Assize

“ The fortunate youth's first act [Pg 382] is to invent a cap of the shape of the ears of an ass, in order that the king may be able to conceal the deformity; and when the people see the king with a cap of this shape, it pleases them so much that they all adopt it ”

“ So one day the king came and asked Boots if it were true that he was man enough to keep the fish in the mill-dam, so that the troll could not harm them, 'for that's what they tell me you have said,' spoke the king. ”

“ The Ass and the Old Shepherd
A SHEPHERD, watching his Ass feeding in a meadow, was alarmed all of a sudden by the cries of the enemy. He appealed to the Ass to fly with him, lest they should both be captured, but the animal lazily replied, “Why should I, pray? Do you think it likely the conqueror will place on me two sets of panniers?” “No,” rejoined the Shepherd. “Then,” said the Ass, “as long as I carry the panniers, what matters it to me whom I serve?”
In a change of government the poor change nothing beyond the name of their master. ”

“ AN ascetic, with shaved head or braided hair and living in the cave of a mountain, may pretend to be four hundred years old, and, followed by a number of disciples with braided hair, halt in the vicinity of the capital city of the enemy. The disciples of the ascetic may make presentations of roots and fruits to the king and his ministers and invite them to pay a visit to the venerable ascetic. ”

“ I spent a time, till my visit was over, and I told the king all the troubles I went through, only I said nothing about my wife. And now you have the story.
And now when you go home, and the Slender Red Champion asks you for news of the death of Anshgayliacht and for the sword of light, tell him the way in which his brother was killed, and say you have the sword; and he will ask the sword from you. ”

“ He was a schoolmaster, and a wonderful figure of fun besides; he was lopsided, for he had one leg shorter than the other, and one moment he was as little as a boy, and in another, when he stood on his long leg, he was as tall and long as a Troll. ”

“ A Horse, proud of his fine trappings, met an Ass on the highway. The Ass being heavily laden moved slowly out of the way. "Hardly," said the Horse, "can I resist kicking you with my heels." The Ass held his peace, and made only a silent appeal to the justice of the gods. ”

“ In bonds of brass not easy to be loosed,
Nailing thee to this crag where no wight dwells,
Nor sound of human voice nor shape of man
Shall visit thee; but the sun-blaze shall roast
Thy flesh; thy hue, flower-fair, shall suffer change ”

“ Next morning the Giant got up cruelly early, and strode off to the wood; but he was hardly out of the house before Boots and the Princess set to work to look under the door-sill for his heart; but the more they dug, and the more they hunted, the more they couldn’t find it. ”

“ Young gentlemen of the House are to attend and serve till the latter Dinner, and then dine themselves.
"This day, the Server, Carver and Cup-bearer are to serve, as afore. After the first Course served in, the Constable Marshall cometh into the Hall, arrayed with a fair, rich, compleat Harneys, white and bright, and gilt; with a Nest of Fethers of all Colours upon his Crest or Helm, and a gilt Poleaxe in his hand: to whom is associate the Lieutenant of the Tower, armed with a fair white Armour, a Nest of Fethers in his Helm, and a like Poleaxe in his hand ”

“ That which comes out of the cloud, and of the gloom, also comes out of the ass; the soul of the ass is the sun, or the hero or heroine, or the riches which he conceals. The Açvinâu are often found in connection with the worthless horse, which afterwards becomes handsome by means of the ambrosia itself that the horse produces; the gandharvâs, a more nocturnal and cloudy form, if I may use the expression, of the solar or lunar hero, are in near relation with the ass, their alter ego, who enjoys the blessing of eternal youth. ”

“ The ensign replied, “No cape has warmed me more sweetly than the one I now wear, and I lay all my cares on Christ. But in God’s name, major, go back to the door and listen! The king might do himself some harm.”
“His Majesty would not fall on his own sword but longs for another’s.”
“Now I hear his steps even down here. They are getting still more violent and restless. ”

