various contributors

“ Here is the most masterly portraiture of a woman utterly without imagination or heart or anything except a kind of futile and worthless attraction, that I remember to have met for some time. As I say, it is all rather astonishing from Mr. Calthrop. The men who love Flip, and whose lives are ruined by her, are easier to understand. About Sir Timothy Swift, for example, there is a touch of the Harlequin, or rather Pierrot, that betrays his origin. I will not tell you the story, for one reason because its charm is too elusive to retrieve. ”

“ Then suddenly rushing forward and throwing its whole weight against the nearest wheel of the cannon it would tilt it from its foundation and fling it headlong to irretrievable destruction, very likely pinning several members of the gun company among its ruins.
If it is objected that the strength of an average rabbit would be unequal to the task, are there not, I would ask, strong rabbits among rabbits, just as there are strong men among men? ”

“ I asked. "I've never that convened one before."
"What matter the time!" said James grandly. "The mills may grind slowly, but they grind exceeding small."
"Quite so. But in about an hour and a quarter the guard is changed; and if, as is probably, the man who insulted me is then on guard himself, he will have the rifle. And if he has the rifle, I don't quite see how we are going to shoot him."
"You mean he mightn't give it up?"
"Yes. It would be rank insubordination, I admit, but in the circumstances one would not be surprised at his attitude."
"That is a good point," said James. ”

“ He is acting as the central link which makes the continuance of the social life possible to us. For I do not think that we could have undertaken (with our deplorable ignorance of French) to entertain Belgian refugees at all had he not been staying with us. As it is, it works beautifully, though Madame Mercier and her two daughters speak no English, for Sinclair's French is perfectly adequate.
It was during his absence that we learned that my neighbour, Andrew Henderson, the dairy farmer, had also taken in a Belgian—a woman who was to work on the farm during the winter. ”

“ No one talks anything but War nowadays—and the papers contain nothing but War news. Even the Men's Dress Columns have disappeared. I can tell you it has caused the greatest inconvenience to me personally. You may wonder why I am manicuring myself. I'll tell you why. My manicurist—the only man in London who knew how to manicure—turned out to be a beastly German or Austrian or something, and has gone off to his beastly War. ”

“ He steals and lies and poses; he betrays most of his friends; and throughout a varied life he only really cares for one person—himself. Yet Miss Elinor Mordaunt never seems to have any difficulty in making us share Bellamy's delight in his own conscienceles career. Perhaps it is this very delight that does the trick. Charlatan as he is, and worse, Bellamy is always so attractively amused at the success of his impostures that it becomes impossible to avoid an answering grin. ”

“ Madame Mercier seemed to be much amused.
"We have decided to adjourn," said Sinclair. The truth is, we were not getting on at all. It looks as if you will have to come too."
"I was always afraid there were weak spots in you, after all, Sinclair," said the Reverend Henry. "It does not surprise me. You are all right in table French or even in domestic, railway or restaurant French, but as soon as we get outside of your beat into agricultural French—"
"It isn't that," said Sinclair. "I'm all right. It's that confounded fellow, Henderson. ”

“ Leisurely approaching the object of attack, lulling the suspicions of a dull-witted sentinel or patrol by stopping now to cull a leaf, now to wash a whisker, the well-trained rabbit would have no difficulty in creeping to within striking distance. ”

“ It is now said that not infrequently a German band is made to play when the enemy's infantry advances to attack.
⁂
A regrettable mistake is reported from South London. A thoroughly patriotic man was sat upon by a Cockney crowd for declaring that the Kaiser was a Nero.
⁂
Servia, The Times announces, will in future be called Serbia in our contemporary's columns. We would suggest that in the same way Bavaria might be called Babaria.
⁂
All German soldiers are close-cropped. To show, apparently, that they have the courage of the conviction they deserve. ”

“ Because what he does not know about The Sex, and has not already written in a galaxy of engaging romances, is hardly worth the bother of remembering. So that his views on the matter naturally command respect. Wonderful Woman is perhaps less a novel than an analysis—painfully close, with a kind of regretful brutality in it—of one special type of femininity, and a glance at several others. ”

“ Sinclair was full of zeal and set off next day after breakfast. From the drawing-room window we watched his triumphant entry into the farm yard at the foot of the hill. But he came back in a dejected frame of mind.
"She's called Suzanne," he told us, and she's quite a nice-looking sort and she handles a turnipcutter like an expert; but she talks nothing but Flemish."
"We might have thought of that," said the Reverend Henry. "Still, I daresay they'll manage all right."
"On the contrary," said Sinclair. "Henderson sent Suzanne to get the letters last night. ”

“ Why, for instance, should not rabbits be trained to upset siege guns? The innocent and docile character of the creatures would be a valuable asset in work of this nature. Even if seen—and among grass or undergrowth on a dark night a rabbit of ordinary intelligence might reasonably hope to escape detection—their real purpose might be cleverly masked until it was too late. ”

“ Dawburn-Jones with a gun or the officer would have been in as great peril as in the trenches. How it will end I can scarcely image. I like to picture a great day of victory. Then, if the Crown Prince be allowed to take up his abode on parole in some quiet suburban home, I am sure "The Hollies" will snap him up. And if "The Hollies" secures the Crown Prince no power in this world can prevent Mrs. Dawburn-Jones from securing the Kaiser. ”

