Lillie

“ Lillie’s cheeks crimsoned; she stood with clasped hands and loud beating heart, surveying the fragments.
“What shall we do?” she exclaimed.
“Let us go away—she’ll find the bottle broken; we need not say anything. She will not know that you did it.”
So, conscience-smitten and miserable, the little girl followed her tempter down stairs; her first thought being an earnest desire to escape the blame. Lillie was nervous and sensitive and very timid; the idea of her teacher’s displeasure overshadowed all the sunshine of that day, and made it indeed a time of wretchedness. ”

“ Lillie laughed outright, and said, "Oh yes," with a gay little air of satire.
"But she is too young to think of me," pursued the Doctor. "She can't be more than twenty-five."
"Papa!!" protested Lillie. "She is thir—ty! Have you lost your memory?"
"Thirty! Is it possible? Really, I am growing old. I am constantly understating other people's ages. I have caught myself at it repeatedly. I don't know whether it is forgetfulness, or inability to realize the flight of time, or an instinctive effort to make myself out a modern by showing that my intimates are youthful. But I am constantly doing it. ”

“ During all these years, when the interests and pleasures have been slowly dropping, leaf by leaf, and [327] passing away like fading flowers, Lillie has learned to do much thinking. It sometimes seems to take a stab, a thrust, a wound, to open in some hearts the capacity of deep feeling and deep thought. There are things taught by suffering that can be taught in no other way. By suffering sometimes is wrought out in a person the power of loving, and of appreciating love. During the first year, Lillie had often seemed to herself in a sort of wild, chaotic state. ”

“ It is rather amusing, in any family circle, to see how some one member, by dint of persistent exactions, comes to receive always, in all the exigencies of life, an amount of attention and devotion which is never rendered back. Lillie never thought of such a thing as offering any services of any sort to Grace. Grace might have packed her trunks to go to the moon, or the Pacific Ocean, quite alone for matter of any help Lillie would ever have thought of. If Grace had headache or toothache or a bad cold, Lillie was always “so sorry;” ”

“ In fact, the clergy, when off duty, are no safer guides of attractive young women than other mortal men; and Lillie had so often seen their spiritual attentions degenerate into downright, temporal love-making, that she held them in as small reverence as the rest of their sex. Only one dreadful John the Baptist of her acquaintance, one of the camel’s-hair-girdle and locust-and-wild-honey species, once encountering Lillie at Saratoga, and observing the ways and manners of the court which she kept there, took it upon him to give her a spiritual admonition. ”

“ Lillie's letter has really done me good; her regal serenity makes itself apparent beneath all she undertakes. It is wonderful that she does not preach at me like the others. "You must know what is right for yourself better than anybody else," she says. ”

“ I have fitted her work, when ’tis done,” said mamma,
“And the lesson is learned, she may go.”
“I can work after dinner,” said Lillie, “do please
Just for once to grant Eddie’s request.”
“My dear,” said her mother, “’tis no use to teaze,
After work, not before, you may rest.”
Lillie took up her book, with a tear in her eye,
She could scarce see a word that was in it;
But Eddie declared ’twas of no use to cry,
And she thought so herself in a minute.
Resolving to try, and do all in her power,
To make of each duty a pleasure,
She conquered ”

“ A whole life spent in self-seeking and self-pleasing is no preparation for the most august and austere of woman’s sufferings and duties; and it is not to be wondered at if the untrained, untaught, and self-indulgent shrink from this ordeal, as Lillie did.
The next spring, while the gables of the new cottage on Elm Street were looking picturesquely through the blossoming cherry-trees, and the smoke was curling up from the chimneys where Grace and her husband were cosily settled down together, there came to John’s house another little Lillie. ”

“ Lillie, as far as I can recollect, is a year older than I am. Could you not—woman's specialist as you are—have found some explanation in this fact? Had Lillie been fifty-five or thirty-five, all this would never have happened. I do not care for strangers to look into my personal affairs, and although you are my cousin's husband you are practically a stranger to me. Nevertheless I may remind you that women at our time of life pass through critical moments, as I know by my daily experiences. ”

