Hannah Webster Foster

“ Wealth, with its attendant train of splendid forms and ceremonies, courted her attention, and every species of dissipating amusement, sanctioned by the name of pleasure, beguiled the hours and charmed the imagination of the noviciate. Each enchanting scene she painted to herself in the brightest colours; and her experienced heart promised her happiness without allay. Flattery gave her a thousand charms which she was hitherto unconscious of possessing, and the obsequiousness of the gaudy train around raised her vanity to the highest pitch of arrogance and pride. ”

“ And how painful the necessity of being constrained, for the sake of peace, to witness in silence, and without even the appearance of disapprobation, the most shameful outrages upon religion and virtue! May you never taste the bitterness of this evil.
Intemperance is a vice, which one would imagine no lady would overlook in a suitor. But, strange to tell! there are those even among our own sex, who think and speak of inebriation in the other, at the jovial and well furnished board, as a mark of conviviality and good fellowship. ”

“ But let no ideas of your own endowments, however just, elate you with an opinion of your superior powers of pleasing.
“Be not ostentatious of your charms, either of person or mind. Let modesty, diffidence, and propriety regulate you, in regard to each. Exalted advantages will render you an object of envy to the weak minded of your own sex, and of satire to the ill-natured part of the other. Never obtrude even your real graces and accomplishments upon the world. The penetrating and judicious will see and applaud them, while retiring from the gaze of a misjudging and misrepresenting throng. ”

“ Early in life, Flirtilla was taught that her charms were irresistible; that she might aspire to an absolute ascendency over the hearts and passions of her votaries. A superficial, but fashionable education added the allurements of art to those of person, and rendered her a finished coquette.
“Her beauty and the gaiety of her manners gained her numerous admirers, who swarmed around, like the insect tribe, eager to sip the fragrance of the equally fair and fading rose. The incense of flattery, in every form, was her tribute. ”

“ But when you are addressed by a person of real merit, who is worthy your esteem and may justly demand your respect, let him be treated with honor, frankness and sincerity. It is the part of a prude, to affect a shyness, reserve, and indifference, foreign to the heart. Innocence and virtue will rise superior to such little arts, and indulge no wish which needs disguise.
“Still more unworthy are the insidious and deluding wiles of the coquette. How disgusting must this character appear to persons of sentiment and integrity! how unbecoming the delicacy and dignity of an uncorrupted female! ”

“ In the shady bower we enjoy either the luxury of solitude, or the pleasures of society; while you are, the whole time, in the midst of hurry and bustle. Eager in the chase, you fly from one scene of dissipation to another; but the fatigue of this ceaseless round, and the exertion of spirits necessary to support it, render the objects of pursuit tasteless and insipid.
Which mode of life, yours or mine, do you now think the most rational, and productive of the greatest happiness? The boarding school, which you affect to despise, has, it is true, formed my taste ”

“ I do not wish to pursue study as a profession, nor to become a learned lady; but I would pay so much attention to it, as to taste the delights of literature, and be qualified to bear a part in rational and improving conversation. Indeed, I would treasure up such a fund of useful knowledge, as may properly direct my course through life, and prove an antidote against the vexations and disappointments of the world. I think, Sophia, that our sex stand in special need of such a resource to beguile the solitary hours which a domestic station commonly imposes. ”

“ The daring spirit of Captain Smith, and the prudence, policy and magnanimity of his conduct to the treacherous natives, and to his equally treacherous and ungrateful countrymen, exhibit an example of patriotism and moderation, which at once commands our applause, and interests our feelings. While we tremble and recoil at his dreadful situation, when bending his neck to receive the murderous stroke of death, the native virtues of our sex suddenly reanimate our frame; and with sensations of rapture, we behold compassion, benevolence, and humanity, triumphant even in a savage breast ”

