Sayers

“ SAYERS or SAYER, JAMES (1748–1823) , caricaturist, born at Yarmouth in August 1748, was son of the master of a trading vessel. He was at first articled as a clerk in an attorney's office at Yarmouth, and rose to be a member of the borough council. He quitted his profession on inheriting a small fortune from his father. Having already shown some skill in writing satirical poems at Yarmouth, Sayers now gave full bent to his inclination by becoming a caricaturist. The political and theatrical worlds supplied him with themes. ”

“ The Australian took up his zither that had been brought in the boat and soon native songs of questionable delicacy were being roared out.
Here was Chalmers' opportunity. Sayers and the natives, between the attractions of the gin and the singing, were evidently ashore for a night of it. Tuan Yuck would be on the schooner alone, and sooner or later must succumb to the seduction of his opium pipe.
A voice called to him out of the darkness below him:
“Dinner is served, Sir Sentinel. Look out you don't fall coming down.” ”

“ In 1792, on his mother's death, Sayers moved to the Close at Norwich, and obtained an assured position in Norwich society. Among his friends and guests at various times were Southey, Sir James Mackintosh, Thomas Fanshawe Middleton, and Thomas Amyot. The death of an aunt in 1799 greatly increased his resources. In 1793 he published ‘Disquisitions, Metaphysical and Literary.’ He followed Hartley and Priestley in his metaphysical essays. The second edition of 1808 omits an essay on English metres. ”

“ THE WALLET OF KAI-LUNG
"I tripped right into it," said Wimsey's voice steadily, out of the blackness. "One sinks very fast. You'd better not come near, or you'll go too. We'll yell a bit. I don't think we can be very far from Grider's Hole."
"If your lordship will keep shouting," returned Mr. Bunter, "I think—I can—get to you," he panted, untying with his teeth the hard knot of a coil of string.
"Oy!" cried Lord Peter obediently. "Help! Oy! Oy!"
Mr. Bunter groped towards the voice, feeling cautiously before him with his walking-stick.
"Wish you'd keep away, Bunter," said Lord Peter peevishly. ”

“ The throat halyards were cast loose, a loop made in them for Tuan Yuck's foot, and, with Hamaku and Sayers hauling, Tuan Yuck, steadying himself by the peak halyard, was readily lifted to the side of Tomi, where he focused his glass on Safety Haven. ”

“ If the man who had last concealed his identity under the name of Pugsley, but whom I strongly suspected to be the notorious Michael Sayers, had really come out into the open once more, life would certainly possess a new interest for me during the next few few months. ”

“ I wonder how they are off for supplies. They've got plenty of water.”
“They'd pot us if we took the boat,” said Sayers. “Let Hamaku swim in. He may be able to sneak up between the rocks and get a look at them, and a line on how they are fixed for grub.”
Hamaku took his instructions willingly enough, reassured of Tuan Yuck's power to compel ultimate obedience, and slipped quietly over the side for the long swim that meant nothing to his aquatic prowess. Sayers watched him start, then announced his intention of eating breakfast. ”

“ They took up their positions, and laughed at each other as they moved round, each man to his right in order to avoid the other’s right hand. Then Heenan led and just reached Sayers’s 109 mouth, getting a hard reply which, amidst loud applause, drew first blood. They sparred for a little longer and then closed, when Sayers, as they used to say in these days, “got down easily.” A man was not allowed by the rules to go down without a blow, except in a close, in order to avoid punishment. ”

“ If you can make good with old Tom Sayers, you've no need to worry. He runs this whole plant as if it were a family. Knows every man in it. Calls most of the men by their first names. Gives bonuses and encouragement to the right ones, and fires the dead wood. Doesn't care a hang about anything [Pg 218] except making the Sayers car the best on earth because he's proud of it. ”

“ Sayers's last and most famous fight was with the American, John C. Heenan (the Benicia Boy) , for 200l. a side and the championship. They met at Farnborough on Tuesday, 17 April 1860, and fought thirty-seven rounds in two hours and six minutes. The event excited the keenest interest in both hemispheres (Times, 19 April 1860, leading article) , and was witnessed by persons in every rank of society. It was chronicled in ‘Punch,’ 28 April 1860, in ‘The Fight of Sayerius and Heenanus, a lay of ancient London.’ Heenan stood 6 ft. ”

