Voltaire

“ Whoever sets up for a Commentator of smart Sayings and Repartees, is himself a Blockhead. This is the Reason why the Works of the ingenious Dean Swift, who has been call'd the English Rabelais, will never be well understood in France. This Gentleman has the Honour (in common with Rabelais) of being a Priest, and like him laughs at every Thing. But in my humble Opinion, the Title of the English Rabelais which is given the Dean, is highly derogatory to his Genius. ”

“ THE Philosophers of the last Age found out a new Universe; and a Circumstance which made its Discovery more difficult, was, that no one had so much as suspected its Existence. The most Sage and Judicious were of Opinion, that 'twas a frantic Rashness to dare so much as to imagine that it was possible to guess the Laws by which the celestial Bodies move, and the manner how Light acts. Galileo by his astronomical Discoveries, Kepler by his Calculation, Des Cartes (at least in his Dioptricks) and Sir Isaac Newton in all his Works, severally saw the Mechanism of the Springs of the World. ”

“ No, no, friend, replies the Quaker, to our great happiness. Then opening one of the friend's books, as he call'd it, he read the following words in an emphatic tone: God forbid we should presume to ordain any one to receive the holy spirit on the Lord's day, to the prejudice of the rest of the brethren. Thanks to the almighty, we are the only people upon earth that have no priests. Wouldest thou deprive us of so happy a distinction? Why shou'd we abandon our babe to mercenary nurses, when we our selves have milk enough for it? ”

“ THE Members of the English Parliament are fond of comparing themselves to the old Romans.
Not long since, Mr. Shippen open'd a speech in the house of Commons with these words, The Majesty of the People of England would be wounded. The singularity of the expression occasion'd a loud laugh; but this Gentleman, so far from being disconcerted, repeated the same words with a resolute tone of voice, and the laugh ceas'd. In my opinion, the Majesty of the people of England has nothing in common with that of the people of Rome, much less is there any affinity between their governments. ”

“ Go into Westminster-Abbey, and you'll find that what raises the Admiration of the Spectator is not the Mausoleums of the English Kings, but the Monuments which the Gratitude of the Nation has erected, to perpetuate the Memory of those illustrious Men who contributed to its Glory. ”

“ I must confess that one of the Things I very much wonder at, is, that as the Parliament of Great-Britain have promis'd a Reward of twenty thousand Pounds Sterling to any Person who may discover the Longitude, they should never have once thought to imitate Lewis the Fourteenth in his Munificence with regard to the Arts and Sciences.
Merit indeed meets in England with Rewards of another kind, which redound more to the Honour of the Nation. The English have so great a Veneration for exalted Talents, that a Man of Merit in their Country is always sure of making his Fortune. ”

“ And when, after a victory is gain'd, the whole city of London is illuminated; when the sky is in a blaze with fireworks, and a noise is heard in the air of thanksgivings, of bells, of organs, and of the cannon, we groan in silence, and are deeply affected with sadness of spirit and brokenness of heart, for the sad havock which is the occasion of those public rejoycings. ”

“ The most astonishing, the most useful Inventions, are not those which reflect the greatest Honour on the human Mind. 'Tis to a mechanical Instinct, which is found in many Men, and not to true Philosophy, that most Arts owe their Origin.
The Discovery of Fire, the Art of making Bread, of melting and preparing Metals, of building Houses, and the Invention of the Shuttle are infinitely more beneficial to Mankind than Printing or the Sea-Compass: And yet these Arts were invented by uncultivated, savage Men. ”

“ Congreve's Comedies are the most witty and regular, those of Sir John Vanbrugh most gay and humourous, and those of Mr. Wycherley have the greatest Force and Spirit. It may be proper to observe, that these fine Genius's never spoke disadvantageously of Moliere; and that none but the contemptible Writers among the English have endeavour'd to lessen the Character of that great comic Poet. Such Italian Musicians as despise Lully are themselves Persons of no Character or Ability; but a Buononcini esteems that great Artist, and does Justice to his Merit. ”

