Molière

“ DORIMENE,: I was very glad, Sir, to be among the first to come to congratulate you upon rising to such a high degree of honor.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Madame, I wish your rosebush to flower all year long; I am infinitely obliged to you for taking part in the honors bestowed upon me; and I am very happy to see you returned here, so I can make very humble excuses for the ridiculous behavior of my wife.
DORIMÈNE: That's nothing. I excuse her jumping to conclusions: your heart must be precious to her, and it isn't strange that the possession of such a man as you should inspire some jealousy. ”

“ MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: They have got into a rage over the superiority of their professions to the point of injurious words and of wanting to come to blows.
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: What! Gentlemen, must you act this way? Haven't you read the learned treatise that Seneca composed on anger? Is there anything more base and more shameful than this passion, which turns a man into a savage beast? And shouldn't reason be the mistress of all our activities?
DANCING MASTER: Well! Sir, he has just abused both of us by, despising the dance, which I practice, and music, which is his profession. ”

“ MUSIC MASTER: I beg you to speak better of the excellence of music.
FENCING MASTER: You are amusing fellows, to want to compare your sciences with mine!
MUSIC MASTER: See the self-importance of the man!
FENCING MASTER: My little Dancing Master, I'll make you dance as you ought. And you, my little musician, I'll make you sing in a pretty way.
DANCING MASTER: Monsieur Clanger-of-iron, I'll teach you your trade.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: (To the Dancing Master) Are you crazy to quarrel with him, who knows tierce and quarte, and who can kill a man by demonstration? ”

“ MADAME JOURDAIN: (To Nicole) Will he never go?
NICOLE: They enjoy being together.
DORANTE: You took the right tack to touch her heart. Women love above all the expenses we go to for them; and your frequent serenades, your continual bouquets, that superb fireworks for her over the water, the diamond she has received from you, and the entertainment you are preparing for her, all this speaks much better in favor of your love than all the words you might have spoken yourself. ”

“ DORANTE: Let's have some wine for Monsieur Jourdain and for these gentlemen and ladies who are going to favor us with a drinking song.
DORIMÈNE: It is marvelous to season good food, by mixing it with music, and I see I am being admirably entertained.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Madame, it isn't . .
DORANTE: Monsieur Jourdain, let us remain silent for these gentlemen and ladies; what they have for us to hear is of more value than anything we could say. (The male singers and the woman singer take the glasses, sing two drinking songs, and are accompanied by all the instrumental ensemble.) ”

“ MADAME JOURDAIN: It's necessary for your daughter to have a husband who is worthy of her, and it's better for her to have an honest rich man who is well made than an impoverished gentleman who is badly built.
NICOLE: That's true. We have the son of a gentleman in our village who is the most ill formed and the greatest fool I have ever seen.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Hold your impertinent tongue! You always butt into the conversation. I have enough money for my daughter, I need only honor, and I want to make her a marchioness. ”

“ MUSIC MASTER: It's true that he understands them poorly, but he pays well, and that's what our art needs now more than anything else.
DANCING MASTER: As for me, I admit, I feed a little on glory. Applause touches me; and I hold that, in all the fine arts, it is painful to produce for dolts, to endure the barbarous opinions of a fool about my choreography. It is a pleasure, don't tell me otherwise, to work for people who can appreciate the fine points of an art, who know how to give a sweet reception to the beauties of a work and, by pleasurable approbations, gratify us for our labor. ”

“ MADAME JOURDAIN: Cléonte, don't lose courage yet. Follow me, my daughter, and tell your father resolutely that, if you can't have him, you don't want to marry anyone.
SCENE XIII (Cléonte, Covielle)
COVIELLE: You've made a fine business, with your pretty sentiments.
CLÉONTE: What do you want? I have a scruple about that which precedent cannot conquer.
COVIELLE: Don't you make a fool of yourself by taking it seriously with a man like that? Don't you see that he is a fool? And would it cost you anything to accommodate yourself to his fantasies? ”

