François de Salignac de La Mothe- Fénelon

“ When these absurdities are even committed without any premeditated passion, they, at least, savour strongly of vanity, and betray an unbridled desire to please. Does this variety justify, before God and man, so rash and scandalous a conduct, and so likely to be imitated by others? This blind passion of pleasing, is it conformable to a christian character, which should consider every thing as idolatrous, that perverts the love of God, and kindles the contempt of his creatures? When such giddy female characters strive to please—what is their real object? Is it not to excite the passions of men? ”

“ Of all the qualities which children possess, there is but one on which you can calculate with certainty, and that is, good sense: this "grows with their growth," provided it be well cultivated. The graces of infancy fade away—its vivacity diminishes—and that tenderness of heart even becomes blunted, in proportion as the passions and an intercourse with designing men harden young people on their entrance into the world. Strive, therefore, to discover midst the graces of childhood, whether the disposition you have to manage be deficient in curiosity, and insensible of honest emulation. ”

“ Praise that instruction which nourishes the soul and causes it to expand: esteem those great truths which animate it to become wise and virtuous. Despise luxury of diet and dress, and every thing which enervates the body: make them sensible how much honour, a good conscience, and [136] religion, are above these sensual pleasures. By the force of such sentiments, without reasoning upon the body and the soul, the ancient Romans taught their children to despise the body, and to sacrifise it to every thing which could inspire their minds with the pleasure of virtue and glory. ”

“ It is certain that a bad education works less ill in a male, than in a female breast; for the vices of men often proceed [24] from the bad education which their mothers have given them, and from passions which have been instilled into them at a riper age, from casual intercourse with women.
What intrigues does history present to us—what subversion of laws and manners—what bloody wars—what innovations in religion—what revolutions in states—all arising from the irregularities of women? Ought not these considerations to impress us with the importance of female education? ”

“ Fashion, however, soon destroys itself: it is perpetually aiming at perfection, and never finds it; at least, it never stops when it has found it. It would be reasonable enough if all changing and alteration were to cease after having found perfection, comprising both elegance and utility: but to change for the sake of changing, appears very much like sacrificing true politeness and good taste to inconstancy and confusion! Fashions are frequently founded on mere caprice. Women are the sole arbitrators of them ”

“ They appear at first interesting, because there is attached to early youth a certain fascinating lustre which covers every thing: we, at first, perceive nothing but what is tender and amiable, and this prevents a closer examination of the features of the mind. Every sally of their wit surprises us, because we do not expect it at such an age: every error in judgment is permitted, and it has, moreover, the charm of ingenuity: they assume a certain vivacity of deportment, which never fails to pass for sprightliness and intellect. ”

“ The society of a mother, who narrowly watches, scolds, and thinks [27] she is performing her duty in not overlooking the least fault—who is never satisfied, but always trying the temper, and appears herself immersed in domestic cares; all this disgusts and torments her. She is, moreover, surrounded with flattering servants, who, seeking to insinuate themselves, by base and dangerous compliances, gratify all her fancies, and direct her conversation to every topic but that of goodness and virtue. To her, piety appears an irksome task—a foe to every rational amusement. ”

“ If, instead of terrifying the minds of young people with absurd notions of ghosts and spirits, which serve only to weaken and disturb the still delicate texture of the brain: if, instead of abandoning them to the caprice of a nurse for what they are to like or dislike, we endeavoured always to impress on their minds an agreeable idea of good, and a frightful one of evil—this foresight might hereafter be the foundation of every practical virtue. ”

“ Tell a child that God is truth itself—that it is mocking him when we jest at truth in our discourse—which should be precise and correct, and should consist in few words, that truth be not violated.
Be on your guard not to imitate those who applaud children, when they have discovered sharpness of intellect by some finesse. Far from supposing these tricks pretty and diverting, check them severely—and manage it so, that all their artifice may end unsuccessfully, and experience at last may disgust them with it. ”

“ When you have repeated one fable, wait till you are asked to begin another—thus leaving the child hungry, as it were, for more mental food. When curiosity is at last excited, recount certain choice histories, but in as few words as possible: connect them together, and postpone the sequel from one day to another, so that you keep the children in suspense, and impatient to know the termination. Be animated and familiar in your manner of repeating—make the personages speak—and children, who have a lively imagination, will fancy they hear and see them. ”

“ Never rebuke a child in the first moments of passion, whether on your side or hers. If on yours, she will perceive that, you conduct yourself according to caprice and resentment, and not according to reason and affection: you will, in consequence, irretrievably lose your authority. If you correct in the first gust of her passion, her mind is not sufficiently collected to confess her fault, to conquer her feelings, and to acknowledge the importance of your advice: such a mode may even hazard your pupil's respect for you. ”

“ Overlook the faults of a child in her first attempts at these things, and sacrifice something in order that she may ultimately gain instruction. Make her sensible, in a mild manner, of what she should have said or done, to avoid the inconveniencies into which she has been betrayed. Relate to her what has happened to yourself, and be not anxious to suppress faults, similar to her own, which you committed when young. Thus will you inspire her with confidence; without which, all education is but a formal wearisome task. ”