“ However, I need not say which is most useful to a Nation; a Lord, powder'd in the tip of the Mode, who knows exactly at what a Clock the King rises and goes to bed; and who gives himself Airs of Grandeur and State, at the same Time that he is acting the Slave in the Anti-chamber of a prime Minister; or a Merchant, who enriches his Country, dispatches Orders from his Compting-House to Surat and Grand Cairo, and contributes to the Felicity of the World. ”

“ I never was, replied the Quaker, nor any of my brethren. Zouns, says I to him, you are not Christians then. Friend, replies the old man in a soft tone of voice, swear not; we are Christians, and endeavour to be good Christians, but we are not of opinion, that the sprinkling water on a child's head makes him a Christian. Heavens! says I, shock'd at his impiety, you have then forgot that Christ was baptiz'd by St. John. Friend, replies the mild Quaker once again, swear not. Christ indeed was baptiz'd by John, but he himself never baptiz'd any one. We are the disciples of Christ, not of John. ”

“ The Academy of Sciences, in such of their Researches as are of a more difficult kind and a more sensible Use, embrace the Knowledge of Nature and the Improvements of the Arts. We may presume that such profound, such uninterrupted Pursuits as these, such exact Calculations, such refin'd Discoveries, such extensive and exalted Views, will, at last, produce something that may prove of Advantage to the Universe. ”

“ Here all the School Philosophers interrupt me with their Arguments, and declare that there is only Extension and Solidity in Bodies, and that there they can have nothing but Motion and Figure. Now Motion, Figure, Extension and Solidity cannot form a Thought, and consequently the Soul cannot be Matter. ”

“ When the Lord Townshend was Minister of State, a Brother of his was content to be a City Merchant; and at the Time that the Earl of Oxford govern'd Great-Britain, his younger Brother was no more than a Factor in Aleppo, where he chose to live, and where he died. This Custom, which begins however to be laid asfide, appears monstruous to Germans, vainly puff'd up with their Extraction. These think it morally impossible that the Son of an English Peer should be no more than a rich and powerful Citizens, for all are Princes in Germany. ”

“ Happily in the violent shocks which the divisions between Kings and the Nobles gave to empires, the chains of Nations were more or less heavy. Liberty, in England, sprung from the quarrels of Tyrants. The Barons forc'd King John and King Henry the third, to grant the famous Magna Charta, the chief design of which was indeed to make Kings dependant on the Lords, but then the rest of the nation were a little favour'd in it, in order that they might join, on proper occasions, with their pretended Masters. ”

“ Sir Isaac Newton is allow'd every Advantage, whilst Des Cartes is not indulg'd a single one. According to some, 'tis to the former that we owe the Discovery of a Vacuum, that the Air is a heavy Body, and the Invention of Telescopes. In a Word, Sir Isaac Newton is here as the Hercules of fabulous Story, to whom the Ignorant ascrib'd all the Feats of ancient Heroes. ”

“ Nevertheless he at last abandon'd this Guide, and gave entirely into the Humour of forming Hypotheses; and then Philosophy was no more than an ingenious Romance, fit only to amuse the Ignorant. He was mistaken in the Nature of the Soul, in the Proofs of the Existence of a God, in Matter, in the Laws of Motion, and in the Nature of Light. He admitted innate Ideas, he invented new Elements, he created a World; he made Man according to his own Fancy; and 'tis justly said, that the Man of Des Cartes is in Fact that of Des Cartes only, very different from the real one. ”

“ That which rises to a Revolution in England is no more than a Sedition in other countries. A city in Spain, in Barbary, or in Turkey, takes up arms in defence of its Privileges, when immediately 'tis storm'd by mercenary Troops, 'tis punish'd by Executioners, and the rest of the Nation kiss the chains they are loaded with. ”

“ The English have doubtless purchas'd their Liberties at a very high price, and waded thro' seas of blood to drown the Idol of arbitrary Power. Other nations have been involv'd in as great calamities, and have shed as much blood ”

“ Perhaps these Gentlemen would think it too great a Condescension, to allow one and the same Man the Glory of having improv'd natoral Philosophy, Geometry and History. This would be a kind of universal Monarchy, which the Principle of Self-Love that is in Man, will scarce suffer him to indulge his Fellow-Creature; and, indeed, at the same Time that some very great Philosophers attack'd Sir Isaac Newton's attractive Principle, others fell upon his chronological System. Time that shou'd discover to which of these the Victory is due, may perhaps only leave the Dispute still more undetermin'd. ”

