Joseph Plumb Martin

“ I told him I had much rather not, as, possibly, it might injure his character to be seen dancing with a private soldier; but it would not signify, a jig we must have at all events, and he got hold of my hand and began to whistle, and I began to dance, and a fine jig I suppose he thought we had.—The plague seize his old carcass, I wish he was twisted up fifteen miles above the seven stars, there to remain till every hair of his head was a meteor, and every limb a comet. ”

“ I concluded, that as most or all the troops had passed us, to stay where I then was, and wait the coming up of the baggage of our troops, thinking that the guard or drivers might have directions where to find them. Our baggage happening to be quite in the rear, while we were waiting we had an opportunity to see the baggage of the army pass. When that of the middle States passed us, it was truly amusing to see the number and habiliments of those attending it; of all specimens of human beings, this group capped the whole; a carravan of wild beasts could bear no comparison with it. ”

“ I never was killed in the army; I never was wounded but once; I never was a prisoner with the enemy; but I have seen many that have undergone all these; and I have many times run the risk of all of them myself; but, reader, believe me, for I tell a solemn truth, that I have felt more anxiety, undergone more fatigue and hardships, suffered more every way, in performing one of those tedious marches, than ever I did in fighting the hottest battle was ever engaged in, with the anticipation of all the other calamities I have mentioned added to it. ”

“ The poor soldiers had hardships enough to endure, without having to starve; the least that could be done was to give them something to eat. "The labourer is worthy of his meat" at least, and he ought to have it for his employer's interest, if nothing more. But, as I said, there were other hardships to grapple with.—How many times have I had to lie down like a dumb animal in the field, and bear "the pelting of the pitiless storm;" cruel enough in warm weather, but how much more so in the heart of winter. ”

“ The soldiers consider it cruel to be thus vilified, and it is cruel as the grave, to any man, when he knows his own rectitude of conduct; to have his hard services, not only debased and underrated, but scandalized and vilified. But the Revolutionary soldiers are not the only people that endure obloquy, others as meritorious, and perhaps more deserving than they, are forced to submit to ungenerous treatment. ”

“ When a man has got his bane in his country's cause, let him die like an old horse or dog, because he can do no more!—The only wish I would wish such men, would be, to let them have exactly the same treatment which they would give to others.—I saw but little chance of escaping from this very humane gentleman by fair means, so I told my two comrades to stick by me and keep together, and we would get from them by some means or other during the evening. ”

“ Andre had every indulgence allowed him that could be granted with propriety;—see the contrast—let all who pity Andre so much, look at it and be silent.
We were frequently alarmed while lying at Dobb's ferry; being so few and at a distance from the main army, we had constantly to be on the look out, but never happened to come in contact with the enemy, although they very frequently made us believe we should. ”

“ I have heard it remarked by the old farmers, that when beasts are first transferred from one place to another, that if they keep them without food for two or three days, it will go far towards wonting them to their new situation. Perhaps it might be so thought by our commanders. Be that as it would, I got nothing, as I have said, till the second day I had been with them; we then drew, if I remember right, two days rations of our good old diet, salt shad, and as we had not, as yet, associated ourselves into regular messes, as is usual in the army, each man had his fish divided out by himself. ”

“ I never wished to do any one an injury, through malice, in my life; nor did I ever do any one an intentional injury while I was in the army, unless it was when sheer necessity drove me to it, and my conscience bears me witness, that innumerable times I have suffered rather than take from any one what belonged of right to them, even to satisfy the cravings of nature. ”

“ The thoughts of the service still haunted me after the troops were gone, and the town clear of them; but what plan to form to get the consent of all, parents and grandparents, that I might procure thereby to myself, the (to me then) bewitching name of a soldier, I could not devise. Sometimes I thought I would enlist at all hazards, let the consequences be what they would; then again I would think how kind my grandparents were to me, and ever had been, my grandsire in particular: I could not bear to hurt their feelings so much. ”

“ As soon as it was fairly light, we saw their boats coming out of a creek or cove, on the Long-Island side of the water, filled with British soldiers. When they came to the edge of the tide, they formed their boats in line. They continued to augment their forces from the Island until they appeared like a large clover field in full bloom. And now was coming on the famous Kipp's Bay affair, which has been criticised so much by the Historians of the Revolution. ”

“ It was in our power to take cattle or horses, hay, or any other produce from them; but we felt that we had done wrong in listening to the tattle of malicious neighbours, and for that cause we refrained from meddling with any property of theirs ever after. So that good came to them out of intended evil.
After we had received our bread, cheese and whiskey, we struck across the fields into the highway again. It was now nearly sunset, and as soon as we had got into the road, the youngest of the girls, and handsomest and chattiest, overtook us again, riding on horseback with a gallant. ”

“ One of the soldiers complaining of thirst to his officer; look at that man, said he, pointing to me, he is not thirsty, I will warrant it. I felt a little elevated to be stiled a man. While resting here, which was not more than twenty minutes or half an hour, the Americans and British were warmly engaged within sight of us. What were the feelings of most or all the young soldiers at this time, I know not, but I know what were mine;—but let mine or theirs be what they might, I saw a Lieutenant who appeared to have feelings not very enviable ”

