Wedding ring

“ As the symbolism of the marriage will be spread with the long veil and bound into the wedding ring, jewels should be modest and few.
Earclips should be small, and carefully chosen, of diamonds in simple design. If a bracelet is worn, it should be on the right arm. The left arm and hand should be bare of ornament, the engagement ring being transferred, before the service, to stay on the right hand until the groom has slipped the wedding band on his bride’s finger. No wrist watch should be worn ”

“ RINGS, AND LOVE TOKENS Special wedding-rings, as we understand them, were not used at an early period, the espousal ring being employed at the wedding ceremony also. At a later time, a signet was set in the anulus pronubus, or betrothal ring, to signify that the spouse was to have the right of sealing up the household goods, and occasionally a small key formed part of the ring, with a similar significance. ”

“ Two rings should not be worn at the same time on the same hand, except the wedding ring, which in due time comes to slide along the same finger as the engagement ring to mark the fulfilment of the first ring’s promise. As they are to be boon companions for a long, long time, the wedding ring should be of the same metal as the engagement ring. The wide wedding band, though almost universal at the beginning of this century and returning to popularity, has certain disadvantages. ”

“ Bay leaves were also used for a similar purpose, but not so generally as the Rosemary.
Wedding rings were used both by the Greeks and Romans, but then only at the ceremony of betrothal, and not that of marriage. The Anglo-Saxon bridegroom at the betrothal gave a Wed, or pledge, and a ring was placed on the maiden’s right hand, where it remained until marriage, and was then transferred to the left. During the reigns of George I. and George II., the wedding ring was often worn on the thumb. ”

“ Each member of an engaged couple presents the other with a plain gold ring at the time of “plighting their troth,” as we observe in the novels, which is worn upon the third finger of the left hand until after the marriage, when it becomes a wedding ring and is transferred to the right hand. ”

“ Clare suffered her glove to be drawn off. The ring slid down her long thin finger, and settled comfortably.
"It does!" Mrs. Doria whispered. To find a wedding ring is open to any woman; but to find a wedding-ring that fits may well cause a superstitious emotion. Moreover, that it should be found while walking in the neighbourhood of the identical youth whom a mother has destined for her daughter, gives significance to the gentle perturbation of ideas consequent on such a hint from Fortune. ”

“ In the Riazan Government, water that has been dropped through a wedding-ring is supposed to have certain merits as a lotion; and at a Little-Russian marriage the bride is bound to give the bridegroom to drink from a cup of wine in which a ring has been put. From the mention of a ring made in the ‘Dodola Songs,’ and in others referring to storm and rain, it is supposed that a golden ring, in mythical language, is to be taken as a representation of the lightning’s heavenly gold. ”

“ The father of the bride, who officiated, received the ring from the bridegroom, ascertained that it was the young man’s own property lawfully acquired, examined and then delivered it to the president of the synagogue. He, also, examined and handed the ring back to the minister, who, finally, performed the ceremony.
§ 12. Some married women are so rigidly superstitious or firm that they will not draw off their wedding-ring to wash or at any other time: extending the expression “till death do us part” even to the ring. ”

“ Maximilian, just before his betrothal to Mary of Burgundy, daughter of Charles the Bold. This letter runs: “At the betrothal your Grace must have a ring set with a diamond and also a gold ring. Moreover, in the morning your Grace must bestow upon the bride some costly jewels.” [392]
From time immemorial we have had wedding-rings, but it seems that in view of the great number of divorces now granted we might well introduce the custom of giving “divorce-rings,” for at no time in the history of the Christian world have there been more divorces than at the present day. ”

“ When a lover leaves his mistress for a time, he gives her a golden ring (pérsten’, a signet-ring, or one set with gems—from perst, a finger) and receives from her a gold ring in exchange (Kol’ tsë, a plain circlet like our own wedding-ring, from Kolo, a circle) . ”