“ Lillie, after all, estimated his devotion at just about what it was worth. It amused her to see him make a fool of himself.
Of course, the next thing was—to be married; and Lillie’s life now became a round of dressing, dancing, going to watering-places, travelling, and in other ways seeking the fulfilment of her destiny.
She had precisely the accessible, easy softness of manner that leads every man to believe that he may prove a favorite, and her run of offers became quite a source of amusement. Her arrival at watering-places was noted in initials in the papers ”

“ Everybody drank the beer, and Lillie began to hum a little song. In about a minute Violet reeled around in her chair and tumbled off on the floor in a confused heap of white muslin, blondined hair and black stockings.
Captain Clancy seemed much vexed. He shot a steel blue flash from his eyes at Lillie and said something very much like “d——n it” to himself.
“Great heavens!” cried Mr. Simmons, “this lady has fainted. Call a doctor, or get some water or somethin’ quick.”
“Say,” said Lillie, lighting a cigarette, “don’t get woozy. She’ll sleep it off. You gents get out for a while. ”

“ Lillie was very fond of singing. She could sing most delightfully, "Old Dog Tray," "I want to be an Angel," "Pop goes the Weasel," and many other beautiful airs. She had taught Willie to sing "Pop—go—a—dee—sell," as he called it, and was unwearied in her efforts to amuse him, for he was a delicate little fellow, and had been sick a great deal. In this, Lillie was imitating her sister [Pg 68] Annie, (do you see the importance of a good example?) ”

“ Lillie was a selfish, exacting mother; and such women often succeed in teaching to their children patience and self-denial. As soon as the little creature could walk, she was her father’s constant play-fellow and companion. ”

“ Lillie was a born heroine, being young and beautiful from her birth. In her fourth year she conceived a Platonic affection for the boy who brought the telegrams. His manners had such repose. This was followed by a hopeless passion for a French cavalry officer with spurs. Every one feared she would grow up to be a suicide or a poetess ”

“ Lillie, who, it must be understood, was secretly somewhat sceptical about the power of her friend’s charms, and looked on this little French romance with the eye of an outsider: “never you believe that, dearest. These men make dreadful tearings, and shocking eyes and mouths; but they take pretty good care to keep in the world, after all. You see, if a man’s dead, there’s an end of all things; and I fancy they think of that before they quite come to any thing decisive.”
“Chère étourdie,” said Mrs. Follingsbee, regarding Lillie with a pensive smile: “you are just your old self, I see ”

“ I’m sure you have done all that could be asked.”
“Well, I’m sure I hope those folks of yours were pleased,” quoth Lillie, as she lay looking like a martyr, with a cloth wet in ice-water bound round her head. “They ought to be; they have left grease-spots all over the sofa in my boudoir, from one end to the other; and cake and raisins have been trodden into the carpets; and the turf around the oval is all cut up ”

“ Lilly struggled against sleep.
She saw as through a veil the thin blond hair waving over her mother's forehead in the morning breeze, saw the pointed nose, red with weeping, turn now to the right, now to the left, according to the direction from which a sound came; saw the nightgown fluttering like a white flag, and the lean legs incessantly rubbing against each other in nervous agitation. ”

“ When, bearing blessings, they descend to earth."
Shall we describe the angel-child Lilly, whose symmetrical features and quiet ways were the exact counterpart of her father's, or shall we leave her to the creation of the fancy, after giving the brief outlines? Fair as a lily her straight soft brown hair was of the richest hue in which nature asserted her independence, as that of both her parents curled. ”

“ In mortal fright Lilly ran to the mother and threatened to leave that instant unless she was allowed to control affairs as before.
Mrs. Asmussen, who knew her scapegrace offspring through and through, took sides with Lilly, and the storm seemed to have blown over.
The girls took to entreaty and in reawakened intimacy gave Lilly new and comprehensive views into the depths of their soul life.
Did she think they cared a row of pins for the miserable little meringues they ate at Frangipani's? Not a bit of it. They were clever enough to know how to provide for the future. ”