“ No person can possess an employment either in England or Ireland, unless he be rank'd among the faithful, that is, professes himself a member of the Church of England. This reason (which carries mathematical evidence with it) has converted such numbers of dissenters of all persuasions, that not a twentieth part of the nation is out of the pale of the establish'd church. The English clergy have retain'd a great number of the Romish ceremonies, and especially that of receiving, with a most scrupulous attention, their tithes. They also have the pious ambition to aim at superiority. ”

“ Locke, I would say, that Men have long disputed on the Nature and the Immortality of the Soul. With regard to its Immortality, 'tis impossible to give a Demonstration of it, since its Nature is still the Subject of Controversy; which however must be thoroughly understood, before a Person can he able to determine whether it be immortal or not. Human Reason is so little able, merely by its own Strength, to demonstrate the Immortality of the soul, that 'twas absolutely necessary Religion should reveal it to us. ”

“ Congreve rais'd the Glory of Comedy to a greater Height than any English Writer before or since his Time. He wrote only a few Plays, but they are all excellent in their kind. The Laws of the Drama are strictly observ'd in them; they abound with Characters all which are shadow'd with the utmost Delicacy, and we don't meet with so much as one low, or coarse Jest. The Language is every where that of Men of Honour, but their Actions are those of Knaves; a Proof that he was perfectly well acquainted with human Nature, and frequented what we call polite Company. ”

“ If one religion only were allowed in England, the government would very possibly become arbitrary; if there were but two, the people wou'd cut one another's throats; but as there are such a multitude, they all live happy and in peace. ”

“ How great wou'd have been his Astonishment, had he been told, that Light does not reflect directly by impinging against the solid Parts of Bodies; that Bodies are not transparent when they have large Pores; and that a Man should arise, who would demonstrate all these Paradoxes, and anatomize a single Ray of Light with more Dexterity than the ablest Artist dissects a human Body. This Man is come. Sir Isaac Newton has demonstrated to the Eye, by the bare Assistance of the Prism, that Light is a Composition of colour'd Rays, which, being united, form white Colour. ”

“ I have taught you, may Sir Isaac rejoin, that all Bodies gravitate towards one another in proportion to their Quantity of Matter; that these central Forces alone, keep the Planets and Comets in their Orbits, and cause them to move in the Proportion before set down. I demonstrate to you, that 'tis impossible there should be any other Cause which keeps the Planets in their Orbits, than that general Phenomenon of Gravity, or heavy Bodies fall on the Earth according to the Proportion demonstrated of central Forces ”

“ When the Bill has pass'd the Lords and is sign'd by the King, then the whole Nation pays, every Man in proportion to his Revenue or Estate, not according to his Title, which would be absurd. There is no such thing as an arbitrary Subsidy or Poll-Tax, but a real Tax on the Lands, of all which an Estimate was made in the Reign of the famous King William the Third. ”

“ We never swear, not even in a court of justice, being of opinion that the most holy name of God ought not to be prostituted in the miserable contests betwixt man and man. When we are oblig'd to appear before a magistrate upon other people's account, (for law-suits are unknown among the friends) we give evidence to the truth by sealing it with our yea or nay; and the judges believe us on our bare affirmation, whilst so many other Christians forswear themselves on the holy Gospels. ”

“ The natives of the country instead of flying into the woods, cultivated by insensible degrees a friendship with the peaceable Quakers. They lov'd these foreigners as much as they detested the other Christians who had conquer'd and laid waste America. In a little time, a great number of these savages (falsely so call'd) charm'd with the mild and gentle disposition of their neighbours, came in crowds to William Pen, and besought him to admit them into the number of his vassals. ”

“ Whilst that the Barons, the Bishops, and the Popes, all laid waste England, where all were for ruling; the most numerous, the most useful, even the most virtuous, and consequently the most venerable part of mankind, consisting of those who study the laws and the sciences; of traders, of artificers, in a word, of all who were not tyrants; that is, those who are call'd the people ”