William H Walling

“ The man may be by nature kind, considerate, and loving, but the whole tenor of his thoughts and experiences on this subject are connected with violence—indeed, dynamic consummation is, as he falsely believes, the true idea of mercy. And with this disparity between the forces—shrinking timidity and ungoverned boldness—the match anticipated by Juliet, is won and lost. Lost indeed for the poor creature left mangled and terrified—nay, infinitely disgusted! Love, affection even, are well-nigh crushed out of the stricken woman, whose mental ejaculation, "O, that I had not married!" ”

“ It is the pernicious custom to accord to these favored beings all the rights of solitude and retiracy that they could reasonably expect if the marriage ceremony had actually transpired. Except a private bed-room, they are as secluded whenever they may choose to be so, as any married couple could wish. "With closely drawn curtains, and with doors either locked or sacred from intrusion, they pass the "wee sma' hours ayont the twal'" in learning the details of passion, and too often its entire mysteries, to the detriment of their physical, and the utter ruin of their moral health. ”

“ The fierce and indomitable energy of the American people, which has survived the most mighty social and political revolution of this world, must and will have some fiery excitement with which to occupy itself; and, having amused itself with the labor and the Colonial questions, it has seized upon the bauble of Woman's Rights, and bids fair to dignify it into a terrible engine of destruction. ”

“ In attempting to map out the rights and wrongs of the relations that exist between human beings, and which govern their life, health, intellect, love, power, happiness, usefulness and honor, we cannot avoid a feeling of responsibility, a desire and absolute determination to record nothing without careful investigation and due consideration — and yet an equal desire to hold back nothing that can give them a proper understanding of themselves. ”

“ The world is full of maxims which demonstrate the truth of this. "If a woman hesitates, she is lost;" "C'est le premier pas qui coute;" and this sentiment is multiplied into all languages, held by all nations. Such is the universal sentiment of mankind, and all history shows that the more innocent a girl may be, at heart, the more sure is she to fall if she surrender the advance guards of her honor. ”

“ Education, considered in its largest sense, has the mission of rendering the youth of both sexes beautiful, healthful, strong, intelligent and honest. Thus it comprehends such physical and moral training as shall most surely conduce to these objects. We have but to glance around us at the dwarfed, miserable, sickly specimens of feminine humanity, which really constitute the rule rather than the exception, to observe at once how far short of the attainment of these ends is our system as actually conducted. The very name of youth should imply beauty, strength, vivacity, and integrity. ”

“ The mere discussion of such a revolution as a possibility, the bare toleration of the idea, is sufficient in itself to injure the mind and to operate powerfully upon the imagination of these impressionable creatures—to excite in them feelings of indignation and dissatisfaction with their present condition. Every argument that ingenuity can suggest, is brought to bear in assuring them that they are deprived of certain inherent "rights" by an unjust and tyrannical age. ”

“ Nourished by languishing glances and fanned by more intimate association on the journey to and from school, fed by stolen interviews and openly arranged festivities, stimulated by the prurient gossip of the news-paper and the flash novel, the gallant of twelve years is the libertine of fourteen. That this picture is not overdrawn every experienced physician will bear witness. Revelations are rare; instances of detection are extremely infrequent; so liberal are the opportunities afforded, and so blind are those whose duty it should be to guard. ”

“ In these monstrous alliances, whether we consider the reciprocal situation of the parties thus abusively joined, or the kind of progeny which is likely to result from them, we are equally moved with disgust and compassion. Admitting, for an instant, that which is seldom true, that the union has been concluded with the free and voluntary consent of the young girl, and that no undue pressure has been exerted over her wishes, it must nevertheless occur that reflection and experience will lead too late to bitter regrets, so much the more poignant that they will be without remedy. ”

“ Alas! for the old dotard who dares to drink of this enchanted cup I Nature will assuredly avenge herself most cruelly for her violated laws. "It is better to be an old man's darling than a young man's slave" is a proverb which reveals the corruption of our manners, and the stupid infamy which makes of the nuptial couch an arena of debauch as detest- able as the very slums of vice. ”

“ In our country, however, it is second in frequency—though not, surely, in importance —only to the crime of libertinism. It is encountered in all ages, from the infant in the cradle to the old man groaning upon his pallet. But it is from the age of fourteen to twenty that its ravages are most frequent and most deplorable. Nothing but a sense of inexorable duty, in the hope of effecting a radical reform by awakening the alarm of parents and teachers to the enormous frequency and horrible consequences of this revolting crime, could induce the author to enter upon the sickening revelation. ”

“ Far from friends and kindred, with no sympathizing one to whom she can tell a word of her strange sorrow, with him who is miscalled her protector, revealing, by his every look and act, the bestial thoughts which fill his breast, what wonder is it that twenty-four hours of marriage have been more prolific to her of loathing than the whole previous courtship of love! ”

“ Something should always be held in reserve, no less of her capacity for bestowing and receiving enjoyment, than of her personal and peculiar charms. The imagination should always be left to occupy itself in depicting those treasures which it has enjoyed but never beheld; and thus the husband will remain the lover, and courtship continue until death do them part. Drapery but enhances the estimation in which men hold the female attractions of person, and the rustle of a woman's garment is more potent to charm them than the lavish exposure of the proportions of a Venus. ”