“ To bear out his view, it would be necessary to prove that a signet ring had originally been used for the wedding ring—a matter of no slight difficulty, not to say impossibility.
What I take to be the real meaning of the ring as a part of the marriage ceremony, I will now give. It has a far higher meaning in the ceremony, and a more important duty to perform than merely to signify the admission of the wife into the counsels of the husband. Its office is to teach her the duty she owes to her husband, rather than the privilege of admission into his counsels. ”

“ She then said she must, before I left her this morning, give me her wedding-ring as her last gift; and accordingly, sending for the little trinket-box in which she kept it, she herself put the ring on my finger.’
The value, even to death, attached to wedding-rings has been frequently shown. In a testamentary document made at Edinburgh Castle by Mary, Queen of Scots, before the birth of her son James, and when under the impression that she would die in childbed, among numerous bequests, she enumerates her rings, of which she had a large number. ”

“ These appear to settle the contention as to the proper finger for the wedding-ring.
‘Rings in modern times,’ remarks Madame de Barrera, ‘have been made in some countries Love’s telegraph. If a gentleman wants a wife, he wears a ring on the first finger of the left hand; if he be engaged, he wears it on the second finger; if married, on the third; and on the fourth if he never intends to be married. When a lady is not engaged she wears a hoop or diamond on her first finger ”

“ And at the marriage ceremony, the ring is put on to the thumb and the first two fingers, whilst the names of "The Father, and the Son, and the Holy Ghost" are pronounced. Thus the third is the first vacant finger, and the ring-finger. The wedding-ring is worn on the left hand to signify the subjection of the wife to her husband. The right hand signifies power, independence, authority; according to the words:
"The salvation of his right hand is in powers." ”

“ Narrow gold rings with diamond settings are also used, closely resembling the type of diamond ring that has been worn as a guard-ring for many years.
That men should be forced to wear wedding rings is a proposition recently agitated in London. Public attention was called to this question by newspaper reports to the effect that a young lady had testified at a divorce suit that she had innocently encouraged the attentions of a married man, because she had no means of knowing that he was married. ”

“ Wood, in his ‘Wedding Day in all Ages and Countries,’ observes ‘that the Irish peasantry have a general impression that a marriage without the use of a gold ring is not legal. At a town in the south-east of Ireland, a person kept a few gold wedding-rings for hire, and when parties who were too poor to [Pg 174] purchase a ring of the necessary precious metal were about to be married, they obtained the loan of one, and paid a small fee for the same, the ring being returned to the owner immediately after the ceremony. ”

“ It is unlucky for a bride to reverse her wedding ring on her wedding day.
If a bride can be persuaded to remove her ring and have some bride cake passed through the ring, and the cake, so passed, put under the pillow, the person will dream of her future spouse. ”

“ A wedding ring would ruin them, and we have our little prejudice in favor of that magic circlet. The wedding ring may not be artistic—that is the Parisian answer to our plaints—but until we have discovered something that will aptly take its place, we prefer it. ”

“ It is customary for a widow to remove the engagement ring and wedding ring of her first husband before the day of her second wedding. The sight of them cannot be in any way pleasant to her new husband, and they may be a source of sorrowful memory to her. ”

“ The dark eyes smiled back a sympathetic glance from the mirror, and then a weary sigh of anxiety clouded the beautiful eyes with trouble. Why?
The conversation about the removed ring had been resumed in the morning, and in compliance with the husband’s request, the young bride had again taken off her wedding-ring, in order that he might himself replace it on her fair finger; this unfortunately happened on the upper piazza, and in the usual loving conflict with which youthful couples adjust all matters between themselves, the ring had fallen into the garden and mysteriously disappeared. ”

“ Somewhat distantly related to the betrothal or wedding rings were those given by lovers to the objects of their affection. Of such a ring the Roman poet Ovid writes, apostrophizing it as “a ring soon destined to encircle the finger of a beauteous girl, a ring having no worth except the love of the giver.” It was to be a gift to the poet’s ladylove Corinna. [334] The ring sent by [194] a fair lady, as a token of love to a handsome soldier, in the “Miles Gloriosus” of Plautus was also of this class. ”