“ After we had been two or three days at this invigorating business, the troops were inspected by General Stuben; when he found out our situation, he ordered us off immediately. "You may as well knock those men on the head," said he, "as keep them there, they will die if kept there much longer, and they can do no more if you knock their brains out." He had more sense than our officers; but they did not feel the hardships which we had to undergo, and of course, cared but little, if any thing at all, about us. ”

“ You ought to drive on, said they, you are competent for the business; rid the country at once of her invaders. Poor simple souls! It was very easy for them to build castles in the air, but they had not felt the difficulty of making them stand there. It was easier, with them, taking whole armies in a warm room, and by a good fire, than enduring the hardships of one cold winter's night upon a bleak hill without clothing or victuals.
If the Revolutionary army was really such an useless appendage to the cause ”

“ I determined after I had crossed the river, to take that road and hazard the consequences. I had got about half way on my journey, when just at night, I passed a house, which before the war had been a tavern. I passed by the house, thoughtlessly, and saw nobody, but as I passed the horse shed, I observed several horses standing under it, caparisoned like dragoon horses. I hurried on as fast as I could to get out of sight, but I had not got many rods by the house, when I saw a man come out with a fusee in his hand, and otherwise equipped like a soldier, who calling after me, bid me stop. ”

“ Many murmur now at the apparent good fortune of the poor soldiers. Many I have myself seen, vile enough to say, that they never deserved such favour from the country. The only wish I would bestow upon such hard-hearted wretches, is, that they might be compelled to go through just such sufferings and privations as that army did; and then if they did not sing a different tune, I should miss my guess.
But I really hope these people will not go beside themselves. Those men whom they wish to die on a dung-hill ”

“ In the month of June, this year, orders came out for enlisting men for six months from the twenty-fifth of this month. The troops were stiled new levies, they were to go to New-York; and, notwithstanding I was told that the British army at that place was reinforced by fifteen thousand men, it made no alteration in my mind; I did not care if there had been fifteen times fifteen thousand, I should have gone just as soon as if there had been but fifteen hundred. I never spent a thought about numbers, the Americans were invincible, in my opinion. ”

“ We were allowed the kitchen and a comfortable fire, and we happened to have, just then, what a soldier of the revolution valued next to the welfare of his country, and his own honour, that is, something to eat, and being all in good health, and having the prospect of a quiet night's rest; all which comforts happening to us at this time, put us in high spirits. ”

“ The Indian flour was much worse than the meal, being so fine it was as clamy as glue, and as insipid as starch. We were glad to get even this, for nothing else could be had; flesh meat was nearly as scarce as wheaten bread, we had but very little of the former, and not any of the latter; there was not the least thing to be obtained from the inhabitants, they being so near the enemy, and many of them seemed to be as poor as ourselves.
The guard kept at Woodbridge, being so small, and so far from the troops, and so near the enemy that they were obliged to be constantly on the alert. ”

“ O, my grandsire was in a woful passion. I stood aloof. Whose fault was it, he inquired; the blame was quickly laid to my account, and justly too, for I was the only culprit. The old gentleman came at me, hammer and tongs, with his six feet cartwhip. Ah, thought I to myself, good legs, do your duty now, if ever; I houghed the gravel, or rather the marsh, in good earnest. There were twenty people, or more, near us at work; they all suspended their labour to see the race. But I was too light-footed for the old gentleman, and the people on the marsh setting up a laugh, it rather disconcerted him ”

“ New-Jersey and Pennsylvania ladies are, in my opinion, collectively handsome, the most so of any in the United States. But I hope our Yankee ladies will not be jealous at hearing this; I allow that they have as many mental beauties as the others have personal, perhaps more, I know nothing about it—they are all handsome.
We passed through Princeton and encamped on the open fields for the night, the canopy of heaven for our tent. Early next morning we marched again and came up with the rear of the British army. ”

“ Our people let the enemy advance until they arrived at the fence, when they arose and poured in a volley upon them. How many of the enemy were killed and wounded could not be known, as the British were always as careful as Indians to conceal their losses. There were, doubtless, some killed, as I myself counted nineteen ball-holes through a single rail of the fence at which the enemy were standing when the action began. The British gave back and our people advanced into the field. ”

“ Going one evening upon a piquet guard, in a subaltern officer's command, a mile or two farther up the river, we had to march through the inclosures close upon the bank of the river. There was a small party of British upon an island in the river, known, generally, by a queer name, given it upon as queer an occasion, which I shall not stop now to unfold. These British soldiers seemed to be very busy in chasing some scattering sheep, that happened to be so unlucky as to fall in their way. ”

“ I immediately informed the Captain, who had him wrapt up and sent off to the hospital at Newburgh. The men who conveyed him to the hospital, returned in the evening and informed us that he was dead, having been seized with the lockjaw, convulsions, or something else, caused by the wound. Thus a poor fellow, who had braved the hardships and perils of the war, till the very close of it, "died as a fool dieth," causing his own death by his folly. But, perhaps, if another man had been in his stead, he would have acted just as he did. ”

“ The women of the house were all the time going and coming to and from the room; they looked at me but said nothing.—"They asked me no questions and I told them no lies." When my game was sufficiently broiled, I took it by the hind leg and made my exit from the house with as little ceremony as I had made my entrance. When I got into the street I devoured it after a very short grace and felt as refreshed as the old Indian did when he had eaten his crow roasted in the ashes with the feathers and entrails.
We marched from hence and crossed the Delaware again between Burlington and Bristol. ”