“ Lilly felt a dull terror arise within her of that old lady who sat commandingly in her arm-chair behind those respectable porcelain flower pots, and directed the conduct of so powerful a man as Lilly's benefactor. ”

“ Lilly exclaimed, eager to cast a ray of her own confidence into his heart. "When somebody is like you, with the mark of greatness on his face, then the world lies at his feet."
She described a semicircle with her right hand, taking in the entire plain, its green bushes and silvery streams and the city with its wreath of swelling gardens lying embedded in the fields like a lark's nest in a meadow. Lilly felt as if she were showing him a small copy of his future realm.
He nodded several times in the dejected consciousness of knowing better than she what the world is like. ”

“ Life can be hard, Lilly. And now—war. Make it easier for yourself. Don't let him out there—go over there—anywhere—reproaching. Your parents—your child—it's his as much as yours, Lilly. If I had gone first, my boy would have reproached. There is nothing so terrible, Lilly—as eyes that reproach—eyes—Lilly—don't. ”

“ Endure the homage of the world for a few days longer—only for a few days, petite, and then it will be over. Paris will be empty, and we ourselves will be inhaling the mountain air of Switzerland,” laughed the lady.
And Lilith, having no alternative, endured the tortures of her false position until the fashionable world had fled from town.
The baroness and her companion lingered a little behind the others, in order that Madame Von Bruyin might show Lilith all those places of interest which a new-comer must see, but which had hitherto been neglected for other and more social pastimes. ”

“ Lilly saw as little of the riot of blossom out of doors, the white foam of the cherry-trees, the red glory of the hawthorn, as she had done when she swept the golden dust that sprang from Frau Asmussen's bookcases. Frau Laue did not care to take walks and expose herself to temptation. For to see a park and not collect plants, a garden gate, and not thrust your hand through it to pick flowers, was to her an altogether inconceivable act of self-restraint. Lilly would not go out without her, for she dreaded being alone in a crowd. ”

“ Often after supper she drew Lilly into the room on the ground floor, where she dwelt amid her account books. A genuine old maid's home, with canary birds, flower pots, faded family photographs, and all sorts of gilt and china knick-knacks, remnants of past glory such as are handed down from generation to generation in families of decayed gentlefolk.
At other times she came gliding into Lilly's bedroom at an incredibly late hour, seated herself on the edge of the bed, and did not stir until she heard the sound of the colonel's carriage coming from the station. ”

“ That evening, after Monsieur Le Grange had bidden them good-night, Madame Von Bruyin and Lilith had a final talk on the question of her—Lilith—returning to New York or traveling over Europe with the baroness.
The prospect of varied travel in company with her charming friend had great attractions for Lilith, certainly, so that when the baroness put it to her heart and conscience not to break the compact she had made with so fond a friend, Lilith not only yielded the point and consented to remain with the baroness, but she did so with evident pleasure. ”

“ The rose looked at her when the sun came upon them that morning, but the lily did not raise her head; she was too full of sorrow to lift her face to the sun, and by and by the rose saw that she was drooping lower and lower, so she spoke to her.
"Lily," she said, leaning closer to her, "raise your head and let the sun cheer you. You will die if you do not open your petals and get the light and air."
But the poor lily was past caring for sun or air; her petals were limp and her stalk withered. ”

“ But what is that for a life?” cried the Marchese, with a hollow mockery.
“What do YOU care for?” asked Lilly.
“Me? I care for several things. I care for my wife. I care for love. And I care to be loved. And I care for some pleasures. And I care for music. And I care for Italy.”
“You are well off for cares,” said Lilly.
“And you seem to me so very poor,” said Del Torre.
“I should say so—if he cares for nothing,” interjaculated Argyle. Then he clapped Lilly on the shoulder with a laugh. “Ha! Ha! Ha!—But he only says it to tease us,” he cried, shaking Lilly's shoulder. ”