Suzanne

“ It could by no manner of human possibility have been anyone else but Suzanne. No other girl in all the world would be gallivanting around in public at midday in a wetly revealing bathing suit. No one but Suzanne would have come alone, unheralded and uninvited, into the bachelor abode of the very man who loved her with such devotion as comes but once to any man. ”

“ Duchess. Oh, the Professor! Yes, Bellac. You told me that. You think no woman can follow his lectures without falling in love with him?
Mme. de Céran. But Suzanne hasn’t missed a single lecture, Aunt, and she takes notes and corrects them and copies them—I tell you Suzanne is in earnest. And while he is speaking she never takes her eyes off him; she drinks in every word. And you think that is all for the sake of science! Nonsense, it isn’t the science she loves, it’s the scientist. That is as plain as day. You have only to watch her when she’s with Lucy. She is dreadfully jealous. ”

“ It is true that Suzanne and I love each other very dearly, as we have always loved each other, though how much we did not know till this morning. Now, I am a waif and a castaway whom you have nurtured, and have neither lands nor goods of my own, therefore you may well think that I am no match for your daughter, who is so beautiful, and who, if she outlives you, will inherit all that you have. ”

“ Well, look you, Suzanne, I have won you by craft and blood, and by craft and blood I will keep you. Here you are in my power, here Heaven itself could not save you from me, in Bull-Head’s secret krantz which none know of but some few natives. Choose, therefore; forget the sins that I have committed to win you and become my wife willingly, and no woman shall ever find a better husband, for then the fire and the tempest will leave my brain and it will grow calm as it was before I saw you. ”

“ Before me I have a future the most modest and humble. I am the wife of Joseph the gardener; but poor and humble as is my present lot, I would not exchange it for the brilliant past, hidden from me by a veil of blood and tears. Some day I will write and send you my history; for I want to make it plain to you, Suzanne, that titles and riches do not make happiness, but that the poorest fate illumined by the fires of love is very often radiant with pleasure."
We remained mute. I took Alix's hand in mine and silently pressed it. Even Suzanne, the inquisitive Suzanne, spoke not a word. ”

“ I sank back in an easy-chair, startled by my own flippancy. The uncanny, inexplicable change that had made me what I was must not be revealed to Suzanne! Was it not enough that I had already driven my maid to the very verge of hysteria? And here I sat, talking recklessly to keep awake, and wearing my secret on my sleeve. Should Suzanne learn the truth from my punning tongue, her mind might become unhinged. In that case, another sudden transposition of identities might take place! Frightful possibility! I must not yield to the inclination creeping over me to indulge in a short nap. ”

“ But Suzanne—why, if she had no doubts or anxieties, should she find attunement of mood and landscape here?
I saw nothing when I approached along the motor road at the crest. It was instinct alone that prompted me to leave my car at a certain point and hurry over the brow of the hill to the little flat space which lies below it, fronting the sea as through an open window, in what I think as the most beautiful picture in all the world, framed in the giant trees that hang upon the very rim. ”

“ She knew that our hour had come.
“Suzanne!” I whispered again; for now I had her hands in mine, and had drawn her up, so that we stood there in the most ancient and admirable spot of all our continent, alone. And what went forward among the silent cypresses was, I take it, the most ancient and admirable thing in all our universe.
I turned her face to mine. In the clear air I could see deep into her eyes—deep blue eyes—unfathomable as yonder sea. Eyes that at last looked into mine, without doubt or resentment or uncertainty. ”

“ Suzanne had made her entrance into society three years before, and danced ravishingly. Not so with me. I had attended my first ball only a few months before, and had taken nearly all my dancing-lessons from Suzanne. What was to become of me, then, when I heard my father ask me to dance the bolero which he and Alix were playing!... Every one made room for us, crying, "Oh, oui, Mlle. Suzanne; dancez! Oh, dancez, Mlle. Françoise!" I did not wish to disobey my father. I did not want to disoblige my friends. Suzanne loosed her red scarf and tossed one end to me. ”

