Thubway Tham

“ Then Thubway Tham began to dream, much as countless thousands have dreamed before they purchased cars. He saw himself behind the wheel, leaning back easily against the cushions, shifting gears and touching the accelerator like a man born to motoring. He saw himself stopping at corners, darting forward at the beckoning of the traffic cop's hand, swinging close to the curb and frightening men, women and children. He saw himself speeding, yet with eyes half closed and hands touching the wheel lightly, as if speed were a matter of everyday life to him. ”

“ Rage surging within him, Thubway Tham decided to be avenged to the full extent. He pushed farther into the crowd. His trained hands set to work. He brushed against a pompous individual and obtained a wallet, and slipped away from the curious sightseers.
He turned west on Fortieth Street, emptied the wallet and tossed the leather to one side, and returned to the crowd. The men from the garage had not yet arrived.
Tham forced his way to the car and stood beside it in an attitude of protection. A man who radiated prosperity stepped up beside him. ”

“ Tham followed across the lot to a stage in a corner, where Merrington had gathered half a dozen actors and actresses together.
“Here he is!” the director cried. “We're going to have this scene right, believe me! Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Thubway Tham, the foremost pickpocket of the city. He fools the police. What he doesn't know about lifting a leather isn't known by mortal man. Tham, this is Miss Silvia Blosser.”
Thubway Tham turned to face a smiling divinity. Silvia Blosser was a true beauty off the stage as well as on, and little make-up was necessary. She had youth, grace, vivacity. ”

“ Now Tham had his mind fixed firmly upon the wallet. If he did not get it he was disgraced, he told himself. Should any man give him such a clever tongue lashing as Joshua Simlon had given him and escape unpunished? No!
Tham watched for chances on the train, but could get none. All the way to New York, Thubway Tham, throwing the idea of sleep aside, tried to think of some scheme whereby he could get near Simlon while that man did not know it. Tham began to grow desperate. That wallet would give him revenge and a profit, and Tham wanted both. ”

“ Thubway Tham told himself, and, having decided the question, he crossed his legs, lighted a cigarette, and puffed slowly.
Tham did not feel like descending into the subway and indulging in the act known to the underworld and the police department as “lifting a leather.” Being a successful professional pickpocket, Tham knew that he should not go about his work half asleep unless he courted incarceration, trial, and conviction. ”

“ Since the day when it had been thrown open for the use of the public, Thubway Tham had worshiped the big line. Life away from the subway was something too awful for Tham to contemplate.
He wished Craddock would leave him. It was almost one o’clock, and Tham knew that the newsboys were gathering for the feast he had promised them. ”

“ Craddock informed him. “Your ear is not attuned to the music of the reel. You have never felt the tug that means a two-pounder has taken your dare. To see the flash of silvery scales in the sun——”
“My goodneth!” Tham exclaimed.
“Ah, boy, that's the life!”
Craddock sighed. Thubway Tham lighted a fresh cigarette and puffed for a moment in silence,
“Well I must be going down the street,” Craddock said, getting up from the bench. “I'll see you again, Tham, and tell you about some of the big ones I caught.” ”

“ Had the visitor to the city played him for an easy mark, got him to pass the money so that, if an arrest came, Tham would be the one arrested?
And Thubway Tham was known well in all the places where he had changed bills. The proprietors would be quick to complain about it. Crooks themselves, for the most part, they would not have another crook play them.
With a heavy heart Thubway Tham began making the rounds. It was as he had expected— several men called him to account. Thubway Tham gave good bills and collected the bad ones, and explained how he had been worked. ”

“ They went slowly to the hotel with their morning catches, and just then Joshua Simlon came in with twice as many fish as any other man had and began boasting. The other fishermen glared at him and turned away, and then looked furtively at one another like a crowd of conspirators.
Thubway Tham sat alone at a table in a corner of the dining room at luncheon. He was looked over carefully by half a dozen men who fondly believed that they could read men aright. ”

