Various

“ April 1.—I go walking near barracks; see man looking quietly at building. Suddenly fires the sentry with his long distance rifle, so that the straight onward through the harmless onlooker's heart and through my never sufficiently to be regretted right arm passing bullet in the remote distance a child kills. ”

“ June 1.—At last am I from arm-amputation recovered and walk again out. The sentry was for his on the first April quite courageous act to be Sergeant promoted. Here comes a Sergeant! He is it! Look curiously at him whereupon he me in the leg shoots. Long live our Emperor! Again carried home.
Sept. 1.—Again out, in invalid chair, meet same man, now Lieutenant. I murmur sadly, "Ah, my friend, I gave you a leg-up indeed!" Then he, saying that I him insulted have, my remaining arm with his sword off cuts. I respect our Emperor, but I love not his soldiers now. Must hire an amanuensis. ”

“ TREE's Hamlet attracts the young Court Jester's attention to his forthcoming novelty. Now this time, as the repartee is about as rude a thing as any vulgar cad of an 'ARRY might have uttered, the professional Jester, who evidently does not owe his appointment to the Lord Chamberlain's favour, and is exempt from his jurisdiction, grins all over his countenance, and hops away to explain the jest to some of the courtiers, while Hamlet himself, to judge by his smiling countenance, is clearly very much pleased with his own performance in showing a Jester how the fool should be played. ”

“ Then again, in the Churchyard, after the scandalous brawling (brought about by the stupid ignorance of a dunderheaded ecclesiastic, to whose Bishop Laertes ought to have immediately reported him) , Hamlet returns to weep and throw flowers into the grave. Now excellent "returns" are dear to the managerial heart, and consoling to his pocket, when they attest the overflowing attendance of "friends in front;" but when "returns" are on the stage, their excellence may be questioned on the score of monotony. ”

“ Should the proposal be adopted, no doubt some such paper as the following will be set to those desirous of obtaining the right of adding "M.I.J." to their names.
1. Would you as a Reporter venture to use such expressions as "devouring element" or "destructive fluid" in sending in "flimsy" to a London Daily Paper? State when you would consider yourself entitled to describe yourself "a Special."
2. What are the rights of a Journalist at a free luncheon? If an Editor finds himself present, should he return thanks for the Press himself, or leave that duty in the hands of a bumptious Reporter. ”

“ But when application was made to these institutions, their secretaries professed a complete and chilling ignorance of GORTON, and the deputation from Ballywhacket, which had gone to London in search of gold, had to return empty-handed to their native place, after wasting a varied stock of full-flavoured Irish denunciation on the London pavements. But GORTON was undaunted. He actually published an address in which he lashed the hateful ingratitude of men who betrayed their friends with golden words, and abandoned them shamefully in the hour of defeat. ”

“ So he became temporarily insane, to avoid defeat and maintain his reputation for scholarship. He left Oxford without taking a degree, and owing money right and left—to tradesmen, to his friends, to his tutor. Then he disappeared for some years.
Next he suddenly cropped up again in Ireland. A small borough constituency had been suddenly declared vacant. GORTON happened to be staying in the hotel. He promptly offered himself as a candidate, and plunged with extraordinary vigour into the contest. The way that man fooled a simple-hearted Irish electorate was marvellous. ”

“ TREE's impersonation of Hamlet most London playgoers are by this time acquainted, though not yet familiar. It is a most interesting performance, especially to those who remember the inauguration of startling new departures by CHARLES FECHTER. The question for every fresh Hamlet must always be, "How can I differentiate my Hamlet from all previous Hamlets? What can I do that nobody has as yet thought of doing?" "To be or not to be" Hamlet, "that is the question" ”

“ I am now a without legs or arms Socialist. My enemy can be promoted now only by my body. He has become a General and Count— (Here the Diary ends abruptly.)
"Berlin, May 2.—Yesterday an unfortunate Gentleman, without arms or legs, when passing the Royal Palace in his invalid chair, was attacked by a distinguished officer, who ran his sword through the heart of the unoffending civilian. The assassin was immediately promoted, as is usual in such cases, and is now Field Marshal Prince BLUTUNDRUHM VON SCHLACHTHAUSEN."—London Daily Papers. ”