“ Even that is doubtful. Good for shell only. We'll have to try another patch.”
Later in the afternoon Chalmers saw the boat take Tuan Yuck off to the schooner, leaving Sayers, now freed from his diving-garb, on the beach. The boat returned in a little while and the two natives carried up some stores and set them down on the sand. The Kanakas started to leave, but Sayers detained them and they went up to the clearing, coming back with material from which they started a fire blazing in the dusk. ”

“ I feel so happy, I shall explode. O Sugg, Sugg, how art thou suggified! Bunter, my shoes. I say, Parker, I suppose yours are rubber-soled. Not? Tut, tut, you mustn't go out like that. We'll lend you a pair. Gloves? Here. My stick, my torch, the lampblack, the forceps, knife, pill-boxes—all complete?"
"Certainly, my lord."
"Oh, Bunter, don't look so offended. I mean no harm. I believe in you, I trust you—what money have I got? That'll do. I knew a man once, Parker, who let a world-famous poisoner slip through his fingers, because the machine on the Underground took nothing but pennies. ”

“ The girl has more sense in her finger than you can muster in the whole of your carcasses. How did he get away?"
"By a trick," said Sayers. "He was taken to the rear to keep him from his mistress, and, on pretence of losing his stirrups, got the men beside him to come close, when he spurred their horses, striking the men at the same time. He was round in a minute and galloping back upon the road. Half a dozen of us went in pursuit, when the shots fired after him failed to stop him. We went the whole way back to Witley, and there, at the inn, found the horse lathered with foam. ”

“ Tuesday morning saw Lord Peter and a man in a velveteen jacket swishing merrily through seven acres of turnip-tops, streaked yellow with early frosts. A little way ahead, a sinuous undercurrent of excitement among the leaves proclaimed the unseen yet ever-near presence of one of the Duke of Denver's setter pups. Presently a partridge flew up with a noise like a police rattle, and Lord Peter accounted for it very creditably for a man who, a few nights before, had been listening to imaginary German sappers. The setter bounded foolishly through the turnips, and fetched back the dead bird. ”

“ His book on Crime was entertainin' enough as far as it went, but the fellow's got a bee in his bonnet. Thinks God's a secretion of the liver—all right once in a way, but there's no need to keep on about it. There's nothing you can't prove if your outlook is only sufficiently limited. Look at Sugg."
"I beg your pardon," said Parker, "I wasn't attending. Argentines are steadying a little, I see."
"Milligan," said Lord Peter.
"Oil's in a bad way. Levy's made a difference there. That funny little boom in Peruvians that came on just before he disappeared has died away again. ”

“ When lovers embrace, there seems no sound in the world but their own breathing. So the two men breathed face to face.
"As you like, of course, Lord Peter," said Sir Julian, courteously.
"Afraid I'm rather a silly ass," said Lord Peter, "but I never could abide these little gadgets. I had one once that went wrong and gave me a rotten bad time. They make me a bit nervous."
"In that case," replied Sir Julian, "it would certainly be better not to have the injection. It might rouse up just those sensations which we are desirous of avoiding. ”

“ Bunter, and of course I understand that you may find it to your advantage to be in a titled family, but there's less thought of that these days, and I will say, for a self-made man, no one could call Sir Reuben vulgar, and my lady at any rate is county—Miss Ford, she was, one of the Hampshire Fords, and both of them always most considerate."
"I agree with you, Mr. Graves—his lordship and me have never held with being narrow-minded—why, yes, my dear, of course it's a footmark, this is the washstand linoleum. A good Jew can be a good man, that's what I've always said. ”

“ Nothing's more painful. D'you mean to tell me a man would put up with that if he could afford to get the tooth filed?"
"Well, people are queer. I've known servants endure agonies rather than step over a dentist's doormat. How did you see that, Wimsey?"
"Had a look inside; electric torch," said Lord Peter. "Handy little gadget. Looks like a matchbox. Well—I daresay it's all right, but I just draw your attention to it. Second point: Gentleman with hair smellin' of Parma violet and manicured hands and all the rest of it, never washes the inside of his ears. ”

“ It was Bunter. Bunter, miraculously, with his arms full of scarlet and ermine, enveloping the shameful blue serge suit which had been a badge of disgrace.
"Allow me to offer my respectful congratulations, your grace."
"Bunter!" cried Lord Peter. "Great God, the man's gone mad! Damn you, man, take that thing away," he added, plunging at a tall photographer in a made-up tie.
"Too late, my lord," said the offender, jubilantly pushing in the slide.
"Peter," said the Duke. "Er—thanks, old man."
"All right," said his lordship. "Very jolly trip and all that. You're lookin' very fit. ”