“ All medical authorities agree that nothing is more calculated to exalt sensibility, to sensualize the heart, and expose the nervous system to the most fatal perturbations than a luxurious and voluptuous education. This, remember well, O parents! is the concentrated wisdom of the experience of every age and country; not the unsupported opinion of any one man however brilliant his genius, and that, in science, there is no difference whatever on this topic. ”

“ Let nothing interfere with your determination to wait for and obtain entire reciprocity of thought and desire, and let this always be your guide, not only during the honey-moon, but also throughout your married existence. Thus will you secure not only happiness and love for yourself, but that perfect confidence and gratitude from your wife which shall make her literally a sharer in your joys, as she must needs be in your sorrows. ”

“ Marriage, then, properly regulated, exerts a powerfully beneficent influence upon the individual, and consequently upon private manners. Unlike the bachelor, whose leading characteristics are selfishness, narrowness of views, eccentricity, and obstinacy, the married man allies himself more closely to the grand interests of society, is animated by sentiments of right and justice, readily submits to the authority of law, shares in the general happiness, and holds aloof from visionary contemplations and sterile reveries. ”

“ In conclusion we have to consider marriage in another point of view, that is to say, aesthetically. It has been said that "man does not live by bread alone." He has not only physical, but intellectual and moral wants which no less imperiously require satisfaction. He has not only the right, but the duty of seeking this satisfaction under the penalty of sinking to the level of the brute, and of failing in the accomplishment of his destiny. The sentiment of art causes him to seek the beautiful and the good. In all that he fashions he aims at perfection ”

“ Croesus, a gentleman of high notions and exclusive tastes, has a family of lovely and beautiful daughters, who receive their gentlemen friends a la mode. One is an exquisitely moulded being, whose highly-wrought and sensuous nature imparts a charm to her manners which has rendered her an object of great attention, and early brought around her hosts of fashionable striplings, indeed all whose social rank could procure them an entrance to the spacious drawing-rooms of old Croesus. ”

“ Reforms are needed—none can be more sensible of this fact than we—and the remedy can be applied by woman; this we not only concede, but claim. But it is as woman, as wife, as mother that she must do the work: as woman, to soften asperities, and to refine what else were coarse and brutal ”

“ Then let us have our daughters educated as women, and not as men. Let us have them trained for the duties of the household and the nursery, and the sweet enchantments of the domestic hearth. "Be that you are—that is, a woman; if you be more, you're none." ”

“ It is here that science beautifully and legitimately comes to her aid, determines with accuracy the exact moment that the young life has taken its flight, and on the instant proceeds boldly to an operation which, a moment earlier, would have been murder. ”

“ She finds, to her infinite disgust, that she is "as ladies (used to) love to be, who love their lords." She must gire up the office or the nursery. Who can doubt what her choice will be if she has already broken down her morality by employing the usual political intrigue? Indeed, with female suffrage "political intrigue" will gain a new and even a worse significance than it now enjoys. It will certainly prove an additional and very powerful danger for woman's chastity.
Undoubtedly the special destiny of woman is to be wife and mother. ”

“ A true and happy marriage, wherein we see the husband's and the wife's love for each other increase from day to day, where they grow to even strongly resemble one another—where the offspring is blessed by a healthy body and mind; where true and congenial wedlock exists; where sorrow and poverty only more strongly rivet the ties that bind them—this—this state of married happiness, which should and could be enjoyed by nearly all, is unfortunately the exception and not the rule. ”

“ Those who persist will surely die the death most horrible of all deaths; and those who practice the most limited and most occasional acts of onanism will surely be punished in proportion to their crimes; while the very individuals who seem to escape, are those who most surely carry the punishment for the remainder of their lives, never live to attain old age, and most frequently fall victims to some grave chronic disease, the germs of which they owe to this detestable vice. ”

“ We merely allude to them as proving that there is a recognized danger to health of parents and life of offspring in the least departure from the rule of continence during gestation. The legitimate object of the sexual act being absent, no physiological end can be subserved, and the practice is, therefore, against nature, and consequently injurious. "To make love at all times is what distinguishes man from other animals," says Beaumarehais; and, in fact, with all other animals the condition of pregnancy is sacred from masculine approaches. ”

“ There is no medicine known to the profession which possesses the specific property of inducing miscarriage; many will do it in some cases, but only secondarily; that is, in proportion as they shatter the constitution, ruin the health, and produce a state of the system which renders it incompetent, through debility, to sustain pregnancy. Medicines, then, are out of the question if a man loves his wife, and values her health or her happiness. ”

“ Assure her most positively that her apprehensions are groundless, that no consummation shall occur this night, or, indeed, at all, until on that, as you trust on all other subjects, your wishes and hers shall exactly harmonize; above all, inform her that whenever your happy marriage shall be consummated, neither violence nor suffering shall attend it, but perfect and reciprocal happiness shall crown the act. You should know that gentleness, moderation, but more than all, due and reasonable cultivation of her womanly passion will enable you to fulfill your pledge to the very letter. ”

“ You wish to live as long as possible, and with the least possible suffering — difficult solution of the grand problem of life. Well, renounce that which is no longer in harmony with your age, temperament, and forces. ”