“ Nor can you be justified in suffering a blind passion, under whatever pretext, to involve you in those embarrassing distresses of want, which will elude the remedies of love itself, and prove fatal to the peace and happiness at which you aim.
“In this momentous affair, let the advice and opinion of judicious friends have their just weight in your minds. Discover, with candor and frankness, the progress of your amour, so far as is necessary to enable them to judge aright in the cause; but never relate the love tales of your suitor, merely for your own, or any other person’s amusement. ”

“ To beauty of person she superadds delicacy, sensibility, and every noble quality of the mind. Respectful to her superiors, affable, cheerful, and polite to her equals, and condescendingly kind to her inferiors, Florella is universally esteemed, beloved and admired. Of the pleasing accomplishments of music and dancing she is a consummate mistress. Yet she is superior to the vain arts of flattery, while the dignity of conscious virtue raises her far above the affectation of false modesty and diffidence. ”

“ Do not those who attempt it always fail, and render themselves disgusting? Do they not really injure what they strive to mend; and make it more indifferent than usual, when divested of its temporary embellishments? Beauty cannot possibly maintain its sway over its most obsequious votaries, unless the manners and the mind unitedly contribute to secure it. How vain then is this subterfuge! It may deceive the eye and gain the flattery of the prattling coxcomb; but accumulated neglect and mortification inevitably await those who trust in the wretched alternative. ”

“ Her powers of mind have been so happily improved, that she is able to discuss every subject with ease and propriety. To an enlarged understanding and a cultivated taste, to an extensive knowledge of the world and an acquaintance with polite literature, she superadds those amiable virtues, which give society its highest relish; while the elegance of her manners and the modesty of her deportment are a proof of the greatness of her mind, and render her esteemed, beloved, and respected by all who know her. ”

“ I am bold to affirm that every woman, by behaving with propriety on all occasions, may not only resist temptation, but repel the first attempts upon her honor and virtue.
That levity of deportment, which invites and encourages designers, ought studiously to be avoided. Flattery and vanity are two of the most dangerous foes to the sex. A fondness for admiration insensibly throws off their guard, and leads them to listen and give credit to the professions of those who lie in wait to deceive. ”

“ Pleasure is the most alluring object which is presented to the view of the young and inexperienced. Under various forms it courts our attention; but while we are still eager in the pursuit, it eludes our grasp. Its fascinating charms deceive the imagination, and create a bower of bliss in every distant object.
But let us be careful not to fix our affections on any thing, which bears this name, unless it be founded on virtue, and will endure the severest scrutiny of examination. ”

“ So often, my dear Maria, has the pen of the divine, the moralist, and the novelist been employed on the subject of female frailty and seduction; and so pathetically has each described the folly and misery of the fatal delusion which involves many in disgrace, that I am astonished when I see those, who have the best means of information, heedlessly sacrificing their reputation, peace and happiness to the specious arts of the libertine! ”

“ But an envious temper is, of all others, the most degrading and miserable. Envy is a malignant poison, which rankles in the heart, and destroys the inward peace, even while there is an outward appearance of serenity. That mind, which cannot rejoice in the happiness of others, is capable of very little in itself. To look with a grudging and evil eye on the enjoyments of our neighbor, must be a source of perpetual chagrin and mortification. ”

“ Elvira is present to every occasion. The superintendence of her family, and the education of her children is her delight. Capable of instructing them in every needful branch of science, and of furnishing them with every requisite endowment, she is, at once, their guide, their example, and their friend. When her husband returns from the cares and fatigues of business, with what becoming ease and cheerfulness does she dissipate the anxiety which sometimes hangs upon his brow, and exhilarate his spirits by the enlivening charms of rational and refined conversation! ”

“ And when these enlivening principles are united, they form the basis of durable happiness. But let not the mask of friendship, or of love, deceive you. You are now entering upon a new stage of action where you will probably admire, and be admired. You may attract the notice of many, who will select you as objects of adulation, to discover their taste and gallantry; and perhaps of some whose affections you have really and seriously engaged. The first class your penetration will enable you to detect; and your good sense and virtue will lead you to treat them with the neglect they deserve. ”