“ Except that it is odd that a gentleman who was too flurried or unwell to fold his clothes as usual should remember to clean his teeth and put his boots out. Those are two things that quite frequently get overlooked, my lord."
"If you mean anything personal, Bunter," said Lord Peter, "I can only say that I think the speech an unworthy one. It's a sweet little problem, Parker mine. Look here, I don't want to butt in, but I should dearly love to see that bedroom tomorrow. ”

“ I see the ace of spades—upside-down, Bunter."
"And what then, my lord?"
"Nothing. I look into the future and I see a blank. The gypsy has spoken."
"I will bear it in mind, my lord."
"Do. If my prediction is not fulfilled, I will give you a new camera. And now I'm going round to see that fellow who calls himself Sleuths Incorporated, and get him to put a good man on to keep watch at Charing Cross. And after that, I'm going down to Chelsea and I don't quite know when I shall be back. You'd better take the afternoon off. Put me out some sandwiches or something, and don't wait up if I'm late." ”

“ Ring for anything you want. It is a pity you didn't arrive in time to see Gerald."
"Oh, that's all right," said Lord Peter cheerfully; "I'll look him up in quod. Y'know, it's rather a good idea to keep one's crimes in the family; one has so many more facilities. I'm sorry for poor old Polly, though. How is she?"
"She must not be disturbed today," said the Duchess with decision.
"Not a bit of it," said Lord Peter; "she'll keep. Today Parker and I hold high revel. Today he shows me all the bloody footprints—it's all right, Helen, that's not swearin', that's an adjective of quality. ”

“ In fact—there you are again—Bunter has retired into photographic life for the evening. I haven't a roof to cover me. I have been wandering round like the what d'you call it bird, which has no feet——"
"I'm sorry you were driven to such desperation as to seek asylum in our poverty-stricken hovel," said George, with a sour laugh.
Wimsey began to wish he had not come. Mrs. Fentiman looked vexed.
"You needn't answer that," she said, with an effort to be light, "there is no answer."
"I'll send it to Aunt Judit of 'Rosie's Weekly Bits'," said Wimsey. "A makes a remark to which there is no answer. ”

“ Overhead the noise of the gramophone and the shuffling of feet bore witness that the dance was going on. Stray passers-by crossing the Heath noted that the people in the lonely house were making a night of it again.
"Well," said Wimsey, "am I to go on?"
From beneath the mask the President's voice sounded as though he were grimly smiling.
"My lord," he said, "your story fills me with regret that you are not, in fact, a member of our Society. Wit, courage, and industry are valuable to an association like ours. I fear I cannot persuade you? ”

“ A motor-horn sounded distantly.
"I give in," she said. "We must let him go. Take the ropes off him. You will free him, won't you?" she went on, turning piteously to Wimsey. "Devil as you are, you are not such a devil as that! You will go straight back and save him!"
"Let him go, nothing!" broke in one of the men. "He doesn't go to peach to the police, my lady, don't you think it. The President's done in, that's all, and we'd all better make tracks while we can. It's all up, boys. Chuck this fellow down the cellar and fasten him in, so he can't make a row and wake the place up. ”

“ Freemantle. If this were the States," he added, "I'd be much inclined to suspect myself of having put Sir Reuben in a safe place. But we can't do business that way in your old country; no, ma'am."
"It must be exciting work doing business in America," said Lord Peter.
"It is," said Mr. Milligan. "I guess my brothers are having a good time there now. I'll be joining them again before long, as soon as I've fixed up a little bit of work for them on this side."
"Well, you mustn't go till after my bazaar," said the Duchess.
Lord Peter spent the afternoon in a vain hunt for Mr. Parker. ”

“ The wad of paper was still in his hand, and he was about to fling it into the fire, when a word caught his eye. He unrolled the paper. As he read it his eyebrows went up and his mouth pursed itself into an indescribable expression of whimsical enlightenment. Bunter, returning with the hot water, found his master transfixed, the paper in one hand, and his socks in the other, and whistling a complicated passage of Bach under his breath.
"Bunter," said his lordship, "I am, without exception, the biggest ass in Christendom. When a thing is close under my nose I can't see it. ”