Lizzie Doten

“ The tears streamed down Hesper’s cheeks as he spoke. “O, Mr. Clyde!” she said earnestly, “believe me, although there is so much of deception in the worlds that you will find many, many women much better than my own poor self. There are many pure and faithful hearts filled with a never failing fountain of affection, scattered up and down in the world, but you will find that they scarce ever beat beneath silken garments and glancing jewels. Look for true love rather among those who serve humbly and suffer long, for the heart grows tender and truthful under the discipline of sorrow. ”

“ But when Mose came, and I read your letters, so tender, so thoughtful and kind, I longed to be good again, and to have you write such letters to me, only do not write as if I were your brother. O no: Hesper. We are what may be called a young man and woman now, therefore I would have you love me with a different love, which shall grow broader and deeper as time rolls on, and at length unite our hearts as one forever. Hesper, if you will be my guiding star, I shall learn to love all that is high, and noble, and worthy. ”

“ Clyde held her clasped hands in his own, and looked searchingly into her face.
“I know, you good, true soul,” he said, “that you would do thus, for it is precisely the turn which such natures as yours would take, but it would be a hard task for me.”
“It is always easier to advise than to do,” replied Hesper, “and especially in such cases—but Mr. Clyde,” she added, with great earnestness, “I believe you have a nature equal to any such thing, and that the reason of your disappointment, is because God has something better in reserve for you, than a union with a vain, false-hearted woman.” ”

“ Simple Johnny, the poor child of whom we have spoken, sat in the chimney corner, sobbing and crying as though his heart would break.
“Hush, hush!” said his father impatiently; but the poor child vainly strove to suppress his grief. It was but for a moment, and then it burst forth afresh. One could not wonder much, however, when the cause was known. The little porringer of bread and milk which Hesper had given him just before she went out, by an unlucky slip was overturned upon the hearth, and Fido—a little black dog, with drooping ears and white feet—was lapping it up in greedy haste. ”

“ There is a soft and chastened expression upon every feature, and in your eyes a deep, spiritual light, such as can only come through a long and trying discipline of sorrow. O Hesper, you and I both know what it is to pass under the shadow of a great and desolating grief, but your soul has come out chastened [249] and purified by the trial, while mine still lingers in darkness and unreconciliation. My very existence, as it creeps slowly onward, day by day, has become a wearisome burden—- for what is the future without hope, or life without love? ”

“ Now I think it is best for me to die, for if I grow up to be a man, I may become wicked and careless again, and I should never be ready to go. But let me tell now, Miss Hesper, while I am able, it is your love and kindness that makes me feel so happy, and I hope God will bless you for it forever and ever.”
Poor Hesper’s loving heart was so deeply moved by the boy’s earnestness, that she could not speak. She could only put her handkerchief to her face and weep like a child. ”

“ Years have intervened since then, but even now, in a pleasant cottage by the brook, where the spring flowers bloom earliest and the autumn leaves are last to fall, dwells Hesper, the Home Spirit, for her mission is not yet ended. Joyful little ones, with dancing feet and smiling countenances, come and go over the threshold, and he who chose that star of peace as the guide to his earthly pathway, still walks by her serene light, rejoicing in a “love that never faileth.” ”

“ Grimsby raised her checked apron and wiped away the tears which were flowing freely down her cheeks.
“There!” she said, as she started up with an effort to be cheerful, and drew her shawl around her, “I won’t be a child! but really, Hesper, I care more about such little things than any one would suppose.”
“Then don’t let that thought trouble you any longer” said Hesper, “but send Juliana and the boys to see me, and kiss little Tommy for me, for I shall always love you, and shall come to see you as soon as I am able.” ”

“ Hesper took their hands in her own, and looked steadily in their faces. She was very earnest, and her voice trembled, but she talked to them as only a loving and gentle hearted sister could. She told them, in simple words, of their father’s and mother’s sickness—of the weariness and hard labor of Mose, of the helplessness of little Johnny, of her own heavy trials, and then she told them very kindly, but so plainly they could not misunderstand, that now they were old enough to think of these things, and if they could not be of any assistance, they might, at least, try not to add to the trouble. ”