“ You are a widow, and you answer only to yourself. I am my own master and I love you more than my life. Why shouldn't you be all my happiness from today onward?
DORIMÈNE: Goodness! Dorante, for two people to live happily together both of them need particular qualities; and two of the most reasonable persons in the world often have trouble making a union satisfactory to them both.
DORANTE: You're fooling yourself, Madame, to imagine so many difficulties, and the experience you had with one marriage doesn't determine anything for others. ”

“ COVIELLE: Her, sir? There's a pretty fool, a well made flirt for you to give so much love! I see only mediocrity in her, and you will find a hundred women who will be more worthy of you. First of all, she has small eyes.
CLÉONTE: That's true, she has small eyes; but they are full of fire, the brightest, the keenest in the world, the most touching eyes that one can see.
COVIELLE: She has a big mouth.
CLÉONTE: Yes; but upon it one sees grace that one never sees on other mouths; and the sight of that mouth, which is the most attractive, the most amorous in the world, inspires desire. ”

“ All the disorders, all the wars one sees in the world happen only from not learning music.
DANCING MASTER: All the misfortunes of mankind, all the dreadful disasters that fill the history books, the blunders of politicians and the faults of omission of great commanders, all this comes from not knowing how to dance.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: How is that?
MUSIC MASTER: Does not war result from a lack of agreement between men?
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: That is true.
MUSIC MASTER: And if all men learned music, wouldn't that be a means of bringing about harmony and of seeing universal peace in the world? ”

“ You and the wine arm each other, And I redouble my love for you both Let us three -- wine, you, and me -- Swear, my beauty, to an eternal passion.
Your lips are made yet more attractive by wetting with wine! Ah! The one and the other inspire me with desire And both you and it intoxicate me Let us three -- wine, you, and me -- Swear, my beauty, to an eternal passion.
SECOND DRINKING SONG
Let us drink, dear friends, let us drink; Time that flies beckons us to it! Let us profit from life as much as we can. Once we pass under the black shadow, Goodbye to wine, our loves ”

“ MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: In this way then, a man, without courage, is sure to kill his man and not be killed himself?
FENCING MASTER: Without doubt. Didn't you see the demonstration?
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Yes.
FENCING MASTER: And thus you have seen how men like me should be considered by the State, and how the science of fencing is more important than all the other useless sciences, such as dancing, music, ...
DANCING MASTER: Careful there, Monsieur swordsman! Speak of the dance only with respect. ”

“ Show respect to the Monsieur Mamamouchi.
MADAME JOURDAIN: Has he lost his mind? I must hurry to stop him from going out. Ah! Ah! This is the last straw! I see nothing but shame on all sides.
(She leaves.)
SCENE II (Dorante, Dorimène)
DORANTE: Yes, Madame, you are going to see the most amusing thing imaginable. I don't believe it would be possible to find in all the world another man as crazy as that one is. And then too, Madame, we must try to help Cléonte's plan by supporting his masquerade. He's a very gallant man and deserves our help. ”

“ MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Why always as shepherds? You see nothing but that everywhere.
MUSIC MASTER: When we have characters that are to speak in music, it's necessary, for believability, to make them pastoral. Singing has always been assigned to shepherds; and it is scarcely natural dialogue for princes or merchants to sing their passions.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Alright, alright. Let's see.
DIALOGUE IN MUSIC: (A Woman and Two Men)
ALL THREE: A heart, under the domination of love, Is always with a thousand cares oppressed. It is said that we gladly languish, gladly sigh ”

“ A wise man is above all the insults that can be spoken to him; and the grand reply one should make to such outrages is moderation and patience.
FENCING MASTER: They both had the audacity of trying to compare their professions with mine.
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: Should that disturb you? Men should not dispute amongst themselves about vainglory and rank; that which perfectly distinguishes one from the other is wisdom and virtue.
DANCING MASTER: I insist to him that dance is a science to which one cannot do enough honor.
MUSIC MASTER: And I, that music is something that all the ages have revered. ”

