George Gissing

“ I 'm a man talking about his wife—that 's to say, I see facts as facts, and not through a mist of sentiment. You still think of women as angels, do you? It 's an amiable weakness; I never was given to it myself. I 've played the fool about women, especially about Jenny; but something in my character has always pulled me up before I went plunging down a steep place, like—you know.
Come now; in the old days, when we wasted so much time over at Norwood, did you really think Jenny the kind of girl that a sensible fellow with a small income would wish to marry? ”

“ I 'm not the kind of fellow that 's always thinking about his comfort. Certainly I object to the waste of good food—potatoes like soap and meat like leather; but it 's what every man who can't afford a cook has to be content with. I kept Jenny supplied with books from Mudie's, and I took care she should have decent things to go out in. She hadn't much of my society; that couldn't be helped. A woman must find resources in herself.
One evening when I came home to dinner—or tea, rather, for I pretended to have midday dinner in town—Jenny was prostrate. ”

“ Jenny ought to have had time to recover herself and look round. And I didn't forget this afterwards, I assure you I didn't. It made me a deuced sight more patient than most men would have been. For all that, a girl of three-and-twenty isn't a child, and a married woman has no more claim to indulgence if she behaves with idiotic selfishness than a married man. That 's one of my points. There 's a common idea that the wives of poor men are long-suffering angels, while their husbands have a comparatively easy time of it. Damned nonsense! As a rule, it 's the other way about. ”

“ I saw my way, and meant to pursue it. Before long I believe other men will go and do likewise. It needs pluck, but the end is worth a struggle. I have recovered self-respect, and I am master in my own house. It may take years of steady ruling before Jenny gives up all hope of a return to the fashionable life. At present she is trying sentimental hypocrisy; but it's no use.
Her rights as an individual? Humbug! She is not an individual; it 's the rarest thing to meet a women who is.
If the life becomes intolerable to her? The door is always open, and an allowance at her disposal. ”

“ The honest truth is that to me she seemed about the last girl to make a good wife; but I, too, was in love with her—devilish hard hit, as I think you know. Just when I ought to have been tagging at my profession, I wallowed in idleness—all on account of Jenny. We see the result now: I 'm one of the slow-coaches; I can't make a large income, and perhaps I never shall. No: I don't blame her for that. Wait a bit, and watch the course of things.
I wonder a steady-going fellow like you could stand her ways. ”

“ I don't insure my life, though it's my duty to do so, because the premium goes in keeping up appearances. I never buy a book. I never take a journey to please myself. I never subscribe to a charity I never lend or give to anyone. ”

“ I was determined not to get into debt for furniture. We bought just the bare necessaries, at a trifling cost. Of course, Jenny had the choosing, and she managed sensibly enough—in fact, I had to insist on a few comforts she wished to dispense with.
I 'm glad to see you smile. Just as well to keep that side in view. There 's more comedy than tragedy in the whole affair, if only you see the truth of it. ”