“ Suzanne was my sheet-anchor. It is true that I could not consider her attitude to the elopement very sound: it was indeed far too lenient; but I seemed to be surrounded by old women with advanced sympathies (perhaps all old women at heart side with love’s rebels?) , and Suzanne’s profound affection for Rose’s mother could not but make her careful over the little girl.
But as we get older we become more self-protective; so I gave no promise, but shook hands with Eustace and said that I would think it all over and let him know in the morning what I decided. ”

“ His tones grew sweet and full—
“O, Nicanor! let this strange new shadow between us be dispelled, at once and for ever. I love Mademoiselle Suzanne, Nicanor.”
“I love Mademoiselle Suzanne, Miguel.”
“Very well. Then I yield her to you.”
“O, pardon me, Miguel! but that is just the point. I wanted to save you the pain—the sense of self-renunciation; but your blindness confounds me. More people know Tom Fool than Tom Fool knows. Your infatuation for Mademoiselle Suzanne is very plain to very many. What is plain only to yourself is that Mademoiselle Suzanne returns your devotion. ”

“ Suzanne. To kill him? (Puts her arms around his neck) How nice you are! Then you thought—?
Roger. Let’s not say any more about that, it’s all over, forgotten, the past is dead. Let’s begin all over again: from my arrival—How are you, Suzanne? How are you, dear? It’s been so long since I’ve seen you! Come to me, dear, the way you used to! (He seats himself with her beside him)
Suzanne. Oh, Roger, how nice you are! What lovely things you say! You love me better than you love her, then?
Roger. (With feeling) Love you! But isn’t it my duty to love you? As a relative, as a tutor, as an honest man? ”

“ Suzanne had small compassion. Though she thoroughly enjoyed the stimulus of the society of the other sex and dearly loved to clash swords with them she wished nothing at their hands. She meant to show the world that a woman could stand alone, strive and conquer alone, fail if need be, alone, sufficient unto herself unto the end. ”

“ Suzanne was extraordinarily pretty, much prettier, in fact, than was at all necessary for a young person of distinct literary bent and a pronounced--audibly pronounced--distaste for matrimony. Thus Nature, willfully prodigal, lavishes her gifts. ”

“ Then, after a long pause, laying her hand on Philippe's arm, she said to him, in words that corresponded strangely with the thoughts that troubled him:
"Do not be angry with me, dear, and, above all, do not judge me too severely. There is a Suzanne in me whom I do not know well ... and who often frightens me.... She is capricious, jealous, wrong-headed, capable of anything ... yes, of anything.... The real Suzanne is good and sensible: 'You're my daughter to-day,' papa used to say to me, when I was a little girl. ”

“ I am afraid I'll never do anything very big, Suzanne. You and Barb are going to leave me way behind, I know. I haven't any special ambition except to be happy myself and to make other people within my range happy, too."
"You are a genius at that. Remember what Mr. Kinnard said. Don't let Suzanne tease you, Sylvia. You have the secret of living. If all the people in the world wanted to be happy themselves and tried to see that other people near them were happy, why--"
"The millennium would have come," finished Suzanne. ”

“ He saw Suzanne again, amiable, gracious, smiling, looking at him with her soft, dark eyes; Suzanne approving of his conduct and saying to him: "You are a man of courage. Let us go away together; cast your frock into the ditch."
And he wrote three letters: one to his uncle, the other to the Comtesse, and the third to the Bishop, entreating them to excuse him, and telling them that he did not feel qualified to perform his ministry in a large town. He implored Monseigneur to leave him at Althausen and to think no more about him. ”

“ Now Suzanne, who till this moment had been as one stupefied, seemed to gather up her strength and answered him calmly, saying:
“Truly, husband, things appear to be as you say, though what we have done that they should be so, I cannot tell. Still comfort yourself, for death comes to all of us soon or late, and whether it comes soon or late makes little difference in the end, seeing that come it must.” ”