“ MUSIC MASTER: Let's see. . . This is good.
DANCING MASTER: Is it something new?
MUSIC MASTER: Yes, it's a melody for a serenade that I set him to composing here, while waiting for our man to awake.
DANCING MASTER: May I see it?
MUSIC MASTER: You'll hear it, with the dialogue, when he comes. He won't be long.
DANCING MASTER: Our work, yours and mine, is not trivial at present.
MUSIC MASTER: This is true. We've found here such a man as we both need. This is a nice source of income for us -- this Monsieur Jourdain, with the visions of nobility and gallantry that he has gotten into his head. ”

“ MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: I'll learn it then. But I don't know when I can find time; for besides the Fencing Master who's teaching me, I have also engaged a master of philosophy who is to begin this morning.
MUSIC MASTER: Philosophy is something; but music, sir, music . . .
DANCING MASTER: Music and dancing, music and dancing, that's all that's necessary.
MUSIC MASTER: There's nothing so useful in a State as music.
DANCING MASTER: There's nothing so necessary to men as dancing.
MUSIC MASTER: Without music, a State cannot subsist.
DANCING MASTER: Without the dance, a man can do nothing. ”

“ MUSIC MASTER: I agree, and I enjoy them as you do. There is surely nothing more agreeable than the applause you speak of; but that incense does not provide a living. Pure praises do not provide a comfortable existence; it is necessary to add something solid, and the best way to praise is to praise with cash-in-hand. He's a man, it's true, whose insight is very slight, who talks nonsense about everything and applauds only for the wrong reasons but his money makes up for his judgments. ”

“ COVIELLE: Alabala crociam acci boram alabamen.
CLÉONTE: Catalequi tubal ourin soter amalouchan.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: See?
COVIELLE: He says that the rain of prosperity should water the garden of your family in all seasons.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: I told you that he speaks Turkish!
DORANTE: That's wonderful.
SCENE V (Lucile, Monsieur Jourdain, Dorante, Dorimène, etc.)
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Come, my daughter; come here and give your hand to the gentleman who does you the honor of asking for you in marriage.
LUCILE: What! Father, look at you! Are you playing in a comedy? ”

“ MADAME JOURDAIN: As for me, it's a thing I'll never consent to. Marriages above one's station are always subject to great inconveniences. I have absolutely no wish for a son-in-law who can reproach her parents to my daughter, and I don't want her to have children who will be ashamed to call me their grandmother. If she arrives to visit me in the equipage of a great lady and if she fails, by mischance, to greet someone of the neighborhood, they wouldn't fail immediately to say a hundred stupidities. ”

“ FIRST MAN: There is nothing so sweet as the loving fires That make two hearts beat as one. One cannot live without amorous desires; Take love from life, you take away the pleasures.
SECOND MAN: It would be sweet to submit to love's rule, If one could find faithful love, But, alas! oh cruel rule! No faithful shepherdess is to be seen, And that inconstant sex, much too unworthy, Must renounce love eternally. ”

“ MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Is that what people of quality do?
MUSIC MASTER: Yes, Sir.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Then I'll have them. Will it be fine?
MUSIC MASTER: Without doubt. You must have three voices-- a tenor, a soprano, and a bass, who will be accompanied by a bass-viol, a theorbo, and a clavecin for the chords, with two violins to play the ritournelles.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: You must also add a trumpet marine. The trumpet marine is an instrument that pleases me and it's harmonious.
MUSIC MASTER: Leave it to us to manage things. ”

“ I find you all very impertinent to speak with this arrogance in front of me, and impudently to give the name of science to things that one should not even honor with the name of art, and that cannot be classified except under the name of miserable gladiator, singer, and buffoon!
FENCING MASTER: Get out, you dog of a philosopher!
MUSIC MASTER: Get out, you worthless pedant!
DANCING MASTER: Get out, you ill-mannered cur!
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: What! Rascals that you are ... (The philosopher flings himself at them, and all three go out fighting) .
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Monsieur Philosopher! ”

“ MUSIC MASTER: When the dance is combined with the music, it will have even better effect, and you will see something quite good in the little ballet we have prepared for you.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: That's for later, when the person I ordered all this for is to do me the honor of coming here to dine.
DANCING MASTER: Everything is ready.
MUSIC MASTER: However, sir, this is not enough. A person like you, who lives magnificently, and who are inclined towards fine things, should have a concert of music here every Wednesday or every Thursday. ”