Stepfather

“ The stepfather is a broken reed, and the mother is a child herself; however, you place your pride and your prejudice first, and that’s the end of the business. You will go back to town, she to the North—a very effectual separation! ”

“ I said. “Remember that I am old enough to be your father; that I knew you when you were three years old. I may surely ask such questions. But you are right; one must do your mother justice. She was certainly thinking of her second marriage.”
“You have not forgiven her that!” said the Countess, very gravely.
“Have you?” I asked, more lightly.
“I don’t judge my mother. That is a mortal sin. My stepfather was very kind to me.”
“I remember him,” I said; “I saw him a great many times—your mother already received him.” ”

“ We all know the stiff-necked and humorous old-fashioned nurse, so conventional and yet so original, so dependent and yet so independent. We all know the intrusive stepfather, the abstract strange male, coarse, handsome, sulky, successful ”

“ There are faces that stand out upon memory with some kindness in them for a pitiable little outcast. Chiefly, of course, my stepfather, who was as serviceably good to me as a man's unreasoning terror of a woman's temper permitted him to be. ”

“ But I know you can get a grip of things that many much older girls could never hope to. That's why I want to tell you the things I'm going to. Now you've worked it out in your mind that your stepfather is just a heartless, selfish creature who has no sort of use for you, and just wants to forget your existence. ”

“ If the parties are afflicted with a stepfather or stepmother who refuses to consent to their marriage, the approval of the family council will suffice as these persons cannot always be presumed to have at heart the interests of their step-children. ”

“ My stepfather had always been a cheery, kindly, generous man, one of those who love to see people enjoy themselves, and to have things done handsomely, and had kept house in a free, abundant, hospitable manner ”

“ Now her marriage would mean, of course, the loss of a hundred a year, so what does her stepfather do to prevent it? He takes the obvious course of keeping her at home, and forbidding her to seek the company of people of her own age. ”

“ Your stepfather has gone to the limit to show you how well he desires for you, and how free of his authority he wants you to be. There is another generous act of his that will be made clear to you when the time comes. But that is for the future—not now. His last word to me," he went on, picking up a letter, "when he sent me the deed duly signed, was: 'Tell this little girl when you hand her these things, it isn't my wish to trouble her with an authority which can have little enough appeal for her. ”

“ Surely there could be little to cause trouble or anxiety to such a man? he, if any one, could afford to stand the scrutiny of the world, could ignore or laugh at what the world might say respecting his choice of a wife! And what could the world say? The secrecy which had been maintained about the whole matter had been perfect, so perfect as to make him easy about the fact that the dead man whom Alice had believed to be her husband was his stepfather. ”

“ Your step-mother is not good enough for you. I—your father—am not good enough for you. We are all too strait-laced, too tied hand and foot by the laces of respectability, to serve as guide or check on such a headstrong piece of goods as yourself. ”

“ Children universally address their father's brother by the title of father, and their mother's brother by that of uncle; their mother's sister is called mother, and their father's sister aunt. The same relative designations extend to the step-parents, relatives, and to those of the grand-parents. The children of brothers and sisters address each other by the titles of brother and sister. Step-parents treat their step-children with as much kindness and attention as their own ”

“ I would sooner have our watchman for my father than him.'
'Nay, lass, you don't mean that, and I can't have you speak like that of my brother,' said her uncle.
'He's only your step-brother, and you don't get on with him any too well yourself. But don't look so solemn. I'll be quite good and proper if you'll let that twinkle come into your eye again; it isn't you without a twinkle.'
Her uncle laughed good-humouredly as he took his young niece's arm and followed his sister-in-law into the drawing-room. ”

“ On the face of the statement the question involved is not one of parentage, but of marriage-relationship. A man calls his mother’s sister his mother, and she calls him her son, although she did not bear him. This is the case in the Malayan, Turanian and Ganowánian systems. Whether we have consanguine or punaluan marriages, a man’s mother’s sister is the wife of his reputed father. She is his step-mother as near as our system furnishes an analogue; and among ourselves a step-mother is called mother, and she calls her step-son, son. ”