“ Then there was great joy and mirth all over the realm, and the old king was the gladdest of all of them, because he had got his darling back again. But when what Ritter Red and the eldest princess had done to Boots came out, the king asked to have them both rolled down a hill, each in a cask full of spikes and nails; but Boots and the youngest princess begged hard for them, and so they got off with life. ”

“ You go on the other side of the fir, and I will stand here. If we are not good enough to make our hands meet, it will be big enough; but mind you stretch out well. Stretch out well, do you hear?' said the lad, as he took out his thongs. As for the man, he did all the lad told him. ”

“ Sent on you from afar: some god will guard!
I too, for shrewd espial of their camp,
Have sent forth scouts, and confidence is mine
They will not fail nor tremble at their task,
And, with their news, I fear no foeman’s guile. ”

“ For a woman is leading on a mailed warrior, forged out of brass, conducting him decorously; and so she professes to be Justice, as the inscription tells: I will bring back this man, and he shall have the city of his fathers, and a dwelling in the palace. Such are their devices; and do thou thyself now determine whom it is that thou thinkest proper to send: since never at any time shalt thou censure me for my tidings; but do thou thyself determine the management of the vessel of the state.
Et. O heaven-frenzied, and great abomination of the gods! ”

“ THE Members of the Body once rebelled against the Belly. “You,” they said to the Belly, “live in luxury and sloth, and never do a stroke of work; while we not only have to do all the hard work there is to be done, but are actually your slaves and have to minister to all your wants. ”

“ Guy borrowed the old mans sword, and went directly up to the Castle gate, where the Giant dwelt, who, coming to the door, asked grimly, How he durst so boldly knock at the gates? vowing Page 150 he would beat his brains out. But Guy laughing at him, said, Sirrah, thou art quarrelsome; but I have a sword has often hewn such lubbards as you asunder:—At the same time laying his blade about the Giant's shoulders, that he bled abundantly, who being much enraged, flung his club at Guy with such force, that it beat him down; and before Guy could recover his fall Armarant had got up his club again. ”

“ Bares his long ass’s teeth, flattens his long ass’s ears, straightens his donkey neck,
And howls his pandemonium on the indignant air.
Yes, it’s a quandary.
Jesus rode on him, the first burden on the first beast of burden.
Love on a submissive ass.
So the tale began.
But the ass never forgets.
The horse, being nothing but a nag, will forget.
And men, being mostly geldings and knacker-boned hacks, have almost all forgot.
But the ass is a primal creature, and never forgets. ”

“ If the troll comes home he will put an end to you at once; he has three heads,” said she.
“I do not care if he has four,” said the soldier. “I am here, and here I shall remain.”
“Well, if you will be so headstrong, I must see if I can help you,” said the Princess.
She then told him to creep behind the big brewing vat which stood in the front hall; meanwhile she would receive the troll and scratch his heads till he went to sleep.
“And when I go out and call the hens you must make haste and come in,” she said. “But you must first try if you can swing the sword which is lying on the 184 table.” ”

“ The owner maintained that he had let the Ass only, and not his Shadow. The traveler asserted that he had, with the hire of the Ass, hired his Shadow also. The quarrel proceeded from words to blows, and while the men fought the Ass galloped off.
In quarreling about the shadow we often lose the substance.
The Horse and the Loaded Ass.
An idle Horse, and an Ass laboring under a heavy burden, were traveling the road together. The Ass, ready to faint under his heavy load, entreated the Horse to assist him, and lighten his burden, by taking some of it upon his back. ”

“ That's why I smoke and steam.'
"'Well, if I can do naught else, I can rive and rend,' said the Axe; and, with that, it fell to riving and rending all round about.
"This the Aspen stood by and saw.
"'Why do you rive and rend everything so, Mr. Axe?' said the Aspen.
"'Goodman Chanticleer has fallen into the ale-cask and drowned himself,' said the Axe; 'dame Partlet sits in the ingle, sighing and sobbing; the Handquern grinds and groans; the Chair creaks and cracks; the Door slams and bangs, and the Stove smokes and steams. ”

