author:Matthew Prior

“ Knowledge misunderstood is not at all better Sense than Understanding misunderstood, though 'tis confest the Author can play with words so well, that this and twenty such will pass off at a slight reading.
There are other Mistakes which could not be brought in, for they were too gross for Bayes himself to commit. 'Tis hard to conceive how any Man could censure the Turks for Gluttony, a People that debauch in Coffee, are voluptuous in a mess of Rice, and keep the strictest Lent, without the Pleasures of a Carnival to encourage them. ”

“ Bayes.Why thy Head's running on the Mouse again; but I hope a Church may be alone, tho' the Members be encreased, mayn't it?
Johns.Certainly Mr. Bayes, a Church which is a diffusive Body of Men, can much less be said to be alone.
Bayes.But are you really of that Opinion? Take it from me, Mr. Johnson, you are wrong; however to oblige you, I'll clap in some Simile or other, about the Children of Israel, and it shall do.
Smith.Will you pardon me one Word more, Mr. Bayes? What could the Mouse (for I suppose you mean her now) do more than range in the Kingdoms, when they were her own? ”

“ Bayes, this Mouse is strangely alter'd, since she fear'd no Danger.
Bayes.Godsokers! Why no more she does not yet fear either Man or Beast: But, poor Creature, she's afraid of the Water, for she could not swim, as you see by this.
Pag. 30.
Nor durst approach, till with an awful Roar
The Soveraign Lyon had her fear no more.
But besides, 'tis above thirty Pages off that I told you she fear'd no Danger; and I'gad if you will have no Variation of the Character, you must have the same thing over and over again; 'tis the Beauty of Writing to strike you still with something new. ”

“ There's a tender Expression, Birds of Beasts: 'tis the greatest Affront that you can put upon any Bird, to call it, Beast of a Bird:Pag. 129. and a Beast is so fond of being call'd a Bird, as you can't imagine.
These Birds of Beasts, these learned Reas'ning Mice,
Were separated, banish'd in a trice.
Who would be learned for their sakes, who wise?
Ay, who indeed? There's a Pathos, I'gad, Gentlemen, if that won't move you, nothing will, I can assure you: But here's the sad thing I was afraid of. ”

“ Well there's an end of the Entertainment; and Mr. Smith, if your Affairs would have permitted, you would have heard the best Bill of Fare that ever was serv'd up in Heroicks: But here follows a Dispute shall recommend it self, I'll say nothing for it. For Dapple, who you must know was a Protestant, all this while trusts her own Judgment, and foolishly dislikes the Wine; upon which our Innocent does so run her down, that she has not one word to say for her self, but what I put in her Mouth; and I'gad, you may imagine they won't be very good ones, for she has disoblig'd me, like an Ingrate. ”

“ Johns.Are you never afraid of a drubbing for that daring of your Noble Genius?
Bayes.Afraid! Why, Lord, you make so much of a Beating, I'gad 'tis no more to me than a Flea biting. No, No, if I can but be witty upon 'em, let 'em 'en lay on, I'faith, I'll ne'er baulk my Fancy to save my Carkass. Well, but we must dispatch, Mr. Smith. ”

“ Let Turks, Jews and Infidels, look to themselves, he has already begun the War upon them. When once a Conqueror grows thus dreadful, 'tis the Interest of all his Neighbours to oppose him, for there is no Alliance to be made with one that will face about, and destroy his Friends, and like a second Almanzor, change Sides meerly to keep his hand in ure. ”

“ Smith, if these two Lines don't recompence your stay, ne'er trust John Bayes again.
Hard things at the first Blush are clear and full,
Pag. 15.God mends at second thoughts, but Man grows dull.
I'gad, I judge of all Men by my self, 'tis so with me, I never strove to be very exact in any thing but I spoil'd it.
Smith.But allowing your Character to be true, is it not a little too severe?
Bayes.'Tis no matter for that, these general Reflections are daring, and savour most of a Noble Genius, that spares neither Friend nor Foe. ”

“ I was once translating a very good French Author,Varillas. but being something long about it, as you know a Man is not always in the Humour; What does this Jack do, but puts out an Answer to my Friend before I had half finished the Translation: so there was three whole Months lost upon his Account. ”

“ Prethee Mr. Johnson, remember little Bayes, when next you see a Presbyterian, and take notice if he has not Predestination in the Shape of his Ear: I have studied Men so long. I'll undertake to know an Arminian, by the setting of his Wig.
His predestinating Ears. I'gad, there's ne'er a Presbyterian shall dare to show his Head without a Border: I'll put 'em to that Expence.
Smith.Pray Mr. Bayes, if any of 'em should come over to the Royal Party, would their Ears alter?
Bayes.Would they? Ay, I'gad, they would shed their Fanatical Lugs, and have just such well-turn'd Ears as I have ”

“ But come, Gentlemen, let us return to our Business, and here I'll give you a delicate Description of a Man.
Smith.But how does that come in?
Bayes.Come in? very naturally. I was talking of a Wolf and that supposes a Wood, and then I clap an Epithet to't, and call it a Celtic Wood: Now when I was there, I could not help thinking of the French Persecution, and I'gad from all these Thoughts I took occasion to rail at the French King, and show that he was not of the same make with other Men, which thus I prove.
The Divine Blacksmith in th' Abyss of Light,Pag. 15. ”

“ Bayes.I'gad so it had: And then I'll tell you another thing, 'tis not every one that reads a Poem through. And therefore I fill the first part with Flowers, Figures, fine Language, and all that; and then I'gad sink by degrees, till at last I write but little better than other People. And whereas most Authors creep servilely after the Old Fellows, and strive to grow upon their Readers; I take another Course, I bring in all my Characters together, and let 'em see I could go on with 'em; but I'gad, I won't.
Johns.Could go on with 'em Mr. Bayes! there's no Body doubts that ”

“ Aim'd at her destin'd Head, which made her fly,Pag. 2.
Tho' She was doom'd to Death, and fated not to dye.
Smith.How came She that fear'd no Danger in the Line before, to be scar'd in this, Mr. Bayes?
Bayes.Why then you may have it chas'd if you will; for I hope a Man may run away without being afraid, mayn't he?
Johns.But pray give me leave; how was She doom'd to Death, if She was fated not to die; are not Doom and Fate, much the same thing? ”

“ Pag. 29.
One Evening, when she went away from Court,
Levee's and Couchee's past without resort.
There's Court Language for you; nothing gives a Verse so fine a turn as an Air of good Breeding.
Smith.But methinks the Levee's and Couchee's of a Mouse are too great, especially when she is walking from Court to the cooler Shades.
Bayes.I'gad now have you forgot what I told you that she was a Princess. But pray mind; here the two Mice meet.
Pag. 16.
She met the Country Mouse, whose fearful Face
Beheld from far the common watering Place,
Nor durst approach———
Smith.Methinks, Mr. ”