“ Likewise: “If among brothers born of one father, one should have a son, Manu said all those brothers would be possessed of sons by means of that son.”231 But this seems to apply only to the son born to the eldest, for if a younger brother married before the eldest and performed the daily sacrifices, he sent himself, his brother, and his wife “to Hell.”232
The eldest, if he performs his duty, “causes the family to flourish” and “is most honoured among men.” He alone is “duty-born,” through him his father “pays his debt”; other sons are only “born of desire.” ”

“ BELINDA (pleadingly to DEVENISH) . Can't you stop him?
DEVENISH. Look here, Baxter, another word from you and you'll never get to sixty.
BAXTER. And then there's Miss—er—Delia. In the event of our marrying, Mrs. Tremayne, she, I take it, would be my step-daughter.
BELINDA. I don't think she would trouble us much, Mr. Baxter. I have an idea that she will be getting married before long. (She glances at DEVENISH, who returns her look gratefully.)
BAXTER. None the less, the fact would be disturbing. I have never yet considered myself seriously as a step-father. ”

“ The clause pictures for us the family group as bound together by paternal rites (sacris paternis) . The grandfather is alive and is the paterfamilias. A son who is a filiusfamilias (i.e., as we shall see presently, not an emancipated son) has married and brought into the mansio, or family homestead of the grandfather, property which he had with his wife. [282] This, not having been ‘defined’ on marriage, so as to keep it separate, has become, in the phrase of the Latin text, ‘added to the property of the grandfather.’ The husband has died leaving several sons, it matters not how many. ”

“ Why then, if man's appetite is to be his sole guide, may not the son select his father's wife, no older than himself, to be the guardian of his children; and pretend that no one can possibly feel so much affection for them as his step-mother and be so suited to be their guide? Then if she bears children it is to one who ought to consider himself her son, and her children would be brothers and sisters to his children. ”

“ Your dear papa was my brother, and you, my dears, are my nephew and niece. Come to my arms, and be assured that, as far as I can, I will make up for the loss you have sustained. I will love you deeply, fondly, ardently; and for my brother’s sake, and that of your kind, gentle, and loving mother, who was as dear to me as my dear sister Gwenfan, who was the light and joy of our homes, and for your own sakes, I will be your guide, your friend, your counsellor and stay. ”

“ What might seem the exaggerated affection of a father cannot be suspected from the pen of a stepmother. Be sure, my brother, that my happiest days will be those that come to you in consequence of the alliance that is about to unite us. ”

“ The furrows of reflection and care contracted the youthful cheek, and gave a sort of supernatural wildness to the ever watchful eye. During this period, my father had married another fellow-servant, who loved him less, and knew better how to manage his passion, than my mother. She likewise proving with child, they agreed to keep a shop: my step-mother, if, being an illegitimate offspring, I may venture thus to characterize her, having obtained a sum of a rich relation, for that purpose. ”

“ We learn that the father’s brother resembles the father and conclude that the uncle stands for the father in that dream. The conversation between himself and the uncle is a repetition of old reproaches. For a long time he was unable to work and at the present time he is unable to help in his father’s business. He finds a ready excuse in his illness. The incestuous relation to his mother is fairly obvious. The inhibitions which developed so that he is unable to make himself useful in his father’s business, are due partly to his hatred of the father as a rival. ”

“ That's what I call a discriminating child, mamma. It isn't every boy of five who knows a possible stepmother when he sees her. I am proud of Jay. I wish I were as confident of his father's discretion. Poor man, how he will be cajoled! How he will learn to reverence the opinion of Mrs. Eustace, how he will dote on the airy graces of the daughter. I wish you could see them, mamma. They rather affect the attitude of sisters. ”