“ An Esquire, clothed in gold and scarlet, rides gallantly along, proudly waving his sword; a Chariot bears in triumph an officer in full armour; a Fool places his cap and bells under his arm that he may count upon his fingers. ”

“ In the arrow-play our horsemen would have the worst of it, for the armor of the asshuri is the better, and when it came to sword-strokes their close-marshaled ranks of trained swordsmen would cleave through our loose lines and scatter our men like chaff before the wind. ”

“ When they saw the use to which he was putting their gift, they cried, “Alas! alas! We are undone, but we are ourselves to blame. The little we gave has cost us all: had we not sacrificed the rights of the ash, we might ourselves have stood for ages.” ”

“ Now, two of you may go unto the village of Bethphage, and you will find an ass tied to a tree, and you will see a little colt near by.
6. Untie the ass and bring her here to me. If any one inquires why you take the ass, just say, The master has a need of her; and then the owner will come on with you.
7. And the disciples went as Jesus bade them go; they found the ass and colt a-near an open door; and when they would untie the ass the owner said Why would you take the ass away? ”

“ The ass, however, was by no means soothed by the meteor-like disappearance of the beasts of prey, and the gruesome dronings that, in spite of hard whacks, it indulged in for many minutes, betrayed the depth of its emotions and the cavernous nature of its interior organization. The ass, like the savage, has no perception of the picturesque. ”

“ And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thy hand, and they shall he as frontlets between thine eyes. And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates.
Assembly:
Thy word have I hid in my heart, that I might not sin against thee.
Take unto you the whole armor of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. ”

“ What do you say to accompanying me?’ The giant looked contemptuously at the tailor, and said: ‘What a poor wretched little creature you are!’ ‘That’s a good joke,’ answered the little tailor, and unbuttoning his coat he showed the giant the girdle. ‘There now, you can read what sort of a fellow I am.’ The giant read: ‘Seven at a blow;’ and thinking they were human beings the tailor had slain, he conceived a certain respect for the little man. ”

“ He began to play on it, and the watchmen fell a-dancing, till they lay down and gasped for breath.
So they sent soldiers and the guard on their way; but it was no better with them than with the watchmen. ”

“ At the end of the day, when the beasts were loosed from the yoke, the Ass said to the Ox, “Well, we’ve had a hard day: which of us is to carry the master home?” The Ox looked surprised at the question. ”

“ They had not gone far before they saw the owner of the axe pursuing them, when he who had picked up the axe, said, "We are undone." "Nay," replied the other, "keep to your first mode of speech, my friend; what you thought right then, think right now. Say 'I,' not 'We' are undone."
He who shares the danger ought to share the prize. ”

“ Then they went out to meet the foe; but they hadn’t got far from the palace before the lad got stuck fast in a bog with his hack. There he sat and dug his spurs in, and cried, “Gee up! gee up!” to his hack. And all the rest had their fun out of this, and laughed, and made game of the lad as they rode past him. But they were scarcely gone, before he ran to the lime-tree, threw on his coat of mail, and shook the bridle, and there came the Horse in a trice, and said: “Do now your best, and I’ll do mine.” ”

“ So they sent a deputation to him to protest against his action. He, however, advised them not to raise any objections. “What’s in a tuft of hair?” said he. “Let them have it if they want it. They can never be a match for you in strength.” ”

“ And on their breasts, shoulders, and foreheads, they make marks by threes with ashes, which they wear in accordance with the custom of their sect, saying that they do it to remind themselves that they have to turn to ashes: for when they die they burn their bodies, and so this ceremony continues among them. ”

“ If we read it as we would any similar piece, any other fable in which men and beasts speak to each other, we should say that there were some elements of the ludicrous [Pg 64] in the picture of the prophet rebuked by his ass. “And the ass saw the angel of the Lord standing in the way, and his sword drawn in his hand; and the ass turned aside out of the way and went into the field. And Balaam smote the ass to turn her into the way.” Just what any one would do to a “shying” animal, upon impulse. ”