGAN [going to Hector, who meets him with outstretched hand] . Very pleased. [Turning to Ellie] . ”

“ The natural term of the affection of the human animal for its offspring is six years. ”

“ He fights a desperate duel with an imaginary antagonist, and after many vicissitudes runs him through the body up to the hilt. He sheathes his sword and throws it on the sofa, falling into another reverie as he does so. ”

“ He must be greatly changed. Has he attained the seventh degree of concentration? ”