“ And suddenly the door creaked and flew open, and a great heavy chest was pushed in, and behind it came the step-daughter, radiant and beautiful, in a dress all glittering with silver and gold. For a moment the step-mother’s eyes were dazzled. Then she called to her husband: ‘Old man, yoke the horses at once into the sledge, and take my daughter to the same field and leave her on the same spot exactly; ‘and so the old man took the girl and left her beneath the same tree where he had parted from his daughter. ”

“ A man may also marry his step-sister on the mother’s side, that is the daughter of his own mother by another husband either prior to or subsequent to his father, the step-sister being of a different sept. ”

“ We conclude that a step-father to the king, whether genuine or only a counterfeit, is at least something of a relief after the swarms of nephews, cousins, and uncles, and so order him to be shown in He proves to be a corpulent little man about sixty, who advances up the bricked walk toward us, making about three extra profound salaams to the rod and smiling in a curious, apprehensive manner, as though not quite assured of his reception. About a dozen long-robed mollahs and seyuds follow with timid hesitancy in his wake. ”

“ If this be not so, then the very next marriage which is given, where the man may not marry his father's second wife, or, as it is commonly called, his step-mother, in the case of the woman would be, "but the woman may marry her step-father." ”

“ I am alive and well, and I hope you are alive and well, and that all the family are thriving, and I beg you to greet my father, my stepmother, my brother Andrew, my sister, little Peter, and all my near ones from me. ”

“ We are all handsome in the family; even I myself, I have had my successes, the memories of which still charm me. It is my intention, my nephew, to make of you my heir. I am not very well content with my other nephew. ”

“ The angel disappeared, and the king reigned there in great happiness. [46]
[Contents]
THE WICKED STEPMOTHER
There was once on a time a stepmother who hated her stepdaughter exceedingly, because she was more beautiful than her own daughter whom she had brought with her into the house. By-and-by the father learned also to hate his own child; he scolded her, and beat her, in order to please his wife. One day his wife said to him, “Let us send your daughter away. Let her look out for herself in the world.” Upon this the man asked, “Where can we send her? Where can the poor girl go alone?” ”

“ She leaned over the gleaming water and drew her polished hand across the surface.
"Why do you ask me these questions?" she murmured. "Are you displeased?"
"Tell me about your step-father," I insisted. "Does he look as I do? Does he dress, does he speak, as I do? Is he American?"
"American? I don't know. He does not dress as you do, and he does not look as you do. ”

“ The father, only too often swayed by the will of the stepmother, perhaps for his own peace and comfort sake, becomes gradually indifferent to the feelings and sufferings of his children, and at last entirely forgets his duties as a parent. ”

“ Your step-mother means to do the right thing both by you and the boys. You will have a splendid time, so just do cheer up and be thankful for the blessings which Providence has showered upon your head. ”

“ I dare to say that my stepmother blessed the young gentlemen as heartily in her mind as I did, for I can’t conceive how she and I should have faced one another, or how we should have conversed, had we been left to ourselves. ”

“ I must come a-wooing to you, sir.
Steph. A-wooing, sweet, for what?
Wife. For your brother: O, 'tis unmeet
For souls fram'd by one square to grow uneven!
'Tis like a war 'mongst the great lights of heaven;
One cannot lose his beauty, but the other
Suffers eclipse—so brother against brother.
Steph. Wouldst have me kiss him that would kill me?
Wife. Would you kill a man lying at your feet? ”

“ Steph. If him thou pity, 'tis thine own decay.
O. Fos. Bread, bread! some charitable man remember the poor prisoners: bread for the tender mercy! one penny!
Rob. O listen, uncle!
That's my poor father's voice.
Steph. There let him howl.
Get you gone, and come not near him.
Rob. O my soul,
What tortures dost thou feel! Earth ne'er shall find
A son so true, yet forc'd to be unkind. ”

“ But it is a woman's danger to be petty and mean, and stepmothers are proverbial all the world over, and this one's heart was not as her first smiles were. As the days and weeks grew into months, the step-mother began to treat the motherless girl unkindly and to try and come between the father and child. ”