“ Thubway Tham was behind the counter, waiting on trade.
Detective Craddock waited until there came a time when no customers were in the little shop, and then entered and stepped up to the counter. He grinned at Thubway Tham, but Tham’s face expressed only the fact that he was a business man.
“What’s the big idea?” Craddock wanted to know.
“I fail to grathp you,” Thubway Tham told him.
“You do, eh? Try again. You grasp me, all right. What’s the big idea of masquerading as an honest working man?” ”

“ And now Thubway Tham waited for an opportune moment. It came when the express made the next stop. There was a wild surging toward the door. Men and women struggled to get out, and others struggled to get in.
Tham's hand darted downward and did its work, The wallet was obtained without difficulty and slipped into the side pocket of Tham's coat. ”

“ Tham felt sure the elderly gentleman could afford to lose a few dollars, and that perhaps he was the sort of man who would have fed a group of newsboys himself, had he happened to think of it.
The train stopped, and the crowd surged from the cars. Thubway Tham brushed against the elderly gentleman for a moment, and an instant later he had a fat wallet in his own pocket. ”

“ Tham said.
“As if that should bother you,” said the salesman. “For five dollars, one of our experts will teach you all about it in one lesson; spend half a day, a day, if necessary, with you. It's nothing to drive a car. Look at the thousands who do it, thousands who haven't the common sense, intelligence and adaptability you possess.”
Thubway Tham had not known that he possessed those things, but he felt that the words of the salesman were true. Almost before he knew it, he had purchased the car and paid over five hundred dollars. ”

“ Craddock had told him more than a year and a half before that his presence in that section of the city would mean instant arrest on a vagrancy charge. Men of Thubway Tham’s ilk knew better than to invade certain parts of the metropolis. ”

“ Thubway Tham had decided that his first duty was to lose Detective Craddock. He disliked Elmer, but wished to show him that he, Thubway Tham, was as far above the elevated dip as the stars above the earth, when it came to being a professional pickpocket.
Tham hurried up Sixth Avenue through the crowds, now and then flinching a bit when an elevated train roared by overhead. Every train that passed made more firm his determination to win over Elmer. The fame of his beloved subway was at stake in a way, he had decided. He’d show Elmer! ”

“ So they drifted about the city for two hours, and finally Thubway Tham began to have hopes.
The countryman began exhibiting the first signs of intoxication. Tham decided that he’d make the attempt soon now. And then the visitor to the city took the wind out of his sails.
“You look like an honest young feller,” he said. “And you know all about this town. I can’t enjoy myself while I’m worryin’ about my money. ”

“ The team gathered speed, and the old vehicle rounded a curve in the woods and emerged upon a better road. In the distance was the lake with a couple of streams flowing into it, and the hotel.
Tham descended from the bus like a metropolitan, paid the driver, let a man have his grip, and entered the hostelry. As a hotel, it was not much for looks, Thubway Tham decided. But he was fair—he did not expect to find here in the woods the ornate splendor of a metropolitan hostelry. Moreover, he had come to fish. All he asked of the hotel was food and a place to sleep. ”

“ Suddenly Thubway Tham darted up the stairs.
For the second time that day he bought a ticket for the elevated. He rushed to the platform just in time to spring aboard a train, and he turned and grinned at Craddock, who was just too late to get aboard. Well, he had escaped for the time being. Then horror came to him!
Craddock and the police knew that there was a clever pickpocket working on the elevated. And he, like a fool, had taken the elevated before Craddock’s eyes, when all the underworld knew that he hated the structure above the ground. ”

“ I had the scenario writers think of every type in America and make a list, and now I am getting a person to fit every type, and I'll put some sort of plot around the whole thing. The type's the thing.”
“My goodneth!” gasped Thubway Tham.
“I have a leading man who is a pickpocket——”
“I've heard a lot of them are,” said Tham.
“Only in the play, fellow!” Merrington roared. “In real life he wouldn't have nerve enough. I've got a leading man—confidentially—who is as handsome as the marble statue of a Greek god, and who has about as much brains. ”