“ Sportsman and dealer in general stores, his habit of hanging vaguely about Zulu kraals and Zulu impis, on nodding terms with just anybody, did not greatly increase my pride of race, notwithstanding the statement made to him by Mameena: "I shall never love another man as I love you, however many I marry." ”

“ The suitability of parrots for use in warfare is obvious. Their especial duty would be to give misleading words of command at points of critical importance during a battle. A stealthy night attack might be converted into a hasty "strategic retirement" by an observant parrot ingratiating itself among the enemy's ranks and raising the cry, "Up, Guards, and at 'em!" ”

“ The Germans have had a bright new idea, and are calling us a nation of shopkeepers. Certainly we have been fairly successful so far in repelling their counter attacks.
⁂
"GERMAN PIES SHOT."
Times. Sound policy this. The enemy cannot fight without his commissariat.
⁂
A well-known Floor Polish firm has issued a notice declaring that it is entirely a British concern. However, we shall not complain of their dealing with an alien enemy if they care to supply a little of it for the benefit of German manners. ”

“ The first object of the efficient trainer would be, of course, to select suitable rabbits.
Surely something too might be done with white mice? By gnawing through the tent ropes of a sleeping enemy—especially on wet and stormy nights—they would engender a sense of strain and insecurity among our opponents that could not be without an appreciable influence on their temper and moral throughout the campaign. ”

“ I am convinced we are going to win. No good could ever come to a man who wears an out-of-date moustache like the Kaiser... Oh, certainly I am in favour of the War. Why, I have just ordered several pairs of khaki spats... ”

“ Jack, though a shade arrogant at times, is a stimulating figure, human both in his weakness and his strength; and Mr. Snowden deserves more than a little gratitude for the care with which he has reproduced the atmosphere of times that were conspicuously lawless and exciting.
When Dicky Furlong, the brilliant and aspiring artist of The Achievement (Chapman and Hall) who was in love with Diana Charteris, sloshed her husband, Lord Freddy, over the head with his own decanter (vide Chap. XXI.) he rather overdid it. ”

“ Really, it's very hard to see how discipline can be maintained. I almost wish now that I wasn't a temporary noncommissioned officer. As a private one simply has the time of one's life, telling corporals all day long to go and boil their heads. ”

“ ANOTHER "SCRAP OF PAPER."
["The Times" of October 1st vouches for the following Army Order issued by the German Kaiser on August 19th: "It is my Royal and Imperial Command that you concentrate your energies, for the immediate present, upon one single purpose, and that is that you address all your skill and all the valour of my soldiers to exterminate first the treacherous English and walk over General French's contemptible little Army."]
Wilhelm, I do not know your whereabouts.
The gods elude us. ”

“ But Herbert did not look behind him And why not? It is impossible to say. Suffice it that he didn't. Nay, that is exactly what Herbert did see when he looked behind him. "My God," said he, turning pale..."
"Can we dine with the Monroes on Tuesday?" asked Cecily.
"That depends a good deal on whether they invite us," I answered.
"It's only Jack trying to be funny," Cecily told the receiver.
As I was saying," continued Herbert, "it's James MacClure." ”

“ Such is the power of the make-up (I am told) that a man of fifty could easily be arranged to look sufficiently like a man of half his age, at any rate without imperilling the success of the entertainment from the point of view of the spectator. And of course the girls will remain in all their charm, since girls cannot enlist. ”

“ You mustn't imagine that it is only those who fight who are helping. What about the women who are left behind? I help amuse 'em—keep 'em bright. I'm 'carrying on.' I'm not of your panicky sort. It's just as well that there should be a few men like me left in town. ”

“ They have husbands, these amiable ladies, but the husbands are mainly concerned with the commissariat and supply department, and are neither allowed nor designed in the actual fighting line.
The very day the war began, a huge flagstaff with a Union Jack of proportionate size rose in the grounds of Dulce Domum. It must have been ordered in advance. I present this fact to the German Press Bureau as showing that, at any rate, Mrs. Dawburn-Jones always intended war. But the next day Mrs. Studholm-Brown went six feet better with a flag-staff and three square yards better with a Union Jack. ”

“ Becomes a Dr. Jekyll dog once more
And homeward goes serene and dignified.
AT THE PLAY.
"Mameena."
Those who are not in the mood just now for a whole evening of exotic melodrama might look in at the Globe Theatre about 9.15, and derive a few moments' distraction from a Zulu wedding dance. I found it a better show than anything I have ever seen in the native compounds at Earl's Court. The company, of course, was mixed, but the white contingent had caught the local colour (coffee) and showed great aptitude in imitating the methods of the aborigines. Naturally there were conventions ”

“ Recently discovered, by German research, to have been of Teutonic birth.
Julius Kaiser. General Hercules. Johanna von Arkstein. Wilhelm Schakespear. Franz Drakenberg. Dr. Johannssohn.
"An official telegram from Nish received in London states that the Servian commanders agree that the enemy all along the front is employing explosive bullets. Every soldier carries 20 per cent. of explosive cartridges."
Daily Graphic. The fact that 80 per cent. of Austrian cartridges refuse to explode may account for the Austrian "victories." ”