Punctilio

“ The sudden disappearance of that Italianized Westphalian, the fiery Cruvelli, was a nine days' wonder in the operatic world in 1854 and is duly chronicled in Punch. Towards the end of this period Piccolomini, a singer of small calibre but attractive personality, achieved great popularity in the rôle of the consumptive heroine of La Traviata, and Punch celebrated the craze of "Piccolomania," as he called it, in the following travesty:—
Art is long and time is fleeting,
But of genius the soul,
Ordinary talent beating,
Reaches at one stride the goal. ”

“ Miss Ivory. No trouble at all.
[Exit right.]
Sud. When you want to get a character out, you've got to get 'em out.
Mr. Inkwell [at right of table, to Mrs. Pencil] . You here!
Mrs. Pencil [at left of table] . Sch! I had to come! I couldn't live without you any longer——
Inkwell. But in this house?
Mrs. Pencil. I was her mother's friend.
Inkwell. You are indiscreet——
Mrs. Pencil. I was desperate for you! You kept putting me off—when I read about this strike I had to come.
Sud. Mrs. Pencil is the dreadful woman! A play can't exist without her——
Wouldby. You mean she was his——
Sud [seriously] . ”

“ I sternly remark that "nice girls never pun."
"Yes," she replies; "punning, like beer and other vices, is the peculiar prerogative of men, I suppose. But you need not be afraid. I read PUNCHINELLO sometimes, and it is a terrible warning to people who are tempted to pun. I could give you frightful instances of the appalling depth to which the men who make puns in PUNCHINELLO occasionally sink."
I hastily close the discussion by inviting her to come to WALLACK'S and see an old comedy. ”

“ They have been indulging, sir, until the top of your head has fallen over backwards, and your whiskers act as though they belonged to somebody else. The sight confuses me, sir, and in my present state of mind I can't bear it."
Coughing from the lemon tea, and greatly amazed by his hasty dismissal, Mr. CLEWS followed Judge SWEENEY from the room and house in precipitate haste, and, when they were fairly out of doors, remarked, that the gentleman they had just left had surprised him unprecedentedly, and that he was very much put out by it. ”

“ A Correspondent suggests that in No. 30 our artist has given Mr. C. A. DANA, in representing him as refusing a bribe with virtuous indignation, a two-cent-imental an expression. In reply, Mr. PUNCHINELLO—although his own opinion is that the mistake has been in making it rather dollar-ous than cent-imental—would refer his correspondent to the artist.
A QUERY FOR SOL-UTION.
Is it a fact that, because Sol is the Latin for Sun, being on the Sun is therefore equivalent to being a SOLON?
TO THE DIPLOMATISTS OF THE HUB.
Whether the Boston dip is a penny one or not, it is nevertheless scandalous. ”

“ Even now, while, in my deepest heart, I release Mr. DIBBLE and Mr. PENDRAGON from all suspicion, I cannot entirely rid my mind of the impression that you, Mr. SIMPSON, in an hour when, from undue indulgence in stimulants, you were not wholly yourself, may have been tempted, by the superior fineness of the alpaca, to slay a young man inexpressibly dear to us all."
"Great heavens, Mr. BUMSTEAD!" panted the Gospeler, livid with horror, "I never—"
—"Not a word, sir!" interrupted the Ritualistic organist,—"not a word, Reverend sir, or it may be used against you at your trial." ”

“ One night, having been entreated by a select party of his most aged patients to go with them on a horniferous bendation, he gradually dropped, by dramific degrees, in a state of absolute tipsidity, and four clergymen, who happened to be passing, carried him home on a shutter, and thus ushered him in all his drunkosity, into the presence of his little better-half, who was drawing in crayons in the back parlor. "My dear," said she, looking up with an angelic smile, "why did you come home in that odd manner, upon a shutter?" ”

“ The first of them is honourable, but the other octaves are quite the contrary. I cannot believe that you, who have been of such honour, have become so bold." For such sincere objurgation and the very tenor of the letters in which no dishonesty is read, clearly show and declare the spirit of Pompilia, who wrote them. For just as words are to be understood according to the thought of the one proffering them, so likewise should letters be interpreted according to the intention of the one writing them. [Citations.] ”