“ Finish your remarks by observing that the soul is weak and miserable, when abandoned to the direction of the body; which, like a furious horse, would hurl it down a precipice. Relate, also, that the beauty of the body, or external person, is like a flower which blossoms in the morning, and withers and is trod under foot in the evening—but that the soul is the express image of the immortal beauty of God. ”

“ At the same time, avoid the excess of politeness and propriety. When propriety is within moderation, it is a virtue; but when we consult too much our own tastes and fancies, it is converted into a littleness of mind. Good taste rejects excessive delicacy: it treats little matters as little ones, and is not hurt at any unpleasant consequences resulting therefrom. Ridicule, before children, those knick-knacks and gewgaws, of which some women are prodigiously fond, and which lead them insensibly into unwarrantable expenses. ”

“ First follow the method of scripture. Strike their imaginations in as lively a manner as possible—propose to them nothing which may not be clothed with sensible images. Represent God as seated on a throne—with eyes more brilliant than the rays of the sun, and more piercing than the lightning—represent him with ears that hear every thing; with hands that support the universe; with arms always stretched out to punish the wicked; and with a tender and paternal heart to make those happy who love him. ”

“ Those whose fame consists only in their beauty, soon become ridiculous: they approach, without perceiving it, to a certain age in which their charms begin to fade; still, however, indulging the dear delusion of self-gratification, when the world has long ago been disgusted with their vanity. In short, it is as unreasonable to be attached solely to beauty, as to concentrate all merit in strength of body ”

“ In such a state of lassitude, a young [28] woman abandons herself to pure idleness; and idleness, which may be termed a languor of the soul, is an inexhaustible source of weariness and discontent. She sleeps one-third more than is necessary to preserve her health: this protracted slumber serves only to enervate and render her more delicate; more exposed to the turbulency of passion; whereas moderate sleep, accompanied with regular exercise, produces that cheerfulness, vigour, and elasticity of spirits, which form, perhaps, the true criterion of bodily and mental perfection. ”

“ While reason, integrity, and virtue, have any influence on the human character, while practical good is acknowledged to be superior to plausible theory, so long shall the luminous and illustrious divines of the English Church rise above all the pretensions of fanatical and self-inspired teachers, who turn the word of God into craft, and use the name of Jesus with their lips, while their hearts are estranged from him. ”

“ Never consider their questions as importunate; they are overtures which nature makes to facilitate instruction—shew them, therefore, that you take pleasure in these questions—for, by such means, you teach them insensibly how every thing is made, which conduces to the comfort of man, and extension of commerce. By degrees, and without any particular study, they become acquainted with every article that is useful, and with the price affixed to each, which is, indeed, the true foundation of economy. ”

“ All that you can do for children who are under your regulation is, to accustom them to such a simple life as has been just described; to fortify them in such habits as long as you can, to make them foresee the evil consequences attached to other amusements, and not to abandon them to themselves; as is too commonly the case, at an age when their passions begin to be shewn, and when, consequently, they stand in need of greater restraint.
It must be allowed, that of all the vexations incidental to education, none can be compared with that which is experienced in the rearing of a stupid child. ”

“ But the most difficult truth for a child to comprehend is, that we have a soul more precious than our body. Children are at first accustomed to talk about the soul; and the custom is advantageous—for this language, which they do not understand, is perpetually exciting them to have a (confused) notion of the distinction of body and soul, until they are able really to conceive it. In proportion as early prejudices are pernicious when they lead to error, so are they useful when they conduct the imagination to truth, until reason is gradually directed towards it by the force of principles. ”

“ As to her person, she is perhaps too well instructed in the knowledge of that: every thing induces her to flatter, adorn, and idolise it. An essential point is gained if you can inspire her with contempt for it, by observing something of greater value about her.
Say then to a child who is capable of a little reasoning—Is it your soul that eats? If she answers absurdly, do not be harsh with her—but tell her mildly that the soul does not eat—It is the body that eats—the body, which resembles the brutes. Have brutes intellect—are they learned? ”

“ Watch every moment, each day, when correction may be well-timed. Never tell her of a fault, without, at the same time, suggesting some mode of redressing it, which will induce her to put it in practice; for nothing is more to be avoided than that chagrin and discouragement which are the consequence of mere formal correction. If a child is discovered to be a little rational, I think you should win it insensibly to wish to have its faults disclosed, as this would be the way of making it sensible of them, without causing affliction: never, however, recount too many faults at a time. ”

“ This indolence and stupidity makes a child negligent and disgusted with every thing she does. She is in such a case, that the best mode of education runs a risk of miscarrying, if we do not guard against the evil, from earliest infancy. Many people who have little depth of penetration, conclude, from this bad success, that nature does every thing in the formation of men of merit, and education nothing—instead of remarking that there are dispositions, like barren soils, on which cultivation produces little. ”

“ If the world has been their dupe in some single action, it will not continue so during the whole of their lives: oftentimes they are the dupes of those whom they wished to deceive: for there is sometimes an appearance of being dazzled by them, and they think themselves beloved—at the very moment, perhaps, when they are despised. At least they cannot prevent suspicion—and can any thing be more contrary to the rational interests of a prudent woman, than to see herself always suspected? ”