“ Aunt Betsey had stepped down from the wall, and now stood before them with her dress all in tatters, her arms akimbo, and her head thrust forward, looking the very picture of defiance.
“Woman!” said Mr. Byers, gravely, as he gave her a contemptuous poke with his cane—“I am ashamed of you! you are a disgrace to humanity in general, and your sex in particular. What is legally right is not always morally so; and for you, with your abundance, to steal peaches from a poor widow woman, is, to say the least, a sin in the sight of God, for which you have been justly punished.” ”

“ Hesper was quite at a loss what to do, when she came to the great door of the Rolling Mill. The dress of the workmen—the red light shining on their faces—the dazzling brightness from the furnaces, and the deep, gloomy blackness of the more remote parts of the building, all appeared so wild and strange, that she dared not enter. Every few moments the doors of the furnaces would be raised, and a large, glowing mass of red hot iron taken out, which was drawn quickly between rollers of various sizes. ”

“ Just then, Hesper wished that aunt Betsey was dead herself, or that she never could hear her speak again. He “a poor miserable creature!” Wouldn’t he always be a comfort and consolation to those who loved him, if he should live a hundred years? So she reasoned, and she could not see it otherwise; though when the first gush of sorrow was over, she felt that the doctor had spoken truly, and that the better world would give to the poor child, blessings and powers he never could enjoy below. ”

“ Aunt Nyna sat by her cheerful fire, reading from a large, old-fashioned book, which lay open on the stand before her. The house dog dozed in the chimney corner, the tea kettle was singing on the crane, and the little canary was fast asleep with his head beneath his wing. No sound broke the silence save the monotonous tick of the old clock, faithfully numbering the moments, which to one heart at least were full of blessing. ”

“ There was one, however, to whom this unexpected change was a cause of the deepest sorrow, and this one was aunt Nyna herself.
“Hesper, my dear girl!” she said, as she came one night, and putting her arm around her, drew her close to her bosom—“I had hoped one day to call thee my own child, but I feel it is ordered otherwise. Between thee and me, I will say, that I fear my Harry is not what he should be. God bless thee, dear one! I trust that He in whom there is neither variableness nor shadow of turning, hath reserved for thee better things.” ”

“ Time alone can heal the wound, and teach me that indifference which shall turn my heart to stone.”
“O no! no!” said Hesper, quickly, as she laid her hand upon his shoulder, and looked him earnestly in the face—“not to stone, for is there not much in the world to live for and enjoy, even though one particular affection cannot be gratified?”
Mr. Clyde shook his head seriously. “Put the question to your own heart,” he said. “An earnest, joyful love for the companion of your childhood, gladdens and inspires your whole being. ”

“ Upon entering the room she found Juliana seated beside her husband on the sofa, with her sleeping child in her arms. Harry’s arm was around her, and her head rested upon his bosom. He was very pale indeed, and it was evident that both had been weeping.
“Come hither, Hesper,” said Harry, in a voice tremulous with emotion, as he extended his hand towards her, “you see me here, completely conquered. Strong man as I am, I have become weak as a little child before this woman’s love. O Hesper! if there is anything that will save me from destruction, it is that!” ”

“ Circumstances have made me what I am, and given me this mask of formality, which I wear before the world, where curious eyes are ever ready to prey upon a bleeding heart, but before the never failing charity of your pure soul, I dare appear as I am. Not only must I thank you for your kindly services during my sickness, but also for saving me from an utter disbelief in woman’s truth and goodness, for when a man loses his faith in woman, the brightest star in the heaven of his existence is quenched. ”

“ She’s just like all the rest of the women—Lord bless ‘em! So good themselves they think everybody else is, and whoever they love, is next kin to perfection.”
“Harry is a good-hearted boy, though” said Mose thoughtfully.
“As good as a ripe October peach with a doubled kernelled pit in it, and generous as summer sunshine. But that is the great difficulty with him. He is too generous to say no, and goes in for a jolly time whenever he can have one. Nevertheless, I love him with all his faults, and really feel a fatherly solicitude for him. Not on his mother’s account, however. O, no, Mose! no! ”