“ A villainess always talks with a foreign accent.
Mrs. Pencil. I haven't had much time to read particulars about the strike. Does your father still refuse to arbitrate?
Miss Ivory [haughtily] . What right have brick-layers to make rules for my father? He would show his weakness if he gave in—I have faith that what he does is right.
Sud [to Wouldby] . The innocent heroine, so cool and pure and white.
[The right door opens and Inkwell enters—he starts as he sees Mrs. Pencil; there is a straight look of recognition between them which Miss Ivory does not see.] ”

“ To be sure, by reason of my somewhat exceptional persistence and ingenuity, I managed to be always in possession of some substitute for a pencil, surreptitiously obtained, a fact which no doubt had something to do with the doctor's indifference to my request. But my inability to secure a pencil in a legitimate way was a needless source of annoyance to me, and many of my verbal indiscretions were directly inspired by the doctor's continued refusal. ”

“ You did not know, you villain, that the letter you had written on the subject was being preserved, you did not know that you would be convicted by your own testimony.116 The fact is that Pudentilla, knowing your changeableness and unreliability no less than your shamelessness and mendacity, rather than forward the letter preferred to keep it as clear evidence of your intentions, and wrote a letter of her own on the same subject to her son Pontianus at Rome, in which she gave full reasons for her determination. She told him pretty fully about the state of her health ”

“ Press has honored PUNCHINELLO with a brief as well as premature obituary paragraph. Flattered as he is by being thus noticed in the columns of a journal of the long standing and well sustained popularity of the Free (and Easy) Press, it pains PUNCHINELLO to be obliged to state that he still lives, and that he is not only alive, but kicking. ”

“ Pencil, who is back of table center.]
Wouldby. A great playwright has to be economical with his great ideas!
Sud. Yes, if he wants a yacht.
Mrs. Pencil [studying her book] . Now I see, now I see—Mr. Sud. Shall I go on?
Sud. Yes, go on!
[Sud comes down right to Wouldby.]
Mrs. Pencil. Oh! Clem—I was so frightened when I heard about the strikers. Even if you are their leader now, they might turn and murder you.
[Mrs. Pencil and Inkwell play center, front of table.]
Inkwell. Nonsense, I control the strikers, they come to me for orders. ”

“ The oaths are of course omitted, out of deference to the tender susceptibilities of the editor of PUNCHINELLO. So are the indecencies, which are the spice of the old comedy, but which cannot be written in a respectable journal, and are almost too gross and brutal for the Sun. Take from an old comedy its oaths and its grossness, and nothing is left but a residuum of boisterous inanity. The condensed old comedy which has just been laid before the readers of PUNCHINELLO, is as inane and vapid as anything that WALLACK'S theatre has shown us in the past month. Do you find it dull? ”

“ Now that the Pantomime season is drawing to a close and the intelligent student of this branch of Drama is tempted to pass it in review, it may be useful to him to have a list of possible Pantomimes drawn up in a tabulated form according to genus and species, that their finer distinctions, so easily overlooked, may be the better apprehended. Mr. Punch has no hesitation in placing his nice erudition at the disposal of his readers. ”

“ And oh that he had been with me these last few days at Arpinum, as he had himself set his heart on being, and as I had no less done! As to Pomponia, please write and say that, when I go out of town anywhere, she is to come with me and bring the boy. I'll do wonders with him, if I get him to myself when I am at leisure: for at Rome there is no time to breathe. ”

“ DIBBLE.
"And it was good as new," groaned the organist, with but one eye open.
"Almost new!—what was?"
"Th'umbrella."
"Mr. BUMSTEAD," returned the old man, coldly, "I am not talking of an umbrella, but of Mr. EDWIN."
"Yesh, I know," said the uncle. "Awright. I'm li'lle sleepy; tha'sall."
"I've just seen my ward, Mr. BUMSTEAD."
"'She puerwell, shir?"
"She is not pretty well. Nor is Miss PENDRAGON."
"I'm vahr' sorry," said Mr. BUMSTEAD, just audibly.
"Miss PENDRAGON scorns the thought of any blame for her brother," continued Mr. DIBBLE, eyeing the fire. ”