“ TREE is that his Hamlet, entertaining an affectionate remembrance of the late YORICK, assumes a friendly and patronising air towards YORICK's successor, a Court Fool, apparently so youthful that he may still be supposed to be learning his business. So when His Royal Highness Hamlet has what he considers "a good thing" to say, Mr. TREE places the novice in jesting near himself, and pointedly speaks at him ”

“ And this notion is consistent with the character of a Prince who takes upon himself to lecture the Actors on their own art. There is no subtler touch in SHAKSPEARE's irony than his putting these instructions to players in the mouth of a noble amateur. Of the revival, as a whole, one may truthfully say, Ça donne à penser, and, indeed, the study of Hamlet is inexhaustible. ”

“ HICKS-BEACH's speech gave new and more serious turn to affairs. Concluded with Motion declaring Directors guilty of Breach of Privilege and sentencing them to admonition. But speech itself clearly made out that Directors were blameless; all the bother lying at door of Railway Servant who had been dismissed. Speech, in short, turned its back on Resolution. This riled the Radicals; not to be soothed even by Mr. G. interposing in favourite character as GRAND OLD PACIFICATOR. Storm raged all night ”

“ An Insurance Broker, Director of various Railway and other Companies, formerly Major of the 40th Lancashire Volunteers, a Trustee for three Church livings, and father of a large family, to be brought up on a Breach of Privilege is no slight matter. Indignity is aggravated by the locality. 'The Bar' is the last place in the world where the friends of JOHN WILLIAM MACLURE would think it likely to find him."
Business done.—In Committee on Small Holdings. ”

“ Yes, thirty thousand men, and some of them are going down fully equipped. Why, for instance, the Artists will march the whole way to the scene of the operations with their own regimental transport! And so will the 1st London Engineers. ”

“ Business done.—Cambrian Directors admonished for Breach of Privilege.
Tuesday, April 12.—House adjourns to-day for Easter Holidays; good many adjourned after Friday's Sitting; some waited to hear JOKIM bringing in his Budget last night. Few left to-day to wind up the business. HUGHES, gallant Colonel who represents Woolwich, here a few minutes ago. But he's gone too. "Sometimes," he said, with a far-away smile, "they call me 'the Woolwich Infant.' If I am such a very big gun, perhaps the best thing I can do is to go off." ”

“ All the coal in the world will be exhausted in something like four or five hundred years; and so, while there is yet time, I had better go somewhere where coal is a secondary consideration. What shall I do? ”

“ It is stated that the soldier who, on Friday last, fired at and killed a man who threatened him while on sentry duty before the barracks in the Wrangel-strasse, Berlin, has been promoted to the rank of corporal, for what is described as his correct conduct on the occasion. ”

“ And if they lack good sense, why care?
O JULIA, cease to wear a sack,
A garb all artists should attack,
In which both sense and beauty lack!
DRINKS AND DRAMAS.
("HENRY THE EIGHTH is a Soda-water Play."—Mr. Irving's Evidence before the Committee.)
Mr. Irving has now completed his list of refreshments suited to performances. They can be obtained, like Mr. GOSCHEN's reserve of shillings, "on application," which does not mean gratis.
Macbeth.—Very fine old Scotch.
Hamlet.—Bitters. ”

“ All who are interested in the theatrical celebrities of past times will do well to read a brief, indeed, a too brief paper, about DOROTHY JORDAN, written by FITZGERALD MOLLOY, for The English Illustrated Magazine of this month. ”

“ They're sailin' all over the country."
The truth was that Flick had organised the expedition with extraordinary secrecy and cunning. He had persuaded Rufus to join him, and the result was that we shot forty pheasants instead of the three hundred on which we had counted.
Now, my dear PLAU, I merely record this little story, and leave you to apply it. But I may remind you of incidents that touch you more nearly. Do you remember GORTON? Many years ago GORTON went to Oxford with a brilliant reputation. Every triumph that the University could confer was held to be within his grasp. ”

“ Business done.—In Committee on Small Holdings.
Tuesday.—Happy circumstance in the history of all Administrations that there is never lacking a friend on their own side to keep them on the right path. RADCLIFFE COOKE suddenly developed tendency towards personally conducting the Government. Hitherto appeared as a docile follower. New state of affairs arose in connection with Breach of Privilege by Cambrian Railway Directors. HICKS-BEACH last night gave notice to take into consideration Special Report of Select Committee charging Directors with Breach of Privilege. ”