“ In the “British Apollo” it is said that, during the time of George the First, the wedding-ring, though placed in the ceremony of the marriage upon the fourth finger, was worn upon the thumb. [345]
The use of the ring has become so common in England that poor people will not believe the marriage to be good without one; and the notion also is that it must be of gold. At Worcester (England) on one occasion, the parties were so poor that they used a brass ring. The bride’s friends indignantly protested that the ring ought to have been of gold ”

“ Not infrequently the friends of the newly wedded pair answer an announcement card by a brief note addressed to the bride or to the groom. This, of course, is usually done only when the friend lives at a distance.
Q. What is the proper procedure of a best man in regard to the handling of the wedding ring?
A. The best man carries in his right-hand waistcoat pocket the wedding ring and in his left-hand pocket the fee for the clergyman. He joins the groom in the room set aside for their use and walks with him to the spot where the marriage is to take place. ”

“ Previously provide yourself with a piece of brass wire pointed at both ends, and bent round so as to form a ring about the size of a wedding-ring, which conceal in your hand; then commence your performance by borrowing from a gentleman a silk pocket-handkerchief, and from a lady a wedding-ring; request some person to hold two of the corners of the handkerchief, and another to hold the other two, keeping them at full stretch. You next exhibit the wedding-ring to the company, and announce to them that you will make it pass through the handkerchief. ”

“ In speaking of wedding-rings, we learn that these important symbols have not always been manufactured from the precious metal, gold. We are told that in lieu of a ring the church key has often been used; and Walpole tells of an instance where a curtain-ring was employed. The Duke of Hamilton fell so violently in love with the younger of the celebrated Misses Gunning at a party in Lord Chesterfield's house, that two days after he sent for a parson to perform the marriage ceremony; but as the Duke had neither license nor ring, the clergyman refused to act. ”

“ But when it comes to jewelry, to selecting the jewels that are appropriate to the occasion, most women have only the haziest idea. Yet if they discover that they are not adorned in keeping with the function, their day is clouded.
En Route
In traveling, by plane or even by train for a weekend in the country, only tailored jewelry should be worn. Large diamond pieces are definitely out of bounds, even in the subdued hum of a dining car. I repeat that the one exception, now and forever, is the combination of the engagement ring and the wedding ring. This is always as appropriate as pleasant. ”

“ In Brand’s ‘Popular Antiquities’ we read: ‘Many married women are so rigid, not to say superstitious, in their notions concerning their wedding-rings, that neither when they wash their hands, nor at any other time, will they take the ring off the finger ”

“ The minister and I entered the chapel, where I explained to him the form of the Episcopal service, and to save time enacted the part of the groom, the bride and the other necessary characters. Much delighted with this service, he was proceeding finely when we came to the giving of the ring. “Oh, how about the ring,” he asked. Here was another dilemma. Shades of the Goddess of Matrimony! A ring! and in camp, where jewelry was conspicuous only by its absence! My only ring, a garnet cluster, would not serve for a wedding ring, yet a ring must be had. ”

“ The ring is constructed in twin or double hoops, one side being flat, the other convex. On the lower hand is represented a heart. On the flat side of the hoops are engraved in Roman capitals, ‘Usé de Vertu.’ This ring is probably not later than Queen Elizabeth’s reign.
A plain gemmel wedding-ring, with an inscription inside each hoop, which the Prince Regent, afterwards George IV., had given to Mrs. Fitzherbert, was exhibited, with the lady’s [Pg 316] miniature, at the Loan Collection of precious objects at the South Kensington Museum in 1872. ”

“ In God and thee my joy shall be.
Absence tries love.
Virtue surpasseth riches.
Let virtue rest within thy breast.
I lyke my choyce.
As circles five by art compact shews but one ring in sight,
So trust uniteth faithful mindes with knott of secret might;
Whose force to breake no right but greedie death possesseth power,
As time and sequels well shall prove. My ringe can say no more.
(The Earl of Hertford’s wedding-ring consisted of five links, the four inner ones containing the above posies of the Earl’s making. See page 318, ‘Betrothal and Wedding Rings.’)
Joye sans fyn. ”