“ Latin f is not like the Greek φ, which was a double sound rather than a single one, namely p + h with each element distinctly audible, as in English top-heavy, uphill. Quintilian says: "The Greeks are accustomed to aspirate; whence Cicero in his oration for Fundanius ridicules a witness who could not sound the first letter of that name." [2] The descriptions given by Priscian and Terentianus Maurus of the position of the lips and teeth in pronouncing f show that it was formed precisely as our f, i.e. with the lower lip against the upper teeth. ”

“ This, Cicero says, was taken as an omen; for it sounded like "Cave ne eas," which must therefore have been pronounced Cau' n' eas. Conversely, in poetry, the vowel v sometimes strengthens into consonant v. Thus in Plautus, Lucretius, and even in Vergil and Statius, this happens in such words as puella, suo, genua, larua, and tenuis. Finally, the fact that both sounds of v are represented by the same character, is evidence that those sounds must have been nearly alike. But the consonant sound that is nearest to the vowel sound of u, is the sound of the English w. ”

“ But here the circus folk protested. "Be [Pg 122] off! Be off! You bunch of rags!" cried they. "Our Punchinello was no beggar, and you are not he."
"I swear I am!" cried Punchinello. "Do you not know me, little Beppo?"
"When I was ill and could not walk," the child replied, "a clown called Punchinello cured me of my lameness by his merry songs and ways; but his face I know not. He came always in the night. When he danced, he danced so swiftly that a million harlequins there seemed to be about me: and when he held me in his arms, I hid my head against his shoulder, because I loved him dearly." ”

“ Punch, as a good humanist, essayed a similar task [Pg 354] at a time when the revival of Latin for conversational purposes was proposed by some hardy classicists. As he justly remarks: "The advantages of Latin in this context will not have escaped the notice of even the most superficial observers. Thus the bad effect on caddies of using strong language in the vernacular is entirely obviated. Again, when the ball is lying dead, only a dead language can render justice to the situation." ”

“ Punch has always greeted our ear. We therefore say by all means let it so continue. A little practice will soon enable you to articulate the sound of words intelligibly, and until you are proficient in its use, the answer of the other figure will convey the meaning. Thus, Punch, in his squeaking voice, asks for the baby. Judy answers, “Oh, Mr. Punch, you want the baby, do you? Well, I’m afraid it’s asleep, but I’ll go and see.” Let the squeaker be (a good one) placed on the centre of the tongue, held close to the roof of the mouth and the words spoken through it. ”

“ PUNCHINELLO, I was interrupted by a peculiar sound, which I at first took for subdued applause, but which, on investigation, I found proceeded from the noses of the audience. In short, Mr. P., both audience and Convention were in a profound slumber. Considerably mortified, I withdrew in silence. I am determined, however, that my theses shall not be lost to posterity. I intend to have them published, and to send you a copy of each.
Profoundly yours,
CHINCAPIN.
Pearing Time. ”

“ My attention was first particularly drawn to the Pentamerone in the year 1834, by the publication of Mr. Keightley's Tales and Popular Fictions, in which, and in his Fairy Mythology, he has given a translation of several of these stories. I had great difficulty in obtaining a copy of the work, which is very scarce in this country; but at length, through the kindness of a friend, I procured one from Naples. ”

“ But I am overheard by a horsey person in the neighborhood, who replies, "That horse hain't got a symptom of foundering. LENT keeps his horses in too good condition for that."
And I to him, in a light and jocose manner—"LENT keeps them so well fed that they never keep Lent themselves, I suppose."
But the horsey person does not see my joke,—thus proving that he shares a dulness of perception that I have too often noticed, even among my friends. So I mercifully give him one more chance and say: "I suppose Mr. LENT keeps all the fast horses, so that they never have to keep fast themselves." ”

“ The smaller forms occur northward, while the larger are found southward. This is unquestionably Bailey's form, as indicated by his figure and by the fact that it is found everywhere along the coast. Wm. Smith's T. punctata is the same species, although the puncta are smaller.
Panduriformes
NITZSCHIA PANDURIFORMIS GREG.
Valve elliptical, constricted in the middle, with sub-cuneate apices; longitudinal fold, with a punctate longitudinal line; striæ transverse and oblique, 15 in 10 μ; keel puncta, 6 in 10 μ. L. 108 μ. ”