“ The train roared into the station and stopped.
The doors flew open. The crowd surged forward.
Thubway Tham jammed himself close against Elmer as the surge began. His experienced hand darted down—and up. His heart exulted.
When Elmer made for the stairs, Thubway Tham was just behind him. They reached the street, and Elmer started walking down it. Thubway Tham kept his hand in his pocket, opened the wallet under cover, felt bills, and took them out. Then he drew a notebook and a piece of pencil from his pocket and wrote as he walked along. ”

“ With all the subway trains, and with all the persons riding on them, was it at all necessary for this interloper to pick the man that Tham himself had decided to rob?
“Maketh me thick!” Tham growled low down in his throat.
He decided to allow the tall man to work his will. Something like a hunch had come to Thubway Tham. He had a feeling of uneasiness. There seemed to be disaster in the air. He made his way toward the other end of the car, but got into a position from which he could watch the other.
The train was approaching a station. ”

“ On the following day, Tham went forth as usual, alert for officers of the law, ready to dodge any old friend he might see, eager to make a last haul before announcing his presence in the city.
He boarded a train at Union Square and started uptown. At the next station, he saw his rival get aboard.
Thubway Tham had noticed a prosperouslooking gentleman standing near one end of the car, and had speculated on removing valuables from the gentleman’s pocket. But now he watched his rival.
The tall man glanced at the others in the car, and he, too, saw the prosperous-looking individual. ”

“ There are some persons born to find peace and contentment only by traveling a beaten track and following a deadly routine. Thubway Tham was like that, in a way. Once he had attempted to reform and had met with disaster. Once he had tried to get away from New York and had met with nothing but bad luck and homesickness. Once he had decided that he would stop working in the subway and try some other game, and had barely escaped capture, incarceration and physical and mental anguish. ”

“ Tham advised him. “I can borrow, and I can collect what thome men owe me. And I can get me a job thome plathe when all other hope ith gone.”
Thubway Tham turned away—and Detective Craddock turned after him. Tham was near to tears. Why, he’d not dare look a newsie in the face after this, he told himself. They’d hate the sight of him. And he didn’t have the nerve to go across to the restaurant and tell them the truth; he knew what sort of a reception that would earn for him.
He passed the subway entrance, where there was quite a throng now, and Craddock moved closer. ”

“ Noel replied with some indignation. “I have been on my annual fishing trip.”
“My goodneth! Annual fithin' trip!” Thubway Tham exclaimed. “You go on one regular?”
“Certainly,” said Nifty Noel. “I take a fishing trip every year. Tham, my boy, it is a great thing. You get out into the sun and the fresh air, and it's great sport. Oh, I'd not think of missing my regular fishing trip.”
“No?” Tham asked.
“No,” repeated Nifty Noel. “It braces a man up, sweeps the cobwebs out of his brain, and he comes back to his—er—work with a new snap. It's worth many times the price expended.” ”

“ A local, Tham felt, could not travel with sufficient speed to suit him at present. He stood back from the track, his bag between his feet, watching the crowd. He had no intention of “working”; he wanted to get home to his room. To-morrow he would go forth and seek victims.
But a job was thrust upon him. A fresh crowd surged forward, and Thubway Tham looked it over. And he saw the porter of the car in which he had ridden from Chicago to New York. Moreover, it appeared that the porter was intending to ride downtown. ”

“ He had learned years before that the subway was lucky for him, and that other places were inclined to harbor disaster.
Tham journeyed the length of the train to the diner, after a time, and enjoyed an excellent meal. And then he went back to his compartment. The porter had been busy removing invisible specks of dust. He sprang forward and opened the door when Tham appeared.
“If you would like your suit sponged and pressed, sir, just put it outside on the railing,” the porter said.
Thubway Tham scratched at his head again. Class! After all, when a man got a compartment, he got something. ”