“ Does not a change of scene and situation contribute to the happiness of life? The natural love of this variety seems wisely implanted in the human breast; for it enables us to accommodate ourselves with facility to the different circumstances in which we are placed. I believe that no pleasures make so deep an impression on the memory, as those of the first and most innocent period of our lives. With what apparent delight do persons, advanced in years, re-trace their puerile feats and diversions! ”

“ Maturely weigh every consideration for and against, and deliberately determine with yourselves, what will be most conducive to your welfare and fidelity in life. Let a rational and discreet plan of thinking and acting, regulate your deportment, and render you deserving of the affection you wish to insure. This you will find far more conducive to your interest, than the indulgence of that romantic passion, which a blind and misguided fancy paints in such alluring colors to the thoughtless and inexperienced. ”

“ Temptations lurk around to beguile your feet astray; and dangers which appear insurmountable will often arise to affright you from the ways of virtue.
“But remember that a crown of honor and happiness awaits the undeviating pursuit of truth and duty. Let religion be your guide, and discretion your handmaid. Thus attended, you will escape the snares of youth, and surmount the perplexing cares of more advanced age. At your entrance on the stage of action, the allurements of pleasure will spread innumerable charms to court your acceptance. ”

“ Never suffer your eyes to be charmed by the mere exterior; nor delude yourselves with the notion of unconquerable love. The eye, in this respect, is often deceptious, and fills the imagination with charms which have no reality. Nip, in the bud, every particular liking, much more all ideas of love, till called forth by unequivocal tokens as well as professions of sincere regard. Even then, harbor them not without a thorough knowledge of the temper, disposition and circumstances of your lover, the advice of your friends; and, above all the approbation of your parents. ”

“ True, we have no plays. We are not obliged by fashion, to sit, half suffocated in a crowd, for the greater part of the night, to hear the rantings, and see the extravagant actions of the buskin heroes, (and those not always consistent with female modesty to witness!) We have no card-parties, avowedly formed for the purpose of killing time! But we have an agreeable neighborhood, among which we can easily collect a social circle; and persons of taste, politeness and information, compose it. ”

“ Flattery is a dazzling meteor, which casts a delusive glare before the eye; and which seduces the imagination, perverts the judgment, and silences the dictates of sound reason. Flattery is, therefore, the poison and bane of the youthful mind. ”

“ Ladies of delicacy and refinement will not countenance or support a conversation, which gentlemen of sense and sentiment can disapprove. As each were formed for social beings, and depend on the other for social happiness, I imagine that society receives its greatest charm from a mutual interchange of sentiment and knowledge.
“Both sexes are reciprocal instruments of each other’s improvement. The rough spirit of the one is tempered by the gentleness of the other, which has likewise its obligations to that spirit. ”

“ Few, you should remember, have had the advantages which you have enjoyed; and still fewer have your penetrating eye, correct taste, and quick sensibility. Let charity then draw a veil over the foibles of others, and candor induce you to look on the best and brightest side.
It is both our duty and interest to enjoy life as far as integrity and innocence allow; and in order to this, we must not soar above, but accommodate ourselves to its ordinary state. We cannot stem the torrent of folly and vanity ”

“ Your superiors will esteem you for your respectful treatment of them; your equals will love you for your kindness and familiarity; your inferiors will respect you for your condescension and meekness.
“Attention in company will be advantageous to yourselves. Like the industrious bee, which sips honey from every plant, you may derive some benefit or instruction from all kinds of society. Some useful remark or information; some sentiment which may allure you to the practice of virtue, or deter you from a vicious perpetration, may repay your labor, and be serviceable through life. ”

“ With due deference to those better judges, who despise the simplicity of our ancestors, and labor to introduce the corrupt manners and customs of the old world into our country, I cannot but think it extremely ridiculous for an independent nation, which discards all foreign influence, glories in its freedom, and boasts of its genius and taste, servilely to ape exotic fashions, even in articles of dress and fanciful ornaments. ”