“ It will only make the poor child terribly uneasy. It is a splendid moonlight night, and I will go out into the garden and satisfy myself that everything is all right."
"Go out into the garden!" cried Suzanne, in great alarm. "Don't think of such a thing. It would be very dangerous, I am sure."
"That is all nonsense, my dear Suzanne," said Cloarek, turning toward the door. "You are as great a coward as Thérèse."
"First, let me go and wake Segoffin, monsieur," pleaded Suzanne. ”

“ I do not wish to try and excuse her, but she repented; and how far more worthy of respect is the repentance of certain fallen women than the haughty virtue of certain others.
And, perceiving that she found no excuse for her fault, Suzanne tried to deceive herself by exalting above measure the worth of the man who had ruined her.
—He is no ordinary man after all, she said to herself, and we do not love the man we wish. It does honour to the heart to repose its love rightly. ”

“ You do not answer? For in truth, sir, the parts are strangely altered, and if I am ashamed of it for myself, I blush still more for your sake. But since you are so careful of your future and of your fortune, I am come to tell you this: I am rich, sir, do not then fear anything, do not dread poverty; I have inherited from an aunt, who leaves me enough to provide me with a husband. But what I want is a father for my child....
—Mademoiselle, dear and fondly-loved Suzanne, yes, ever fondly-loved Suzanne, I am full of confusion and remorse ”

“ Your daughter is adorable, as her mother was before her and is. And now, dear lady, since matters have run so fast. I can't help making it still plainer, why I came here. I came because I had to come! And I can't help saying now to her mother that even though I never should see Suzanne again, there will be no other woman, ever, in all the world for me. That's why I came tonight. ”

“ For goodness' sake, Suzanne, don't begin so early to meditate on these terrible things. Give yourself a few years in which to see the world. I don't ask you to marry, but you may meet some man whom you could love very much, and who would love you. If you were to go and throw yourself away under some such silly theory as you entertain now, without stopping to see, or waiting for life to show you what it has in store, what will you have to offer him. Suzanne, Suzanne"—Suzanne was turning impatiently to a window—"you frighten me! ”

“ The entire panorama of the mountains was beautiful, well nigh as free of change from God's original imprint as when the first adventurers came hither to tell of a region of miracles.
I loved it all, as I always had. But now I saw it in a haze even under the brilliant illumination of the sun, not yet old. Although I had not forced my company upon Suzanne when she left, I found my feet now following hers down the walk she had taken; so I came to the parade ground which makes the civic center at Yellowstone. ”

“ And Suzanne, who returned very thoughtful, said once: "The Curé! can it be?
It is the Curé then."
LXI. LE PÈRE HYACINTHE. "She still preserved for herself that little scene; thus, little by little, we accumulate within ourselves all the elements of the inner life."
EMILE LECLERCQ (Une fille du peuple) .
She had shown Marcel the portrait of her beloved Rose. "Yes, she is very pretty," he had replied, "but I prefer dark girls ..." Suzanne blushed. He opened his breviary and drew out a card. ”

“ He is a man as we reckon in this country, and he does not wish to leave us any more than we wish him to go. Moreover, he loves Suzanne, and Suzanne loves him, and I believe that the God who brought them together at first means them to be husband and wife, and that such love as they bear to each other will give them more together than any wealth or rank can bring to them apart. Therefore I say, husband, let our son, Ralph, stay here with us and marry our daughter, Suzanne, decently and in due season, and let their children be our children, and their love our love. ”

“ Stop!" and Commines, smiling through his gravity, followed the other's gesture so that the two stood face to face, locked the one to the other at arm's length.
How like the lad was to Suzanne: a man's strong likeness of a woman's sweet face. There were the same clear expressive eyes, ready to light with laughter or darken with sympathy; the same sensitive firm mouth and squared chin, fuller and stronger as became a man and yet Suzanne's in steadfastness to the life ”

“ She had her hair high under her hat; and now she was rolling up her bathing-suit in one paper after another, at the table. Her attitude toward me had changed once more. It was disapproval she showed, when she swept another gaze about the room.
“Women!” she exclaimed. “Women! Is that all a man thinks about, then?”
“Yes, Suzanne, it is,” said I, “until he finds the one woman. ”