“ She well knew that if she did this Hesper would take care of him, for she never could bear to hear him cry. Little Johnny, too, was very fond of him, and they would play together for hours. It was very interesting to see how the poor simple child and the feeble infant loved one another.
“They are very much alike,” Mrs. Greyson would say, as she watched them. “One is an infant in mind, and the other in body. God help my poor boy! He will never know what it is to grow in knowledge and wisdom, till he is born unto a better life.” ”

“ The Good Father, up there in heaven, cares nothing for the color of the skin. It is the heart alone he looks at, and therefore I shall do the same. We should all love one another in this world like brothers and sisters, Jake, so don’t turn away from me when I want to do you good, but I pray you, try my friendship a little while, and if it does not satisfy you then seek something better.”
Jake dropped his rabbit upon the ground, and looked up to her with tears in his eyes.
“Miss Hesper,” he said earnestly, “I believe you are a good angel, for nobody ever spoke so to me before. ”

“ Hesper’s eyes filled with tears and her lips quivered—“I don’t know sir,” said she, “but I think the Lord would care for us.”
“Poor, simple child!” said her father—“there are a great many people left to the care of the Lord, who perish miserably. Think of the fathers, and mothers, and little children, who die for want of bread, and of the wretched beings in our great cities, with scarce a mouthful of food and no shelter from the heat of summer, or the piercing cold of winter. Does the Lord care for them?” ”

“ Aunt Betsey was sister to Hesper’s father. Her husband was comfortably situated, and they had no children. They lived in a large, old-fashioned house, where everything was convenient, and there was no one to trouble them. She was one of the most precise, prudent, pains-taking women in the world, and was also very peculiar. Every part of her house was as neat as possible, and she never allowed any one, not even her husband, to change the place of a single thing. On the floor of her sitting room was a handsome, home-made carpet, of aunt Betsey’s own manufacture. ”

“ You are sitting in the sunshine of a great hope, and your whole future is radiant with the golden hues which your own soul casts before you. Tell me, should these hopes be disappointed, should this light go out in darkness, would you turn unmoved to the world, and find much there, even then, to make you happy? If so, then you have not the tender, sympathizing nature, which I had ascribed to you.”
For the first time did it cross Hesper’s mind, that such a shadow might fall upon her pathway, [203] and her deep sympathy for her friend made her feel how terrible it would be. ”

“ And then Mose told his whole conversation with Capt. Clark. He waited for his father to reply, but he did not. Mr. Greyson silently reached up for his hat, took his cane and went out. Hesper was so disappointed she could not speak. Mose thrust his old geography into his pocket with a vexed and angry movement.
“There!” said he, “I might have known it would be so! How foolish I was ever to have hoped for anything better! Now all I have to do is to go back to the mill again, and work like a slave till it kills me, which will not take long, and the sooner I die the better.” ”

“ Late one afternoon, as Hesper was returning home with simple Johnny, who had been spending the day with aunt Nyna, she was overtaken by Mrs. Grimsby. The poor woman looked very tired, for her day’s work had been hard. Under one arm she carried her old wash-gown, and on the other was a large basket of clothes she was taking home to iron.
“O dear,” she said, “I feel as though I could not take another step! I don’t believe there’s a slave at the South that has to work harder than I. But then I get my pay for it, and in these hard times that is a great comfort.” ”

“ But just then, Bose seemed to be no respecter of persons, and the only proof he gave of his goodness, was that of letting go of her [118] leg and seizing her by the dress, which he shook fiercely, rending and tearing it in the most shocking manner. Every thread which gave way, seemed to draw right from aunt Betsey’s heart, but there was no helping it. She attempted to conciliate Bose by patting him, but it rather appeared to increase his fury, and to all her terms of affection and endearment, he only answered by significant growls. ”